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Anxiety level is through the roof

Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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February 6th, 2012, 02:56 PM
luvmykids623's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 13,408
Trying to keep the bad thoughts and anxiety under control has been a real challenge especially lately. As we've been getting everything together the thought, "What if we don't wind up needing 2" keeps popping in my head. The thought that one of their hearts could stop at any time is never far from my mind. I've been trying really hard to focus on the positive, but you know how that goes. Today, one of the girls in my DDC (who is a day behind me) found out this morning at an OB appt that her baby's heart stopped beating sometime between last night and this morning. Yesterday she and I were talking on Facebook about what type of cloth diapers she should buy, and today her whole world is devastated. That right there has been and is my biggest fear. My heart breaks for her.

Thank you Jaidynsmum for my beautiful siggy!

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February 6th, 2012, 03:12 PM
missy123's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Savannah GA
Posts: 13,418
I am so sorry.... I am crying for her. I don't even know what to say.

Pregnancy Loss April 2009, September 2010
CP 10/2008, 1/3/11 {missing my babies every single day}Mommy to 4 Children - 3 boys ages 22, 21 and 18 & baby Scarlett
After 2.5 years TTC with 4 losses our Family was given the gift of Miss Scarlett
Do not ever give up hope...

Miss Scarlett... Our miracle girl still brings happy tears to my eyes.

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February 6th, 2012, 03:24 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 865
Lori, I can totally relate. one of my RL friends was a week ahead of me, and she lost her baby in January. It was a week or two of on and off crying for me. I have been constantly thinking of all the "what-ifs" that are so much more prevelant in twins and it just brings me down sometimes. I have often wondered what I would do if I suddenly only had one baby to bring home or even worse, none.

For me, what helps is that there is nothing that I can do. I can monitor thier movements, and eat right, etc. but other then that it's out of my hands. For some reason, it gives me a bit of relief. I also try not to think of them not making it to birth but more of the premature birth aspect. which should be comforting for you to know that once babies make it to 30 weeks thier viability goes up to like 90%+ and 75% have no future complications.

its so hard to be pregnant and see the people who have later term losses. its devistating to say the least and it makes you pray that it never happens to you. keep your head up girly and remember that your dr's are watching you closely.
DH - Matt
DS - Owen 2yrs old (5/28/2009)
Twin Girls - April 23, 2012 (38 weeks)

3 angels (08, 10, 11)
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February 6th, 2012, 03:32 PM
Pitridge's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Sunny California
Posts: 10,074
I'm so sorry for her......

The anxiety is normal, you know someone that just had a lost and it bring all fears of what could happen. I know this might sound mean, but try not to focus on that. Focus on what you need to do to get those babies home. When something like this hits close to home, I try to think that there could off been something wrong with the mother, something that could not be relate to me, it mind sound mean, but it makes me feel better.

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February 6th, 2012, 03:40 PM
*SamF*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 16,621
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I'm so sorry for her loss! It's one of my worst nightmares too.
I think you can only just take it one day at a time and prepare for everything to be perfect.

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February 6th, 2012, 03:42 PM
kaylakay's Avatar Love Being A Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Utah
Posts: 1,472
It is so hard... Late losses always hit me hard. I try to think well how many healthy babies are born compared to how many still births? 99%... That helps me get through. I'm so sorry for her loss. No one deserves to go through that.

Forever missing my 3 angel babies. Sep 2010, Nov 2010, Jan 2011
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February 6th, 2012, 05:30 PM
Mamacc's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 1,659
I know....it's SO hard to see people have late losses and not worry! A girl in my DDC just lost her baby last week at 16 weeks. And my brother and sis in laws best friend just lost their full term baby.

You just have to think that it's really rare and doesnt happen often at all. A lot of people on these DDC have had issues so I think the percentage is higher than normal here... you are getting super close to your due date. It'll be here soon!

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