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Toddler and a baby?

Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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  • 2 Post By LindseyE117

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November 15th, 2012, 11:17 PM
kaylakay's Avatar Love Being A Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Utah
Posts: 1,472
So... DH and I are starting to plan out when to start TTC again...

We are considering when Ava turns 1 or shortly after Ava turns 1. So she will be closer to 2 when the baby is born...

I want more children and I love Ava to death... But is it bad I'm terrified of having a toddler and a baby? Ava takes up so much of my time... I just can't imagine what it's going to be like with a baby and a toddler... Am I over thinking this? Any insight to mamas with young kids and babies would be awesome! Ha

Forever missing my 3 angel babies. Sep 2010, Nov 2010, Jan 2011
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November 16th, 2012, 05:10 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 2,259
My kids are 18 months apart and i will admit that was rough for the first few weeks. As my DS got closer to 2 and my DD was about 3 months things really settled down for us. I think trying after your daughter is 1 sounds perfect. There is a very big difference between 1 and 18 months, you will be shocked at how different it will be. Im pregnant with my 3rd and my kids will be 4.5 and almost 3 when the baby is born. Im so happy for you, planning for another baby is so much fun. Please keep us updated, i cant wait to hear about your journey.
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November 16th, 2012, 06:49 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Delaware (the state!)
Posts: 7,513
Reagan was a little over 2 when we decided to go for #2, she was 3 and 3 months when Addy was born, which I found perfect, because she was potty trained, so 1 in diapers, she can do a bunch of things on her own, although still wants me to help her. That being said, I know many people who have kids that are about 2 years apart and they don't seem to have any problems So exciting!!
4/2008 8/2011

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November 16th, 2012, 06:53 AM
melissalaw's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 14,409
Jackson was almost 3 when Jacob was born and he was also potty trained which made it really nice to only have one in diapers. It was hard in the very beginning especially when I would try to nurse Jacob and Jackson would want my attention but once we got on a schedule I learned how to balance my time between both kids, making sure that I always had time to spend with Jackson. you'll figure it out once you have another one and you will make it work.

Thank you *Kiliki* for my beautiful siggy
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November 16th, 2012, 06:57 AM
AimeeD041727's Avatar PowerPuffGirls
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: PA
Posts: 1,898
It's busy but you will get the hang of it. My first two are 18 months apart and my middle daughter and my youngest are 2 1/2 years apart. It is really worth it when you see them together. My girls have become best friends.

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November 16th, 2012, 08:34 AM
Belita's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 12,105
We're planning on the same age difference. I think it sounds like a good difference.

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November 18th, 2012, 07:41 PM
LindseyE117's Avatar Wookie's Girl
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 3,741
My first 2 are 17 months apart and I was a single mom when I had them. I was terrified of how difficult it would be, but it was easier than I thought it would be. However, I'd never have them that close again on purpose. Lol.
missy123 and TnPhotoMama81 like this.

Thank you Shortcake for my beautiful siggy!
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November 19th, 2012, 10:17 AM
ashj_1218's Avatar Hiya!
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 11,971
L and K are 22 months apart. K and baby #3 are going to be 19 months apart. We did both on purpose.

I don't think a baby and a toddler is really that difficult. I found adjusting to Liam alone (going from 0 to 1 child) to be WAY harder than going from 1 to 2 children, even when the first was rather young. Yes, there was a few weeks of tough adjustments. Liam had some jealousy and wasn't sure about the baby. He acted up. But he was also more independent than you can imagine with her only being 5 months. The walking, self-entertaining, self-feeding, often sleeping through the night, etc makes a big difference in the amount of constant care that they need. I think the first 8 months are the hardest in terms of physical care. They require so much. Ava will need less constant care by the time she is 18 months old. She will be more trying emotionally, since you have to deal with tantrums, wanting to do things herself, and will need to keep up with her (which can be tiring). But it really is a different kind of care when they are toddlers (and that just keeps evolving). I am not saying you can easily just let her alone and handle the baby, but your time does get split differently and it wasn't as hard as I thought in the beginning. It was harder with two around 4 months, since Kieran didn't sleep all the time any more and I had to learn to balance toddler needs and baby needs, since they both had them. But you learn what works really quick. I am not terribly worried about adding a third. It will be another adjustment, but I know I can handle it.
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November 24th, 2012, 01:41 PM
MeggysMommy's Avatar 3 + 1
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Oregon
Posts: 10,202
I'm a little bit afraid of how Megan will react when this one is born because she has all the attention now.
Cay wife to David mom to Megan 10/01/2010 and April 7/14/2013

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November 24th, 2012, 05:36 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Montana
Posts: 3,688
That's the time frame that we're planning too Kayla and I'm a little nervous about it as well. We're a little older and don't want to wait too long, just in case we want more than two. Plus my siblings and I were really close and it was great. I don't want Irish twins, but anything after that I'll be okay with. Ideally we'll get pregnant again when Regan is about nine months...

Watching my 18 month old niece as she goes and goes and imagining having one of those and being pregnant or having a newborn makes me exhausted and wonder about how we'll survive it!

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November 25th, 2012, 09:36 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 6,057
M will have just turned 2 when this one is born. She is really exhausting right now and I almost wish I had waited longer just because it has been very difficult for me to get through the first tri with a 17-18 month old who is teething all her canines and back molars at once, having disgusting poopy diapers multiple times a day, not very verbal yet so can't tell me what she wants much of the time, etc. I think we will leave a bit more of a spacing for TTC #3. But I am told that the difference between 18 months and age 2 is vast and I am hopeful it will not be a super tough transition. I plan to get her excited for the baby by having her own baby doll with a doll carrier and all that.

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