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Joining In - Newly pg after loss @36w 8 years ago

Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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April 18th, 2010, 04:11 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,924
Hello Everyone!

Looks like I will be joining you =) I am about 8 weeks along. My first OB appointment is Thursday. My baby Seth passed 8 years ago @ 36 weeks. We had the autopsy done. The results were inconclusive. It was devastating, and we did not want to try again for a while.

We bought a house and both focused on careers. We were not trying/not preventing for several years and then started trying for the last few. We had major job changes in the past couple of months so we went back to not trying/not preventing. I'm 34 so I was starting to think we need to kick it into high gear if we were gonna have one. We were planning to see a fertility doc when things settled, but I ended up pg =)

I am very happy but nervous as heck. Its been so long and I'm going to be soo scared third trimester. For others that had a stillborn, how did you manage? I'm trying to keep all positive thoughts.

I'm also not sure what to expect as far as appointments etc.. If you have had a stillborn with unknown cause do they automatically put you as high risk? I am hoping to get a lot of extra monitoring and reassurance.

I'm very happy to be here!
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April 18th, 2010, 04:55 PM
KDD's Avatar
KDD KDD is offline
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 16,068
Welcome Abie. I'm very sorry for your loss. My loss was an early loss @ 9w6d so I don't have any direct experience. I do have a friend who had a stillbirth at 40w and the autopsy was inconclusive. She went on to have a gorgeous baby girl a year later and is now pregnant again. As far as I know the she only received extra monitoring for her diabetes.
Missing our Angel since April 11, 2008
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April 18th, 2010, 08:49 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: CT
Posts: 982
Welcome Abie. I am pregnant with my 3rd child, a girl this time! My 1st son is 5.5 and my 2nd son was stillborn 4/4/09 (just a year ago)...we believe Joey passed away on his due date and I was induced the next day, delivering the morning of 40w2d. Our stillbirth was an assumed cord accident (tight nuchal cord at birth), we did not have an autopsy done. Joey also had an omphalocele (his abdomen didn't form properly) and a 2 vessel cord, both could have contributed to his death. He was only 5lb2oz at full term birth so clearly there were some growth issues going on as well.

I am not being treated as high risk, though I am seeing my doctors/midwives more frequently now to avoid high blood pressure and also to do NST's (they didn't help with Joey though so I could care less if they do them or not). I am also being induced between 37 and 39wks (depending on which doctor or midwife you ask). I feel high risk though so I was glad that this last doctor I saw decided I need to start being seen more often than every 4 wks finally.

I have learned, from our stillbirth, to trust my instincts more...that doctors don't know everything, especially when it comes to risk and signs of impending fetal death or distress. I have learned that keeping track of kick counts and just being connected to baby are more important than I ever imagined. So thats what I'm trying to do this time...just be constantly aware of this baby in my belly. I'm 32wks now...so into my 3rd trimester...and starting to freak out.

I don't know if you want to join us over at the stillbirth board, but you are more than welcome. We have a few pregnant moms as well as a few who have delivered their rainbow babies these last few months. Its a great place.
Married to my best friend Tom since 2004 (together since 1999)
Mommy to two little boys:
Jamie ~ 7-12-04 ~ fun, crazy, transformer loving tough-guy mama's boy
Joey ~ 4-4-09 ~ born sleeping ~ held under my heart for 40wk1d, in my arms for just 6 short hours but he will be in my heart forever
And finally holding my little girl,Felicity Rose, Born into Daddy's loving hands on June 9, 2010

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April 18th, 2010, 09:14 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 1
Both of my losses have been early - so I don't know. I think often women get monitored more closely at the end of pregnancy when they have had a still birth - but I only get this from listening to others.
Anyway - I'm sorry for your loss! I can't imagine! And welcome here!!!! I hope this is your rainbow baby

Thank you Kiliki for my first beautiful Siggie!

mom of 2 angels and an earth baby
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April 19th, 2010, 08:49 AM
Posts: n/a
Welcome Abie. I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your son and I will be praying that this pregnancy and birth goes perfectly for you. My son was stillborn August 29, 2009 at 26 weeks. I am currently expecting another son due on August 29, 2010. You just have to take it a day at a time and try to remain as positive as possible. I was able to find out the cause of my son's death (I had a virus [CMV] that I contracted while pregnant with him and he also had Trisomy 13 which they say is incompatible with life. I am treated as high risk although I don't think I need to be. Both the CMV and Trisomy 13 are very unlikely to happen again and besides those, I have never had any other complications due to pregnancy in the past. I like to try to do things as natural as possible (no unnecessary tests, no drugs during birth, etc) and luckily I have found an OB who is on board with all those things even though I have the high risk label. I am having more ultrasounds done than usual though just to double check baby is doing well and to give me peace of mind.
Like Kathryn said, feel free to pop on over to the stillbirth board if you would like.
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April 19th, 2010, 10:06 AM
Trish36's Avatar Mom of 4
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 8,606
Welcome Abie and congrats! All my losses were in the first trimester and I can't even imagine losing a chld later on. HUGS! I hope this pregnancy is wonderful and unevenful. Hopefully the dr.s will monitor you closely near the end.

Project 365 - 2012: http://trisha2012.wordpress.com/

Thank you Jaidynsmum for my gorgeous siggy!

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April 19th, 2010, 12:31 PM
baby4me?'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,592
Hi Abie. I am so sorry for the loss of your son. All of my losses have been early on so I don't have any info to share. Just wanted to wish you a happy and healthy 9 months.

Amanda & Rob married June 16, 2006

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April 19th, 2010, 02:19 PM
Mama Chemist 73's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Fort Worth, Texas
Posts: 3,933
Congratulations on you pregnancy. I hope this one goes really well for you. I had a stillborn son at 24wks 3yrs ago. Since then I have had a healthy son and am pregnant with a girl, due June 22. Getting through the angelversaries were really hard and once I passed the 24wk point, I felt better, but that feeling I could lose my baby at any time does creep in on occassion. I forgot to mention that my loss was most likely due to an issue with how the cord was positioned on the placenta or a clot. I was found to have factor V after thatn and have been taking blood thinning shots during pregnancy so I'm monitored a lot. I hope the doctors will monitor you since they did not have a conclusive cause for your son's death.
Sharon - Mom to Theresa, Harvey,& Sarah

My Ovulation Chart
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