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:( i guess i am NTNP.. tmi

Forum: Trying to Conceive Your First Child


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January 20th, 2013, 04:33 AM
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 97
I am just a little sad/ confused... DH knows I really want to have a baby, and we started trying so i thought, and sorry the couple days that it matters to try he decided i to use the pull out method or tell me no he isnt in the mood. It totally broke my heart.. I am on CD 14 .. on CDs 4, 6, 10 and 11 we BD and he did the deed.. lol sorry not sure how to put that. and CD 12 i was denied, CD 13 he pulled out.. I am just wondering if anyone thinks there is a chance of a lil sticky bean this time around.. or how to not be so upset.. sorry i am being a downer.. thanks ladies

My Ovulation Chart
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January 20th, 2013, 10:15 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Derbyshire, UK
Posts: 4,985
Hi, I'm Jen one of the co-hosts of the board. I'm really sorry that youre having a difficult time starting TTC. It can take a while for DH's to come on board at first, a lot of peopple have said that their DH / partner wanted to 'try naturally' without all the pressure etc to begin withand just have fun. Maybe thats whats up with your DH? maybe the pressure of knowing youre tracking your fertile days etc is just a bit much for him? Have you spoken to him about it? Either way, i'm sorry its upsetting you

With regards to whether you have a shot this cycle, it all depends on when you ovulate. Are you using OPK's or tracking your BBT or CM so you know when you O? Very few women O consistently on day 14 every cycle like is commonly thought. If you're an early O'er and have O'd already then maybe, but its just as likely you havent O'd yet this cycle and still have time.

Oh and nothing is around here so feel free to share / ask any questions you need

Hope thats helps, hang in there
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January 20th, 2013, 08:42 PM
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Southeast, US
Posts: 3,040
Not TMI at all. And you wouldn't believe how much I relate to your story!

My husband and I had the talk about coming off of the birth control pill and beginning the TTC process. Well as soon as I came off of the pill he started, like yours, pulling out. Or he was wanting to finish himself. I was SO hurt! And mad, too. We talked about it (not always fun) and he told me he was NERVOUS to have a kid...and have one too soon. In his mind he didn't even want to take the chance that he could knock me up right away. He was thinking that I should have a few normal cycles and we should wait until February before getting serious.

I wouldn't say we resolved the situation completely. I took some time off from BDing in order to kind of be disappointed and then cheer up. Eventually I started trying to make things more spicy in the bed room, and I think that helped some.

Give it time. Come hang in here with us ladies. I offer you a big hug!

Last edited by SmilingSam; January 20th, 2013 at 08:46 PM.
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January 21st, 2013, 12:32 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 1,227
Hi. We just got through our 1st cycle TTC and I started out weird as well. We had talked about TTC sometime mid year and then one day at the beginning of december he just didn't make me get off! I started looking into everything about when to try, fertility, etc.

He as well wanted to try the "natural" process. It took him a few weeks to get into the fact that if you are not preventing then you are trying! Now he is all excited and into it.

We are all here for each other. Maybe DH just needs some time, I know mine did. Definitely no such thing as tmi on here! First month is stressful but his month honestly I don't think it's been this fun BDing in a while! We both solved some issues that we were having with each other. So really it was a blessing in disguise!

Good luck darlin and keep your head up! Communication is key!
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January 21st, 2013, 02:14 PM
KellJoO's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 4,116
I'm sorry hun- just know that we all go thru it at times.

I can have issues with getting my DF to DTD and then sometimes we have the issue of him wanting to pull out and do something "kinky" with it. Thats frustrating- especially when its during your fertile time.

I think its different for us because we get so emotionally involved with the whole process and I've heard many people say that the guys don't actually get emotionally involved sometimes until the baby is actually here.

Give it some time for him to come around- if he's not ready there's no sense in pressuring him. But at the same time he needs to know how you're feeling.

IMO- "not trying not preventing" would just be a recipe for disaster for me. Especially if I were dealing with the pulling out issue.
Mommy to

Brooks Kinlee Barnes
6 lbs 13 oz 18.25"
Two in Heaven
2/7/2013 (6w4d)
5/22/2015 (4w3d)

Expecting a Baby BOY early January 2017!
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January 22nd, 2013, 05:56 AM
Nicholle ttc's Avatar TTC our first!
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 5,061
So sorry hun! GL and KUP!
TTCing since August 2011
Me (33)-LP on the short side, but no other abnormalities
DH (37)-slightly subfertile morphology and motility

Natural cycles-August 2011-July 2012
August 2012-October 2012 clomid and progesterone
November 2012-IUI
December 2012, cysts from IUI, on bcp

January 2013-February 2013, long protocol IVF
15 eggs retrieved, 11 mature, 7 fertilized with ICSI
All 7 made it to 5 day transfer, 2 were transferred
Only 1 frozen snowbaby
1st IVF

May 10, 2013, lap sx, Stage 1 endo

June 2013 - MA Round 2
Femara + hcg shot
IUI # 2

FET tentatively scheduled for 10/31/13

Have never seen a bfp.

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January 25th, 2013, 07:15 AM
jkgreen's Avatar Awaiting Our First Bundle
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 481
Hi.. I'm lurking. But I wanted to say that my husband did that too... A couple times unprotected and then he would put on a condom for a few.. I'm irregular so I was so completely frustrated because that time could be the time. We were NTNP... One day my body played a trick on me. I was checking my cervix and everything pointed to ovulation.. I'm not one to withhold info from him so I told him, and he "denied" me.. But turns out I geared up to ovulate but failed. I ovulated the next week, because I thought we already had, nothing stopped us. Needless to say, we are due in July.

I guess what I'm trying to say, is that sometimes when you are doing all the checking and charting if you are, sometimes stresses you out more than doing more good.
Also, a talk about how you feel wouldn't hurt either with him.
I'm sending you a truck load of baby dust and patience to you...
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January 25th, 2013, 06:18 PM
ChiChica's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Chicago
Posts: 1,421
Aww, I'm sorry. That's the worst! If I tell DH that it's the important time of the month, he freaks out and can't do the deed. I've decided not to tell him anything about it anymore and just initiate frequent BD that's why I need to come on here and talk to you all!
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