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Not sure if done, need advice

Forum: Done Having Children


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  • 1 Post By #5in2005

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August 23rd, 2012, 06:12 AM
kamiyu910's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Hesperia, CA
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Hi. I'm currently 28 almost 29 weeks pregnant with my second child, another boy, and my dh and i have been talking about possibly being done because my body doesn't seem to do well with pregnancy. I really hate being pregnant. I have fibromyalgia and the pain gets so much worse, and I just seem to have a lot of problems.
But at the same time I really don't know if I'm truly ready to be done. Sitting here at 4-5 am rocking my 14 month old back to sleep while feeling like I'm about to throw up may not be the best time to think about it, but it really makes me depressed. Getting a tubal is so final... I feel like my body is just failing me and I'm super depressed not knowing what to do. With my first son I had hyperimesis, threw up for 5 months and was on meds for it, the developed mild pre-e for which i ended up being induced, which took 3 days. I could not handle the pain of labor and I'm considering myself blessed my son was born healthy after passing meconium in the womb a good 12+ hrs to coming out and coming out with the cord wrapped around his arm, leg, and neck.
This pregnancy has been slightly better, though plagued by severe migraines for which i see a neurologist for on friday. The pain in my body is so intense I have a hard time chasing my toddler around, much less doing housework. The only pain medicine I've had that works is a serious narcotic called Norco. i don't want to rely on that.

I was wondering what experiences everyone here has had, if anyone can offer any advice or something... Dh supports me in any decision, as it is my body, but he's done with kids right now and hates the baby stage so much. He may change his mind later, but do i really want to try another 9 months of potential Hell with very little help?

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August 23rd, 2012, 09:37 AM
*Jennifer*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: California
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If I were in your place, I would be done. You have an adorable little boy and another one on the way. Why put yourself at risk to have another baby?

I am sorry your pregancies are so awful.
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August 25th, 2012, 01:15 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2004
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If you're not sure, then don't do anything permanent. For myself I knew I was done after my 5th, (DONE!!!) and yet you almost kind of have to grieve that the having babies stage is over, even if it was not fun. (my last labour was awful and my baby was colicky). Give yourself time to process, no one says you have to get your tubes tied right away.
4wildflowers likes this.
mom of 5 girls
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August 27th, 2012, 04:14 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Sitka
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I would say you sound pretty unsure, I might wait untill after the baby was born to decide. My dh got snipped three months after my second and it was the best thing for us. We also are undecided if we want more children if we do we will adopt ( I refuse to go through another birth. With both my kids things went really wrong)

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