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Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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May 13th, 2011, 04:35 PM
Sillylittlefishey's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: IL
Posts: 2,852
I told my mom and little sister about the baby over Easter. We told the hubby's family mother's day weekend and I told my babysitter today. I guess I had to ease into telling people since we lost our last baby after I shared the news. I still haven't told my older sister because she always reacts badly and actually disowned me last time and I'm not convinced the stressed she caused me last time didn't contribute to our loss. I won't say she caused it because nobody can know for sure but she didn't help matters. And she gets worse every time so If I could wait and let the baby tell her, I totally would!! I'm also not ready to tell work just yet...I hope my paranoia goes away soon...I'll be 12 weeks on Sunday so maybe once we get through next week and the end of my first trimester, I'll feel better...

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May 13th, 2011, 04:48 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 6,057
Congrats on starting to tell people!!! I remember about your older sister. I think at this point it would be fine to just not tell her until you feel like it. You've got to look out for yourself and not do anything that would stress you out unnecessarily.

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May 13th, 2011, 06:51 PM
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Congrats! So exciting when you get to the point of telling people.
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May 13th, 2011, 07:51 PM
missy123's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Savannah GA
Posts: 13,418
I just told the whole world and anyone that will now listen

I am sorry about your sister, my mom is the same way.

Pregnancy Loss April 2009, September 2010
CP 10/2008, 1/3/11 {missing my babies every single day}Mommy to 4 Children - 3 boys ages 22, 21 and 18 & baby Scarlett
After 2.5 years TTC with 4 losses our Family was given the gift of Miss Scarlett
Do not ever give up hope...

Miss Scarlett... Our miracle girl still brings happy tears to my eyes.

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May 14th, 2011, 10:34 AM
JessP's Avatar Lovin life and family
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Washington
Posts: 22,034
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I am sorry about your sister. I think I remember that and it was terrible. Easing into it sounds like a much better plan . I hope you feel better about it very soon.

Thanks .:Shortcake:. for my great siggie

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May 14th, 2011, 11:48 AM
Sillylittlefishey's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: IL
Posts: 2,852
Thanks everyone!!

Actually for the most part I feel really good about this pregnancy...like it's meant to be and all. It's due around Thanksgiving after all and just a couple weeks after we had our loss. It just feels right. But getting to the first appointment (the loss was the weekend before our 1st appointment) and getting past telling everyone our big milestones and I think once I get passed those two things and see nothing goes wrong afterwords, I'll feel alot better!! I'll be through all those milestones after I finish telling everyone...whenever that will be.

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May 14th, 2011, 12:16 PM
8miraclez's Avatar Formerly Halfbaked
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 7,472
Congrats on starting to tell. I have family like your sister and I didn't tell anyone until after I was 20 weeks. I told most of my family on April Fool's day so a lot of them are still scratching their heads wondering if I was joking or not. I guess they'll know for sure when the baby comes. It does feel good when you can just tell whoever and not worry about who will find out.

To read updates about our baby born with major birth defects, like our Facebook page
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May 14th, 2011, 06:40 PM
ohnicole's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 5,756
How exciting that you started telling people! I agree, tell your sister when you're ready (or just let her figure it out on her own!). I don't understand why people think it's okay to try to control other people's lives
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May 16th, 2011, 05:15 PM
Sillylittlefishey's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: IL
Posts: 2,852
My sister is just super jealous and is one of those woe-is-me types...if she's not happy then nobody should be. It just gets really old always being happy for her but never getting the same in return. I've decided once she does know she'll either get over it or not...but I'm not dealing with the crap. She's disowned me once and if that's the only way to keep my peace of mind...then I'll cut her out of my life until she can grow up and get over it...

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