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Forum: Children with Developmental Delays and Disorders


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December 20th, 2007, 04:42 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 6,966
Somedays I really want to. I never would though. Things are so overwhelming with Jay. It feels like we take one step foward and two steps back. When he gets sick the agression gets worse. I am not going to lie the aggression scares me. I know kids fight but it is such a battle on a daily basis. I talked to his teacher about discipline. She gave me so ideas. I am just afraid one of these days he may really hurt Jonathan. He was good about putting his cup on the table. He is back to throwing it. He was starting to be good about not throwing things but its starting up again. The reality of him possibly having autism is setting in. My grandma, great aunt, Jay's teacher all say it sounds like he is showing signs. He spins around in circles alot. Usually 3 times a day or more. He fixiates on wheels or anything he can spin. I try to get him to do other things but it does not always work. He has had a regression in his speech. He has alot of behvioral issues. He is a great boy and he can be very loving. I just want to have a good cry.
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December 20th, 2007, 06:15 AM
outnumbered's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: On Top of Mt. Laundry
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Go ahead and have your cry, don't be embarrased about it. It's very hard, I know. Hunter was abusive in the beginning, too, but once we got him to cummunicate, thru sign language and PECS (Picture Exchange System) he stopped hitting and having tantrums.

Hang in there. It really does get better.

My computer won't let me open the Show All of the smiley faces. I wanted to use a couple of the HUGS one.
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I am a breastfeeding, cloth diapering, co-sleeping, no crying it out, baby wearing mama of 3 boys, one of which has autism. Meet my boys here (having technical difficulties with my website). My blogs are On Top of Mt. Laundry and The Cache Checkers.

Most frequently found at the Cloth Diapering board but also a member of the July '05 PR, Austim board and the Choosing Not To Vaccinate board.

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December 20th, 2007, 01:17 PM
picklesmama's Avatar <;,><
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 22,604
I'm sorry Christina. Sometimes if I need a good cry, I go take a shower and have my cry - then nobody's the wiser
I don't really have aggression issues with Gus (other than if he doesn't want to be changed or get in his car seat). I could see the beginnings of aggression in him last year though, when he would get frustrated about not being able to communicate, and I really think that because we were fortunate to get a early diagnosis, before he was 3, and got him in speech and OT right away, we were able to avoid him getting aggressive because he has a way to communicate, most of the time. I know you are having to wait to see a specialist, but you don't need to wait to begin helping him communicate, there are things you can do yourself. One thing you can do is take pictures of things he might want, like a favorite lunch, what he likes to drink, clean diapers or the toilet, the park he likes to go to, the television showing a program he likes, etc, and then he can use those to communicate what he wants to you. That's what we did at home and it has been very helpful for Angus, he no longer has to get all frustrated and angry if he is having trouble getting words out. We laminated ours and put magnets on the back, but you could put them in a little album, or stick velcro on them and make a velcro board for the wall, or keep them in a box, whatever works. PBS also has a show called Signing Time that my little guy loves, and we have learned some simple signs from that - they have helped immensely.
Anyways, those are a few ideas for aggression issues that might stem from communication difficult. Other than that, I don't know. Last night I started watching that Dr. Phil episode you saw the other day (fell asleep a few minutes into it though, prescription meds are making me drowsy) and the little boy featured in the beginning was nothing like Gus, he was so angry, and i have no experience with that. My heart went out to those parents big time, and to you if that is the kind of thing you are dealing with. Have that cry if you need it.

Crissy mama to Jack 7.16.01 ~ Mia Bella 10.29.02
Angus Pickle 2.24.04 ~ Sydney Bean 10.26.06 & Kater Tot 2.15.09

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December 20th, 2007, 06:31 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 6,966
Thank you both*
Crissy thanks for the ideas. Jay's teacher gave me laminated pictures with stuff that is used on a daily basis like bathtub stuff like that. Maybe I will get some magnets for them. Jay is not as aggressive as that boy that was on dr Phil. He can get pretty agressive but not that bad.
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December 21st, 2007, 03:43 PM
Tammyjh's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: North
Posts: 7,824
Crying can be very helpful. I usually feel a bit better after having a good cry and have been having quite a few of them lately. My dd is aggressive as well but she's become more out of control as she's gotten older. As she's 14 and my size, the physcial aggression is a big problem. We are almost positive we're seeing regression and we're struggling to get to the right specialist who'll really look at the evals, the lates EEG and MRI. I have my cry and then move on.
Wishing you all kinds of luck and progress with Jay
Tammy, Mom to
Abby (19), Kacie (13), Chase (11), & Jacob (7)

"...They're supposed to make you miserable! That's why they're family!" ~ Bobby ~ Supernatural
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December 23rd, 2007, 01:54 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 2,160
I agree with the others, cry because it helps relieve your stress even if it does nothing else.

My son (now 11 1/2) was very aggressive when he was younger, pretty much until he was 4 1/2 and started to learn to talk. We learnt how to use a picture board (which you are doing) and I wish I had known about signing back then because I am using it with my toddler son now and it is a Godsend so if you aren't doing it try and teach him some signs. Frustration due to lack of communication skills would definitely be one of the reasons for the aggression now. My son would hurl giant Lego blocks, those little metal cars, anything because he would be so frustrated.

My son has always gotten worse when he is sick, in fact it's so noticeable we often know he is coming down with something before there are any physical symptoms at all just because he gets spacey, walks on his toes more and gets angry with EVERYONE then hey presto and couple of days later he is sick.

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