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I am so nerve-wracked

Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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January 10th, 2006, 12:51 AM
LeedaRenee's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,923
Well, I called my new doc's office while I was at work and the nurse told me that she did not see any reason to draw any levels on me unless I was having "complications". This really upset me, because I didnt have any "complications" last time, my baby just died without any external signs. I would go and try and find someone else, but I this lady is supposed to a really good doc.

Everyone is telling me that I should just not worry and be calm and that everything is ok. They dont know if it will be or not, and I wish they would stop saying it. I would fake symptoms and go to the ER except I am afraid that would be tempting fate. I am so sad and worried
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January 10th, 2006, 05:08 AM
Blessings B's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 3,422
At my Docs office they told me the same thing. I ended up called the Doc directly and leaving a voice mail about my situation. ( I had never seen this Doc before) within 24 hours I had an appt for the next day and and ultrasound. I was just too scared to wait. B
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January 10th, 2006, 08:37 AM
Rina42308's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: CA
Posts: 2,991
Leeda, does this dr know your history? Well if you've seen her of course she does but maybe schedule a consultation with her and express your feelings of worry and anxiety...ask for a bit more attention ...surely she would understand if she is truely a good dr? Getting your levels checked is a small price to pay for a less stressful pg. I plan on being VERY honest with my dr tomorrow about my fears and seeing what she thinks about treating me with kid gloves

i am sure everything is fine...I know that doesn't bring you much comfort...I know not having any m/c symptoms last time makes this time all the harder...the first m/c I had I didn't have symptoms either. i was so angry about that...like there's absolutely no way to know. It seems mean and I cursed God for it...I think he understands my anger. Something I am trying to adopt is the whole what will be will be ideaology...i know, I know...you probably want to punch me in the face right now. But seriously I am such a control freak...Type A all the way, so instead of spending my energy worrying, I am doing lots of self talk where I tell myself that all is not in my hands...there is something larger that will determine the fate of my baby now...I can pray and ask...even beg...ultimately God (the universe, etc) knows best for me...
It's a hard concept. I have not yet mastered it...I still have neuortic moments when I do things that seem off the wall because maybe just maybe if I lay down this second all will be ok with the baby...it's maddening huh? We'll get thru this leeda. i am here to hold your hand...i am here to listen. your feeling s are so very valid! I hope my rambling post made some sense?
Mommy to miracle baby 4/23/08 and four babies in heaven:lost 3/22/05 edd 10/28/05, lost 5/25/05 edd 12/26/05, lost 1/31/06 edd 9/19/06

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead
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January 10th, 2006, 10:11 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 1,287
Those first few weeks are the hardest to get through. I agree with Norina that you shoud try to set up a consult with the doctor. Also, the best thing I did for myself in the beginning was to just let go. I had to force myself to realize that no amounts of testing, worrying or doctors would change what would or would not happen. Sure I had my week moments, but for the most part it felt better just to accept life.

"Nothing in this world worth having is easy"
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January 10th, 2006, 11:20 AM
iamkc's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Montana
Posts: 8,137
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Another agreement--set up a consult with your doc. I know that s/he can't really do anything to prevent a miscarriage if it starts, but perhaps you can prevent it from happening at all, depending on the cause. Plus, it sets a nice stage for the rest of the pregnancy if you have a doctor with whom you've established a good rapport. I understand that docs have far more experience with this than any one of us has, but it's still comforting when they listen to US--that we'd just plain feel better knowing certain things.

I'm sorry that you're already so worried and stressed. And let's be honest--even when we KNOW anything and are reassured, it doesn't really make us feel better...we'll find something else to worry about.

Good luck and hugs, Leeda. I hope that your doc will listen to you...

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January 11th, 2006, 08:56 AM
Posts: n/a
Unfortunately, it usually takes 3 miscarriages for them to do anything about it. Some midwifes or drs will after 2 m/c's if you ask... thankfully mine did!! They wouldn't do any level testing after my first m/c tho... but they did this pregnancy (after my second m/c) and only becase I said I NEEDED it for peace of mind.

(((hugs))) Maybe setting up a consult w/ your dr will work. It's worth a try!
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