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Major Rant!!!!

Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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December 16th, 2011, 06:01 PM
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 118

Okay...I have a "friend" who is 17 weeks pregnant. She started wearing maternity clothes literally the day she found out she was pregnant and milks the pregnancy for all it is worth!!! It drives me insane, but I try to suck it up and deal with it because it's her first pregnancy.......

Since she found out she was pregnant, she has been very distant and rude...although my husband says she has always been really rude to me.... A few weeks ago, she came over for the first time in months to tell me all about her baby's bedroom suit that they had ordered (knowing my husband and I have not been able to order our baby's yet ). It seems the only time she comes around is when she has something to brag about. Well during this visit, she was asking me about my pregnancy and weight came up. I told her that so far I had only gained 10 lbs. She made sure to rub in the fact that she had LOST 10 lbs .... (she def looks like she has gained quite a bit, but that's beside the point!!) ....to date, I have only gained 20....yes, I have gained nearly 10 lbs in the last few weeks !!!!

She came back over a week and a half ago to drop something off. She stayed for like 2 minutes. It was the first time that she came over and didn't really brag about what she has or say anything out of the way to me.

Monday, I posted this pic on fb Amber Toothe's Photos | Facebook
(I have no clue why it isn't linking )

She JUST called me to tell me that I look like I have gained 40 lbs since she saw me a week and a half ago!!!!! I said gee thanks! She dropped, but I haven't gained 40 lbs!! She said, well she needs to either come out or go back up!!! Mind you, I am 35 wks 4 days in this picture!!!

I was SPEECHLESS!!! WHO SAYS THAT?!?! What do I say to her? Do I just let it go? Am I being irrational? It really hurt my feelings and struck me wrong!!!! What would you do?!
╰ ☆╮ A Little Faith & A Little Hope╰ ☆╮

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December 17th, 2011, 07:00 AM
lindsey2000k's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 5,966
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I think you look wonderful. You are almost full term and look as you should.
Everyone gaines and losses totally different. It also changed per pregnancy. So far I have not gained anything with this one and still in my regular clothing. With my daughter I was up 14 pounds at this point and in maternity clothing about 10 weeks.

BTW I sent you a friend request

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December 17th, 2011, 07:06 AM
kzoo1280's Avatar Kristin...TTC #1!
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Michigan
Posts: 355
I would try and avoid interacting with her at all costs. What a completely unsupportive "friend." Life seems too short to waste your time with someone like that.

BTW, you look great!

Married May 2009

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December 17th, 2011, 08:43 AM
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 118
Thank you ladies so much!!
╰ ☆╮ A Little Faith & A Little Hope╰ ☆╮

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December 17th, 2011, 08:55 AM
kaylakay's Avatar Love Being A Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Utah
Posts: 1,472
Last time I checked pregnancy isn't a beauty contest? I mean I have more acne then I ever have. I'm bloated. I'm too tired to put makeup on lately. I look like crap. But I dont care because I'm carrying my baby and too me that is all that matters. There is no need to compare weight or anything to other women every pregnancy is different. Who cares if she's lost 10 pounds and who cares if she thinks shes the most beautiful pregnant person in the world. Your carrying a healthy baby and you are rocking that baby bump! Id be loud and proud! She can get over yourself and you need to focus on yourself and your little one that is so close to being here. Good luck.

Forever missing my 3 angel babies. Sep 2010, Nov 2010, Jan 2011
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December 17th, 2011, 09:00 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2011
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 1,364
You look fantastic!!

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December 17th, 2011, 09:31 AM
missy123's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Savannah GA
Posts: 13,418
I would stop taking her phone calls... Seriously.

You look awesome!! I was so much bigger than you are.

It sounds like she is an insecure person that has to "one up you" to try to make herself feel good in some way. ((hugs)) You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

Almost all of Scarlett's furniture and clothes were bought used or hand-me downs - does that make my daughter less of a person than her baby? I.don't.think.so

Have an awesome day.

Pregnancy Loss April 2009, September 2010
CP 10/2008, 1/3/11 {missing my babies every single day}Mommy to 4 Children - 3 boys ages 22, 21 and 18 & baby Scarlett
After 2.5 years TTC with 4 losses our Family was given the gift of Miss Scarlett
Do not ever give up hope...

Miss Scarlett... Our miracle girl still brings happy tears to my eyes.

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December 17th, 2011, 10:57 AM
Pitridge's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Sunny California
Posts: 10,074
I wouldn't bother with her. You look awesome, you have a beautiful belly

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December 17th, 2011, 02:45 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 7,051
Doesn't sound like a very good friend. I'd avoid her.

Either that or start saying mean things about her depriving her baby of nutrients he needs to grow his brain and then express concern that her baby won't be as smart as yours. (I know losing 10 lbs during pregnancy isn't harmful to the baby, but if someone were so rude about my pregnancy I would be very tempted to be rude back.)
Mama to an elementary school boy, kindergarten girl, and my miracle toddler girl.
Three 10w losses (11/2010 + 8/2011 + 10/2014)
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December 17th, 2011, 06:39 PM
Mamacc's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 1,659
Sounds like a real B! It's not a competition...women are supposed to be supportive of each other. She's being downright rude to you! Maybe you should say that she obviously had the extra pounds to spare or she wouldn't have lost it.

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December 17th, 2011, 07:13 PM
TnPhotoMama81's Avatar Wife/Mommy/Photographer
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Location: Oneida, TN
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She sounds jealous or something. Depending on my mood I would be tempted to be rude right back...even though that probably isn't the right thing to do

My Photography Website Pinterest My Etsy Shop
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December 18th, 2011, 06:22 AM
.:Shortcake:.'s Avatar ♬♪Music Soothes my Soul♪♬
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 17,624
I think you look WONDERFUL! Someone like her you do not need in your life. Some people are just unhappy and want to bring you down. You look amazing for being 35 weeks.

My Angels- 12-15-08 @ 13w3d♥ 05-09 @ 6w2d♥ & 2 Early Losses♥ Twins 9-7-10♥ & 10-2-10 ♥ 2/11/11

Expecting my baby boy May 9th
Emergency cerclage put in 12/24

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December 19th, 2011, 11:40 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Delaware (the state!)
Posts: 7,513
I agree with EVERYONE above! You look fantastic and pg is not a competition. My sister kept saying how she only gained 8 lbs the whole pg, but it was because she was so sick the whole time, I would rather gain 40 lbs and feel good the whole time, than only gain 8 because I was so sick the whole time. Maybe she is sick too and doesn't want you to know that and is jealous that you feel good and look healthy!

I would ignore and cut her out of your life, rudeness is not needed, especially when you are enjoying the fact that you are carrying a healthy baby and having to deal with hormones by yourself, without someone adding to that! Bah to her!!
4/2008 8/2011

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December 19th, 2011, 02:53 PM
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 118
Thank you all so much!! I am actually very happy with my weight gain!! And not being sick is pretty awesome....although the last 2 days I have been extremely nauseous. I'm hoping it's my body preparing for the grand arrival of my precious baby!!

I haven't talked to her since that conversation. I am just waiting on her to find out the sex of her baby and start asking for hand-me-downs!!
╰ ☆╮ A Little Faith & A Little Hope╰ ☆╮

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