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Forum: Trying to Conceive after Loss


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July 1st, 2013, 08:06 AM
Six in the City
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 808
How long has everyone waited to start TTC again? And what has been the hardest part for you? I find that I am obsessive over it but it gives me something to focus on. But I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop and it to go back to being unbearable.
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Last edited by arngwifey; July 1st, 2013 at 08:41 AM.
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July 1st, 2013, 09:57 AM
momology's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 6,452
We had to wait 6 months to TTC again because of the type of miscarriage I had. I found the waiting to be unbearable and now that we are back to TTC I find myself a little bit nervous but all the waits dont seem quite as bad (waiting to O, TWW. . . )

I do like having something to focus on like temping and OPKs. It makes me feel like I am doing something.

Cautiously expecting Seamonkey #2 Due Oct 4th

Missing our angels:
Molar pregnancy loss (12 weeks) - 1/2013
Missed Miscarriage (10 weeks) - 6/2013
Early Miscarriage (5 weeks) - 12/2016

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July 1st, 2013, 10:35 AM
Redneck_Mommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: SE Texas
Posts: 1,503
I wasn't given a specific timeline. My doctor told me what was most important was to be mentally ready. Our last loss was December 23, 2012. It was horrific, traumatic, torture. Not to mention, very expensive. We still have not recovered financially. I don't think there will ever be a total mental recovery for either of us. But, this month we are not preventing, so I'm hopeful for a BFP. My husband still isn't mentally ready, but he knows that more waiting isn't going to help that. So, I guess that has been the hardest part for me. Waiting for him to realize the pain of losing our son was never going away, and we have to go on with our lives and hope our next pregnancy works.
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July 1st, 2013, 01:51 PM
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 268
I lost this one on June 21st and just stopped bleeding. We are going to NTNP this cycle which Im not expecting to get pregnant, then once AF comes this month/next month we will be back to actively trying.
Michelle Mommy to Braydin 10, Cherry 7, Isaiah 8 months, 12/10, 01/11 and 06/13

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July 1st, 2013, 06:04 PM
Rainbow Catcher's Avatar Bound and Determined
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Virginia
Posts: 1,428
I'm not waiting.. my doc said to wait one cycle, and I asked her why - she said to date the pregnancy, but medically there is no reason to wait. Well... they can't date me anyways because my cycles are so weird ... so I'm hoping.

I m/c'd on 6/7... bled for another week and a half or so.. and it was pretty painful afterwards (physically) the first few times we tried, but everything is back to normal now.
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July 2nd, 2013, 09:51 AM
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 324
We waited one cycle after the first loss and then waited to complete testing after the second. I think the forced waiting this time actually gave me a break that I would not have otherwise taken. We are trying again and the tww is so hard! I hope you recover quickly and I would say go for it when you feel ready.
me - D (39)
DH - T (45)
DS - 6 DD - 4
10/2012 (7weeks)
1/2013 (8 weeks)
10/2013 (11 weeks, trisomy 21)

IVF#1 - June '14
24 eggs, 18 mature, 10 fertilized with ICSI
4 blasts sent for PGS, 2 chromosomal normal boys
IVF #2 - September '14 25 eggs, 18 mature
7 blasts sent for PGS, all abnormal
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July 2nd, 2013, 11:11 AM
smsturner's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Upstate, NY
Posts: 3,884
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We had been trying for about four years when we had our loss. Infertility had already been so hard to get through, that we weren't willing to give ourselves much time. So we did a med cycle after waiting one cycle.
That didn't work, but the next month we got our bfp.
Susan, dh Tom, dd Megan (15), ds Marcus (13), Our together miracle, baby Dean, 17 months

Crazy enough to try all over again for a second together baby! Hoping for a much less wild ride this time!

TTC with PCOS for 5 very long years. Annovulatory cycles. Multiple doctors. Different meds. One horrible loss. And then one wonderful success, born 2/18/14.

I never knew until that moment how badly it could hurt to lose something you never really had. - Missed Miscarriage at 10 weeks - 3/26/13
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July 2nd, 2013, 01:09 PM
Eleanor-Abigail's Avatar Keep Calm and Baby Dance
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: TX
Posts: 376
OP, I am sorry for your loss. Hugs!

I was going to "wait one cycle," but I have been very irregular so that complicates things.
For a few months after my Nov missed m/c I really, really wanted to be pregnant again-you might even say obsessed. Then I realized I needed to give myself some time to heal emotionally. DH also appears ready to try again too, now 7 months later. I would have been happy to have been pregnant before this but my body is just not cooperating and my cycles are irregular.

OP, it seems like if you have "nothing else going on" w/ your body, and your cycles come back in a month or two, you can conceive again. Emotionally, I really feel ready now. As much as I desperately wanted to be pregnant right away after my loss, I don't think, now, that I was ready.

How are you feeling, emotionally and physically?
Username is a combo of 2 strong real-life (and fertile) mamas!

2, 4, 6, 8...c'mon body, ovulate!

Nov '12
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July 2nd, 2013, 09:09 PM
Schofield06's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Missouri
Posts: 2,364
I waited 3 months last time, but this time I just waited till after I got some test results back.
Aug. 21 2012
Mar. 31 2013
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July 3rd, 2013, 07:10 AM
Just keep breathing.
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 1,734
After my first two losses, I waited one cycle. This time (after third loss), I'll have been waiting at least 2, since I am going to an RE at the end of this month. I may have to wait even longer depending on what testing the RE wants to do.

I have to say, this time it's actually been kind of a relief to be TTA. In the last year I've been either pregnant or miscarrying or waiting for a cycle to resume, on any given month. I want my rainbow baby desperately, but I'm very hopeful about the RE and am willing to wait an extra month or two to have a better chance.

As for the hardest thing? Geez, all of it?
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July 3rd, 2013, 08:36 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 547
I was planning on waiting only one cycle but with my husband's work schedule he hasn't been home at the right time so we are now on month four. Here's hoping that he will actually be home (or I may have to travel and make a conjugal visit).

03/13 - missed miscarriage at 11 weeks
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July 3rd, 2013, 01:48 PM
jmills1129's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 961
I MC'd on June 16, (yep happy fathers day to us) anyways, bled for a week and waited one more before being intimate with my hubby. We have been on an every other night pattern, and I have no idea if I will end up with a BFP or not, and do not really know when to expect my AF to show, so have no idea when to test!!! My dr said he would prefer we waited for one AF, but that we didn't technically have to wait. I guess when I go in next week for my hcg levels we will see...

9w4d, June, 16 2013
Missing My Angel baby
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