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Could use some advice...

Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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January 21st, 2013, 01:53 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Montana
Posts: 3,688
Hi ladies...

First off... quick update on us - we're doing great! Regan is growing like a weed... We have our next check up tomorrow, but I'm expecting that she'll be around 12 pounds. She'll be six weeks old on Thursday and I can't believe how fast time is going! We're really loving having her and it's been so good to have her completely healthy and off the oxygen...

Now for my question... I have my six week exam tomorrow and fully expect to get the all clear to DTD. I know not everyone waits, but for some reason I'm a bit nervous because of the surgery. I've never had surgery before and it's been weird for me to deal with. My body and I are still coming to terms with Regan's birth and our new state of being. But I miss that part of my relationship with DH and he's so excited, and has been SO patient and wonderful, that I'll deal and we'll be resuming this week.

But birth control is a little bit of an issue... I'm exclusively breast feeding and am still slightly spotting. I pumped for a few days in the hospital, but stopped as soon as Regan could take the breast. I'm planning to start pumping again in the next couple of weeks to build a freezer stash and introduce a bottle. I have a history of blood clots, so hormonal birth control is problematic. We got pregnant the first time when we were using condoms and sponges. Plus we both HATE condoms and they have a tendency to not stay in place for us for some reason. IUDs scare me. We want to start TTC our second when Regan is 9 to 12 months old, so I don't want anything that will affect my cycles hugely or be a big deal to reverse. I have a call in to the OB to discuss and right now the mini pill seems like it might be the best option for me. We're planning to have DH snipped when we're done having kids...

So lots of rambling to basically ask for advice on the whole bc issue and if anyone has similar experiences and what you used... TIA!!

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January 21st, 2013, 02:15 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 2,259
Yeah! Im so glad your all doing so well! Go Regan and go Mommy!

I also cant use hormonal birth control. I used the copper iud and i loved it! I had no issues and my dh never noticed it. It is effective imediatly and lets you get back to your natural cycle. After i had my first ( he was an emergency c section) i had alot of trouble dealing with my.body being so different, i wish i had used the iud then and let my body naturaly recover. I fully plan on getting it again after i have this baby.

So there is my opinion but there ate lots of options and if you look around you will find something that is perfect for you guys.
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January 21st, 2013, 02:22 PM
melissalaw's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 14,409
So glad that both you and Regan are doing great. I've missed you around here.

After my first child was born I went on the mini pill and it didn't affect my milk supply at all and I didn't get pregnant until after I went off the mini pill so for me it worked great. This time I haven't been on any kind of birth control, just breastfeeding and we haven't gotten pregnant. Now my dr doesn't recommend it for birth control but for us this time it's working great. Good Luck. I felt alot like you when we were getting ready to DTD the first time after my babies were born. Just take it slow. for me the first few times were no fun at all, but were mainly for DH's benefit. After a while it stopped hurting and I began enjoying it again.

Thank you *Kiliki* for my beautiful siggy
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January 22nd, 2013, 08:36 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Delaware (the state!)
Posts: 7,513
Yay for a growing baby! So glad you all are doing well

As for BC, I think you got great advice here and your doctor will be able to discuss options too. I went with the IUD and have loved it, as soon as they remove it, you are safe to TTC right away, which was great for me! This is the 2nd time I have had it btw. I have Mirena, but there are others out there like Paragard that don't have hormones in them. However, the IUD is not for everyone, so discuss it with your doctor and find out what he/she thinks or recommends for you.

As for DTD, take it slow, the first time isn't necessarily fun and if you need to stop, by all means, stop. I had to the first time after my Reagan was born, this time we took it a lot slower and that was much better. Just talk to DH and explain to him that the first time may not be so great for you and that you may have to stop/take it really slow/etc.
4/2008 8/2011

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January 24th, 2013, 06:28 PM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Pacific NW
Posts: 6,913
After DS I used the mini pill, I liked that just fine. I believe it did mess with my periods just a bit, as far as making them a bit lighter and lasted a couple of days longer. But we don't like condoms either, and also I tried the Mirena IUD last year and we didn't like it. The "string" is made of metal, and despite the doctor bending it to curve around and away from my cervix, DH would still get poked with the cut end very often when DTD. He said it did NOT feel good and no amount of me rearranging the string would make it stay in place, I pretty much had to move it out of the way every time we wanted to have sex and even then it would drift back into the way of things. I had it taken out a few months later.
I think the mini pill sounds like the best option for you, unless you want to closely track your cycles and use NFP, although that can be hard with breastfeeding. Remember breastfeeding is not 100% safe, you can still ovulate even if you don't have a period.
I hope your first time back in the sack goes ok for you! I recall our first one being a bit uncomfortable as well but it got better.

Little Bud: Blooming in Heaven 1.24.12
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