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Feeling guilty but feeling so very sick

Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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May 23rd, 2010, 09:49 AM
BigGrin's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 1,684
My last pregnancy I experienced some minor morning sickness. However this pregnancy I have crossed into hyperemesis gravidarum and I am flippin' miserable! I can't keep ANYTHING down, not water, juice, and forget food. The Zofran only works some of the time and I quickly try to eat something nutritious but sometimes that comes up an hour later.

My husband is getting really worried (he's a doc) and frankly I am starting to get a bit scared myself. I am losing weight and I don't have it to lose. I have been sent home early from work because I was just puking into the office trash can and I am not exactly useful during that time. Not even sleep brings me relief as I have to wake during the night to vomit or just retch.

After losing my last pregnancy I feel very guilty about the negative emotions I am getting in this pregnancy. I am getting depressed and can't focus. I should be rejoicing that this pregnancy seems so viable...I mean everytime I throw up means the wee one is digging in for the long haul, right? I hesitated to post this here because it feels wrong to complain to others who've experienced loss. I dunno...anyone BTDT?

I dropped a tear in the ocean, and whenever they find it Iíll stop loving you, only then. ~Unknown
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May 23rd, 2010, 03:28 PM
Gaby&Emmy'sMama's Avatar aka NZ-Emma
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Christchurch, NZ
Posts: 56,618
I'm sorry you're going through this - if you are feeling so bad (physically), I would be inclined to talk to your ob, incase you are getting dehydrated etc.. they may also be able to up your meds, or change them, to something a little stronger


And yes - morning sickness is generally a good sign, BUT it can be hard to feel 'happy' about it, when you're right in the midst of it!! I had m/s with both of my sticky pregnancies (until around 19w with this babe), and i used to feel awful if I complained about it at all..

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May 23rd, 2010, 04:37 PM
martilynne's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Texas
Posts: 12,987
I hope you feel better soon.

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May 24th, 2010, 09:03 AM
Hoping's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 1,977
oh man, that is so miserable!! Morning sickness is so hard. Sometimes i had horrible thoughts like on the way to the doc I would think "well I am going to be devastated if something is wrong with this baby, but at least I would stop throwing up" . Hang in there.

Our Two Miracles!
Alexis Jade 5/28/08 and Evan Russell 6/28/10
Always Remembering our 3 angels in heaven
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May 24th, 2010, 10:26 AM
kellyanne's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Washington
Posts: 1,960
Hopefully Brittanie will see this and respond. I know she has BTDT! And you should not feel bad at all about how you feel....it sounds completely miserable. I hope that this is the worst of it and you start to get better soon as you near the end of your first tri. Hang in there and again, don't feel bad about venting!

3 angels Feb, Mar, Aug of 2008
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May 24th, 2010, 10:44 AM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,573
I did see it! I have gotten hyperemesis with all three of my pregnancies. Unfortunately for me it lasted the entire pregnancy all three times (I really hope that yours tapers off after a while!)

It's so hard not to feel guilty, but I did too. However, being so severely sick is traumatic. There's a HG support forum here on JM, but I don't know how active it is and haven't actually posted there (I didn't find it until the end of my last pregnancy). [edited to add: apparently there isn't a hyperemesis board anymore....too bad]

Do your best to keep hydrated. Dehydration actually makes it worse, so if you can try to keep on top of the liquids, that would be good. And if the Zofran only works part of the time, maybe ask your doctor for something else (there are a couple others) to see if something else works better for you.

It sucks. It really does. I hate being pregnant. But that doesn't mean that I ever didn't love my babies or didn't want them.
Thanks to babydoll213 for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog

Last edited by Brittanie; May 24th, 2010 at 03:46 PM.
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May 24th, 2010, 12:33 PM
trusting and believing
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 811
Don't feel guilty. I know it is difficult to enjoy the pregnancy while you're so sick. I told God I wouldn't complain about my pregnancy, but when the morning sickness truly kicked in I asked if He would please take the edge off. I do truly hope you'll get to feeling better soon so that you can experience the joy of your pregnancy.
Thanking God for a healthy, happy, and BLESSED----->

Mom to one son born December 2010 and expecting another little guy June 16, 2014!
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May 24th, 2010, 06:54 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 1
feel free to vent! part of understanding PAL is understanding that even though we are so thankful for our babies - we still feel like normal grouchy pregnant ladies some of the time too! And the crazy morning sickness - that's just awful. i'm sorry you're going through this!

Thank you Kiliki for my first beautiful Siggie!

mom of 2 angels and an earth baby
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