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Warning: Sad mood rant/whine

Forum: Trying to Conceive Your First Child


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  • 2 Post By Boolajoojoo

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July 18th, 2013, 09:51 PM
Ariw's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
Posts: 482
Sorry to clog up the board with negative stuff
I think maybe it's because I'm home sick and REALLY missing my husband but I am just in a sad, depressed mood.

Had alot of down time this morning and just reflecting on our circumstance and ttc situation is just depressing.
We have been married exactly 14 months today...
And I honestly thought we would have had a baby by now...
I know we didn't start trying until April but that was my husbands decision (he wanted to wait until his student loan was paid off so we didn't have any debt besides our mortgage...smart but not my plan)..I just assumed that once we got married I would have my IUD removed (since there was no longer a reason to NOT have a baby) and bam pregnant 2 months after our wedding..... NOPE! 14 months later and we are still in a "who knows" situation.
That coupled with our miscarriage which was devastating...truly devastating
And to top it all off...I know 19384871731463187 people who are pregnant or just had their first baby

I have 2 good friends who are both in their 3rd trimesters
DH has 2 friends at work (really small company of about 30) whos wives are in their 3rd trimesters
A good friend from HS who I keep up with is due in 1 week
My "brother" (my brothers best friend for like 15 years now) is having his first..due date on the 22nd
Friend from work just had his first
Pastor at church just had his first
Worship leader at church just had his first
I know several people from hs on fb that are either pregnant or just recently had one..

Im just overwhelmed by my sadness about not having one yet..not even pregnant

I work a little part time job at whole foods which is fun but its a little nothing job..
Our plan is or me to be a sahm so everything from now until then just seems pointless and tedious
I love my husband and we have really been quite blessed but I'm just ready for our life to begin because it really feels like it hasn't yet.

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July 19th, 2013, 01:26 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Derbyshire, UK
Posts: 4,985
ttc is so emotionally draining and can make everything seem crappy

You'll get there

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July 19th, 2013, 03:51 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 2,325
I'm so sorry you're feeling this way. We've had a lot go on in our short marriage that really has been a slap in the face, and it leaves us feeling that nothing is coming together. I don't know why it comes so easy for others and some people are stuck in limbo.

I hope you feel sorted out soon and ready to try again. ((Hugs)))
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July 19th, 2013, 06:30 AM
Nicholle ttc's Avatar TTC our first!
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 5,061
Totally get it. We've been trying for 2 years....and nothing. Hang-in there it will be worth it in the end. There is a plan for all of us!
TTCing since August 2011
Me (33)-LP on the short side, but no other abnormalities
DH (37)-slightly subfertile morphology and motility

Natural cycles-August 2011-July 2012
August 2012-October 2012 clomid and progesterone
November 2012-IUI
December 2012, cysts from IUI, on bcp

January 2013-February 2013, long protocol IVF
15 eggs retrieved, 11 mature, 7 fertilized with ICSI
All 7 made it to 5 day transfer, 2 were transferred
Only 1 frozen snowbaby
1st IVF

May 10, 2013, lap sx, Stage 1 endo

June 2013 - MA Round 2
Femara + hcg shot
IUI # 2

FET tentatively scheduled for 10/31/13

Have never seen a bfp.

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July 19th, 2013, 06:40 AM
momology's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 6,452
It is so hard to be so far away from home especially after all you and your DH have been through. Hang in there Ari Try and enjoy the rest of your trip and you will be amazed at how fast the time actually goes by when you look back.


Cautiously expecting Seamonkey #2 Due Oct 4th

Missing our angels:
Molar pregnancy loss (12 weeks) - 1/2013
Missed Miscarriage (10 weeks) - 6/2013
Early Miscarriage (5 weeks) - 12/2016

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July 19th, 2013, 08:37 AM
girlsofsummer's Avatar Us two became we three <3
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Pittsburgh (Go Steelers!)
Posts: 1,191
Just wanted to commiserate about the student loan thing. It sucks royally

Wishing you all the best and thinking of you <3
Mirielle Margaret born 4/24
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July 19th, 2013, 09:03 AM
jessicake's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 385
Aww hun, I get it *hugs* We've been married 4 years, 25 months of no birth control now. 13 months of charting and trying hard. It's hard. Our plan was always for me to be a SAHM too. Right now I just book keep and do the farm thing from home.

It is tough now at this age where everybody is having babies. We are surrounded by it too, we have 10 little nieces and nephew. One just born in April who was an accident, which is maddening!!! And I just found out it'll still be a wait and more surgery before a pregnancy is even maybe possible :/

So! I feel your pain *hugs* It's pretty tough to go through.
Fertility Chart

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July 19th, 2013, 10:57 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 1,227
You should stop by the TTC after miscarriage board. There are alot of ladies going through this same thing right now and can completely relate to you. I am sorry that your going through this. Big hugs to you!

Married to my best friend

~*~**Proud Army Wife**~*~
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July 19th, 2013, 01:05 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 723

I feel your pain.

Definitely don't think of it as if your life hasn't begun. TTC is a journey though, and part of life, try not to let it consume you. There really is only so much you can do. But do what you can, for sure.

I wish I had some good advice, and I don't want to spout any of the stereotypical stuff that people who have kids would say because they just say enjoy all the things you can do without kids and blah blah blah. Me personally, I never go anywhere, I don't like to party or stay out late, so I know that this is just plain wrong... people who didn't want kids in the first place will say those things.

Me personally...
Yeah... I have animals, I got a kitten... because I wanted something to nurture...

You might not be an animal person, but you still got a life and there are things you can be doing to better yourself and benefit your family even if you don't have interest in making your part time gig become a career. Some women want to be SAHMs, I quit an amazing job over a year ago because it was stressful and we thought that it might make the difference in TTC. It hasn't.... I've worked various part time and temp jobs since then... and it feels pretty lame sometimes, I agree...

You shouldn't put life on hold if you don't your BFP right now... We all want it right now and understand the sadness.

Good luck!
MelChicago and AshleyO like this.
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July 19th, 2013, 02:06 PM
epsilonbeta's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: California
Posts: 881
((hugs)) I feel your pain. Everyone has babies, is pregnant, or is trying to get pregnant and come from fertile loins. Our days will come.
Mommy to DS (2.5) and Adopted DS (19). PCOS success story.
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July 20th, 2013, 12:43 PM
PinkHurricane's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Southeast US
Posts: 603
I'm so sorry about what you are going through, there are no words. I just want to send you love and hugs and plenty of good vibes that when your DH is home again that shortly after you guys will be getting a BFP and have a healthy baby!
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July 20th, 2013, 11:04 PM
Cait&AngelAbove's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 10,635
I definitely understand how you feel! The journey can be so emotionally draining. We are here for you!

Thank you so much Bokkechick for the perfect siggie!!!
12-10-10 2-6-12
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