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Did the worry stop as soon as baby was born?

Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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  • 1 Post By melissalaw
  • 1 Post By Happy Song

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March 27th, 2013, 06:15 AM
lindsey2000k's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Ohio
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Those of you with your rainbows now did you stop worrying after baby came?

After Madison for some reason I had a calm over me and never really worried. I am always feeling to make sure Bryson is breathing and checking on him.

Well the other night I got a big scare. I was nursing him to sleep in my bed and when he is asleep I lay there for a few minute to make sure he is sound asleep before attempting to move him. He made this weezy type noise and then I did not hear anything. He is a heavy breather and a snorer. I laid my hand on his chest and OMG he was not breathing.... so I shook him. He gasped and took a really hard breath screamed out crying then went right back to sleep.

Ok so now I am freaking out. If I was not a co sleeper and had just stuck him in his crib for the night like a lot of people do would I have lost my baby that night?

So for me the worry has not ended. He is almost a year old and I still have a strong urge to check on him all the time.

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March 27th, 2013, 08:44 AM
Leanne78's Avatar Nov 2012 DDC Co-Host
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 9,498
The worry has not ended for me. I'm always checking on her to make sure she is still breathing. I worry non-stop about both of my girls. If anything ever happened to either of them, I would pretty much need to be admitted. It's my biggest fear.

Last edited by Leanne78; March 27th, 2013 at 09:39 AM.
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March 27th, 2013, 09:22 AM
geogeek's Avatar Marsi's Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: In yonder mountains
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Nope. It didn't end for me. Actually, right after she was born, it caused so much anxiety I had to be medicated. It is better now, but I have the monitor in her room close enough to hear her breathe. It is still one of my biggest fears.

Thank you *kiliki* for my beautiful siggy!

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March 27th, 2013, 10:25 AM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Pacific NW
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I haven't had my rainbow baby yet, but wanted to say yikes! What a scare, Lindsey! I know even before I had a loss that I was a little paranoid with DS when he was first born. How scary for you!
I've thought about buying one of those Angel Care monitors that lets you know when they stop breathing.

Little Bud: Blooming in Heaven 1.24.12
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March 27th, 2013, 12:30 PM
melissalaw's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 14,409
I don't think the worrying will ever end. that's just your parental instinct. I don't worry as much now that Jacob is going to stop breathing but I do check on him every night before I go to bed and then I check on him if I get up to use the bathroom in the middle of the night. But I still check on my 3 year old so I don't know if I will ever stop checking on them. And who know the worry we will feel when they get older and start driving. I can't even imagine..lol.
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Thank you *Kiliki* for my beautiful siggy
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March 27th, 2013, 06:34 PM
fromustobaby's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 8,583
Maiya slept with me for the first 8 months...I had my hand on her chest every night...now, she is in her crib, and usually wakes once a night to eat/get changed...the few times that she has slept through the night, I've woken in a panic and gone to check on her...I do feel better now that she is older...

How scary about Bryson!

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March 29th, 2013, 08:31 AM
missy123's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Savannah GA
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I never worried with my boys... The thought of something real bad happening to them never even crossed my mind. Even when my oldest had sleep apena and had to be on a monitor I never really worried.

Loss changes your whole state of mind. I am calmer these past couple of months but I would literally wake up with night terrors thinking that Scarlett had died. She still sleeps in the same room with us as I just need her close.

((Hugs)) I am glad we have each other!!

Pregnancy Loss April 2009, September 2010
CP 10/2008, 1/3/11 {missing my babies every single day}Mommy to 4 Children - 3 boys ages 22, 21 and 18 & baby Scarlett
After 2.5 years TTC with 4 losses our Family was given the gift of Miss Scarlett
Do not ever give up hope...

Miss Scarlett... Our miracle girl still brings happy tears to my eyes.

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March 29th, 2013, 01:28 PM
Happy Song's Avatar Nicole
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 11,023
I calmed down when they are about a year old... at least about sleeping. Then you worry about accidents, drowning, and whatnot.
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April 2nd, 2013, 11:56 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Delaware (the state!)
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Worrying for me doesn't stop. I check on both girls (4 and 9 months) every night before I go to bed, I am calmer in the middle of the night about it, unless I hear odd noises or something like that.

I have an Angel Care monitor, they are great, but they can be a little more sensitive and give you a scare when there isn't a reason for it. However, I would rather that than the other way.
4/2008 8/2011

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April 4th, 2013, 12:14 AM
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 133
oh my ! what a scare glad your little one is ok ,i worry all the time for that very reason my husband stops breathing in his sleep and i worry about that with sophia shes still in a bassinet beside my bed i cant pair to put her in her room even though the hubby say its time
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