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Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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  • 1 Post By *SamF*
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March 31st, 2012, 01:58 AM
kaylakay's Avatar Love Being A Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Utah
Posts: 1,472
Okay ladies so please don't judge me. I already feel childish and dumb for feeling like this and I just can't seem to shake it.

So I have been having EXTREME paranoia lately. Not only with just my baby but with everything. For instance today I walk outside to my car and there is a guy sitting in his car, on his laptop and just sitting there. I freaked out! DH and I were heading to a college volleyball game and I wouldnt stop bringing up that guy! I was like "I should of called the cops." "Why was he just sitting there staring?" "Do you think he's stalking us or someone?" "Will he break in?" etc. It was so bad. Well I dwelled on it all night... So bad to point I just had a very vivid nightmare about someone breaking into my apartment. I woke up shaking. DH was really worried so he said lets go on the couch and watch a funny movie till you feel better. That explains why I'm writing this at 1:52 am.

Anyway the point is this is always happening to me! I'm always worried about getting hurt, I'm always worried about someone breaking in, I worry about DH an my family, I worry about my pregnancy. All I do is worry worry worry! I have always kinda been a paranoid person but not nearly this bad. I don't think before I'd ever sit there and dwell on something ALL night.

Could this be pregnancy related? I know of depression but extreme paranoia? Anyone else's experiences would be awesome... I'm contemplating seeing a counselor maybe once cause I feel they could help me come up with a solution? I don't know. I'm really looking for anything.

And once again please don't judge me... I'm really embarrassed by this. I feel this is childish and I should be able to control my imagination.

Forever missing my 3 angel babies. Sep 2010, Nov 2010, Jan 2011
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March 31st, 2012, 06:09 AM
*SamF*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I think talking to your doctor and seeing a counselor is a great idea. Dealing with that level of anxiety isn't good for you. Hormones in pregnancy can really heighten emotions, do since you always have this to a degree it makes sense that pregnancy makes it worse.
Hugs! It's not childish, it's good to get things that are bothering you out!
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March 31st, 2012, 06:51 AM
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I agree about the anxiety. Also, you need to be carefiul, because when you have the baby, you will be more likely to develop PPD. You should probably talk to your OB.
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March 31st, 2012, 07:11 AM
missy123's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Savannah GA
Posts: 13,418
Do not ever feel embarrassed or ashamed to post things here. This is what we are here for - to help each other. Are you having panic attacks as well? During my pregnancy I had an unusual amount of panic attacks and it had nothing to do with the baby. My doctor thought it was due to the shift in hormones due to my age combined with the physical stress my body went through.

While what you are going through sounds kind of extreme I am sure you are not the only person to ever have this happen. Please call your doctor tomorrow, you need to be seen and evaluated. A girl I know was bi-polar on top of it all and the doctor determined (along with therapy) that medicine was the best route to go. They have to weigh the risk of the meds vs. the risk your stress/anxiety is causing.

(((hugs))) If I lived near you I would give you a big hug sweetie!!

... and I will say it again. Do not be embarrassed, it is better you get it out than harbor these feelings inside.

Pregnancy Loss April 2009, September 2010
CP 10/2008, 1/3/11 {missing my babies every single day}Mommy to 4 Children - 3 boys ages 22, 21 and 18 & baby Scarlett
After 2.5 years TTC with 4 losses our Family was given the gift of Miss Scarlett
Do not ever give up hope...

Miss Scarlett... Our miracle girl still brings happy tears to my eyes.

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March 31st, 2012, 09:32 AM
Nayomi80's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 6,202
I am seeing a counselor since I was 18 weeks pregnancy
for anxiety over pregnancy and everything else in my life
and I would highly recommend to you, seeing a counselor
that is also able to mentally evaluate you, to make sure
its not just emotional (but maybe mental too) so that you
know that you are not alone in what you are going through,
I took down all of the pictures out of my pregnancy journal
because I do not want anyone stalking me (it probally
doesnt help that I was going through a phase of watching
this show called "Stalked" on I.D. channel. and another
show "I survived"......things like that cause its
negative and being pregnant we need to be surrounded with
positivity and support. One last thing I dont know about you,
but I have a high instinct to just want to protect my baby,
like my Maternal instinct is kicked into high gear with this
pregnancy.... Congrats to making it to 3rd trimester ( :
I am right there behind you. But yeah I hope you find
the answers that you are looking for, and find away to
be calm, cause our babies need that.
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March 31st, 2012, 09:51 AM
geogeek's Avatar Marsi's Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: In yonder mountains
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Definitely don't feel embarrassed. I am a very anxious person naturally. I am one that if stopped at stop lights and there is someone on the sidewalk I make sure I lock the doors and roll up the windows. It has taken a bit of time, strategies and medication to help me through it. For me, I was able to get off of medications about 2 weeks ago and I really have to use the strategies to keep my anxiety under control. Seeing a doctor is a good thing. It took years of anxiety attacks for me to go to the doctor. I got really sick and needed a colonoscopy and was absolutely terrified of going under because of the absolute loss of control. That one was enough that I was seen by an emergency psychologist to work out the paranoia. It is good that you are recognizing that it is more than normal paranoia. The first step is to recognize there is an issue. Good luck with everything. I hope that you find out what works for you to be able to help get it under control.

Thank you *kiliki* for my beautiful siggy!

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March 31st, 2012, 05:02 PM
JessP's Avatar Lovin life and family
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We are always here for you so don't feel embarrassed or bad. I agree with talking to your dr and seeing a counselor. Both can help you to start to feel better. You don't need the stress.

Thanks .:Shortcake:. for my great siggie

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March 31st, 2012, 05:17 PM
dreamer10's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Utah
Posts: 2,084
I think everyone else is right...extreme anxiety forsure. Talk to your doctor, as I am sure your not the only pregnant mom with anxiety in his/her office! They might be able to prescribe something that's safe during pregnancy, but will help. I know during my 9th pregnancy I hit a little boy with my car and sent him to the hospital via Lifeflight, and for the following two weeks I had to take a unisom every night so I could sleep. It helped a lot. Don't feel bad....things are just hard for us moms after so many loses....
The adventures of raising a big family....Life, love and family in the Sock Bin! www.thesockbin.blogspot.com

Our rainbow baby Brynlee Sue was born August 17th after four heartbreaking loses! Life is an amazing journey. Hang on, keep your faith and try to always move forward!
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April 2nd, 2012, 10:07 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Delaware (the state!)
Posts: 7,513
As Missy said, do NOT feel embarrassed about this. You are definitely not the only person that experiences this. And I agree that seeing a counselor would be a very good idea. My cousin's wife was dealing with some issues before pregnancy, after she had her babies, she had very, very extreme paranoia, to the point where she didn't want to leave the house for fear her children would come into harm's way. She finally found a doctor that was able to diagnose and treat her and not only is she a much happier (and social person), but her kids are too. It is never a bad thing to ask for help when you feel it is out of your control.

Big HUGS and I hope you find the support you need!
4/2008 8/2011

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April 2nd, 2012, 12:53 PM
.:Shortcake:.'s Avatar ♬♪Music Soothes my Soul♪♬
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 17,624
Originally Posted by *SamF* View Post
I think talking to your doctor and seeing a counselor is a great idea. Dealing with that level of anxiety isn't good for you. Hormones in pregnancy can really heighten emotions, do since you always have this to a degree it makes sense that pregnancy makes it worse.
Hugs! It's not childish, it's good to get things that are bothering you out!
Anxiety is not just a pregnancy related issue and there can be underlying issues. It never hurts to talk to your doctor and see a therapist. I hope you can get some help with it and sometimes you need medication for it. It's never good to keep that bottled up inside.

My Angels- 12-15-08 @ 13w3d♥ 05-09 @ 6w2d♥ & 2 Early Losses♥ Twins 9-7-10♥ & 10-2-10 ♥ 2/11/11

Expecting my baby boy May 9th
Emergency cerclage put in 12/24

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April 2nd, 2012, 01:07 PM
Pitridge's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Sunny California
Posts: 10,074
I would also talk to your doctor about it. Also, don't feel embarrass about asking anything, we are here for each other. HUGS.

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