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Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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March 31st, 2006, 05:48 AM
LeedaRenee's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,923
My NICU is kind of unlike a lot of places. We have occasionally have babies who have been there for 1-2 years. Well yesterday, we had one of our kids turn 1 year old. He has lots of problems and has been on full support. He wasn't really responsive and often suffered pain. His mom, who is special needs, has been at his side the full year. She has learned to take care of him, he is her life. She has been talked to by many docs letting her knwo that his prognosis was bad and that he was only getting worst. For the longest time, she hang on to hope, but for his 1st b-day, she said she was going to give him a gift of peace: She took him off his support. I have known this mom and infant for the last year, I took care of him a lot. I knew he was suffering and often wished that he didnt have to. It's just so hard to see him go and especially his mom, who was so brave during all this. I cried all day yesterday and some of last night. Sometimes I just feel so depressed from my job. I keep thinking about that mom and I wish I could see her again. I am going to try and attend his funeral. I didnt really have a question, I just needed to talk about this somewhere. Thanks for listening.
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March 31st, 2006, 06:07 AM
Prudence's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 653
Thats very heart breaking to hear. It must be so had for his Mom, I know I could never make that decision. I don't know why anyone should have to. They are in my thoughts and prayers.
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March 31st, 2006, 07:19 AM
anissa's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,868
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That is so sad, I do hope the mother can find some peace.
Me Anissa
DH Tom
Kirstin 05/04/03
Gavin Thomas 06/01/06
Emma Grace Born Sleeping 8/4/05 22 Weeks
Some people only dream of holding an Angel I actually held one!
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March 31st, 2006, 10:42 AM
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 313

We are hear to listen, to provide shoulders and hankies (well, virtual ones anyway).

It is especially hard on you now being pregnant. Our hormones are so wonky that we cry more easily, and anything with babies tugs our hearts so much. Especially since you spent so much time with him, this loss can almost feel like yours too.

If you can attend the funeral, make sure to give the mom a hug, she will appreciate the gesture, especially from you, who spent so much time with her & her son.

Both you and his mother are in my thoughts and prayers.
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March 31st, 2006, 10:58 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 599
oh how heart wrenching. even if its best for the little one, what a horrible horrible decision to have to make. i'm am so sorry for her... and for you. I hope she gets some peace and her son as well.
Bubble, 40+ mommy
DS-31 months
DD - 19 months
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March 31st, 2006, 06:44 PM
*~Candy~*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Midwest
Posts: 15,245
That is so sad, and I can't imagine how you must feel since you were there through all of it. Especially since you are pregnant now that only hits closer to home. It is good to know that you were there for the support and to take care of him during his time of need. Going to the funeral will hopefully help you with closure and to see the motehr and let her know how you feel.

*HUGS* we are always here to listen

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April 1st, 2006, 11:13 AM
Posts: n/a
that is heartbreaking. I feel for that mom and all she is going through right now. I'm glad the baby has some peace. Poor little thing. Breaks my heart.
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