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People say thes stupdist things

Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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January 28th, 2006, 03:20 PM
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I was picking up my kids at preschool one day (this has been bugging me for awhile) and my daughter (almost 4) wanted to open the gate. No big deal I picked her up and let her. Then my son (almost 2 1/2) wanted to do the same, again, no big deal I picked him up and let him. However, something went haywire in his 2 year old brain, which happens, and he started to melt down. I have no idea why, I've given up trying to understand the 2 year old brain.

Anyhow I am carrying my screaming, kicking, crying boy out to the parking lot while trying to keep my daughter safe from cars and there is a group of moms waiting to pick up their kids and are looking at me (like they don't know what 2 year olds are capable of! ) any how I just shrugged my shoulders and said "2 year olds". And this one mom who KNOWS I lost my baby, but doesn't know I'm pregnant again says to me "And you wanted 3 kids".

I know she was kidding but still it stung. I mean why would you say that to someone who Yes did/does want 3 kids and who lost one! It seemed insensitive, but I guess if you haven't had a loss you don't know. She probably has completely forgotten about my loss anyway. I wanted to smack her.

Thanks for listening. It really has been bugging me.
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January 29th, 2006, 08:04 AM
Prudence's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 653
Most all ppl are idiots. If someone says something they must be thinking it. Even if they never thought it before, in their subconsious mind that person is the biggest idiot.
I have yet to meet the majority of they population that doesn't think negatively and always expect the worst out of others.
I understand ppl have opinions but why didn't anybody ever learn to keep them to themselves. Don't they know nothing needs to be said to anything, no stupid gimmic lines. I am sorry that person said it. And maybe it was just a case of "opps foot in mouth" But I would have been very upset. Who cares if they act up its your business to have 10 kids if you want!!
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January 29th, 2006, 11:38 AM
Rina42308's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: CA
Posts: 2,991
Wow not only was that the stupiest thing to say but was also the most insensitive...
I want to smack her for you Susan...so sorry you came accross yet another idiot!
Mommy to miracle baby 4/23/08 and four babies in heaven:lost 3/22/05 edd 10/28/05, lost 5/25/05 edd 12/26/05, lost 1/31/06 edd 9/19/06

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead
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January 29th, 2006, 08:18 PM
Ethans_Mommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Arizona!
Posts: 2,717
all I can say it wow- and you handled her better than I wouldve!
<div align="center">Stephanie aka "Queen of the Universe" Mommy to Ethan and Leah

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January 30th, 2006, 05:52 AM
Blessings B's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 3,422
oh gosh that really hurt my heart. I glad you are able to have a pos. attitude anyway. People's mouths can sometimes jump before their brain. Hopefully this is what happened. Who knows it does not make the comment any less hurtful. B hugs
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