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When are you/were you most anxious?

Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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January 11th, 2007, 06:35 PM
Gaby&Emmy'sMama's Avatar aka NZ-Emma
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Christchurch, NZ
Posts: 56,618
I'm once again curious .... when were or are you most anxious, during your pregnancy???? I know we are all anxious a lot of the time, but is there a particular event, time of day, etc etc that makes you really anxious?

For me the worst worst worst days were the days of my midwife appointments, once we had started listening to the heartbeat. The most terrifying thing I could imagine going through, would be losing a baby after the 1st trimester (my m/c was 5w4d) - I kept having these visions of trying to find the h/b, but not being able to - and then finding out i'd lost the baby.....

I also HATED the two or three days before a scan, once again, terrified that i'd find I'd lost the baby and didn't know it... I could never ever look at the U/S screen during my first two scans (12w5d & 19w1d) until the sonographer had mentioned the h/b...... My 39w0d scan I was fine, because Gaby was kicking me to bits before we went in lol

I think the further on I got in the pregnancy, I became a different sort of scared - I knew I would be heartbroken if I experienced a m/c, but once I got past the stage where she would be viable outside the womb.... then I knew I would be just devestated, and couldn't imagine how I could go on after experiencing such a loss....

that wasn't helped when at 38w I went to the GP because i'd been feeling dizzy and had some numbness in my left side - and the GP couldn't find Gaby's h/b! Got sent up to the hospital & my backup midwife put me on the CTG machine & thank goodness found the h/b straight away.......

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January 11th, 2007, 07:58 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: New Jersey
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In the beginning of my pregnancy because of our 3 losses I had u/s's done every Wednesday at the specialist and every week on Tuesday I was NOT pleasant to be around. I always feared the worse and was so anxious until it was over. After my weekly u/s's ended it was really during the day when I would be at my desk and wonder why I didnt feel him moving.

<span style="color:#333399">JACK MATTHEW BORN NOVEMBER 25TH AT 4:39PM WEIGHING 7LBS 11OZ, 20.5 INCHES

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January 11th, 2007, 08:30 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: pennsylvania
Posts: 982
i don't know what it is going to be for me this time around. i'm kind of thinking the belly checks/ultra sounds. both of my later losses were very different. 1st my water broke and then the 2nd was no h/b at 17.5 week belly check. the second one really took my by surprise, it would anybody, but it was the last thing i had expected. i had my kids there with me, which i will never do again. as stupid as it sounds, i just never expected there not to be a h/b. and the odd thing was this was the first pregnancy that i had a h/b monitor. i just rented it for fun,knowing this would be our last child and wanted a toy.


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January 12th, 2007, 05:14 AM
Daniellea22's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: New Jersey
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right now for me its the waiting game and lack of symptoms..one minute im confident and the next im preparing myself. I think up until i feel movement i will worry, i want to rent a doppler but ill be a nut case if i cant find the hb one day so i dont know what to do. My last 2 losses were from problems at conception so maybe if i can get to my first u/s and see a heartbeat, ill feel alot better.
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January 12th, 2007, 06:03 AM
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My worst times are the mornings of my appointments. My mind just starts racing with all the problems that could possibly happen.

I'm sure after I make it past the first trimester, then I'll start worrying that there is something wrong with the baby. I'm probably not going to do the quad-screen because of all the extra anxiety as well as the high rate of false positives for this reason.
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January 12th, 2007, 06:48 AM
**Jenn**'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: NJ
Posts: 11,433
For me it's the whole first trimester with it being worse the days leading up to an appointment. After the first trimester I feel a little better until appointment time again. I'm a nervous wreck until the stage the baby starts moving consistently. Of course then I'm a nervous wreck if I don't feel the baby for a few hours--so of course I poke my belly and eat/drink something sweet and then feel bad because I woke the baby up. Plus it didn't help last time that my mil would constantly ask me how did I know the baby was ok and how did I know the cord wasn't wrapped around his neck strangling him. She better keep her mouth shut this time!
Our angel baby forever missed--1/3/03

Ailish Laura born October 20th, 2012.
8lbs 12oz and 20.75 inches

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January 12th, 2007, 07:00 AM
ypperin's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Vancouver Canada
Posts: 1,342
I was nervous right up to the 20 u/s - every appointment was horribly nerve wracking - but now it looks all good, and my lil guy makes sure to kick me quite frequently which has set my mind at ease.

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January 12th, 2007, 08:27 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Midwest
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The first trimester was rough for me. Thankfully my doc brought me in for frequent checks and an u/s every visit. My worst appointment was the one to find the h/b. My doc was delivering so I had to wait an hour or so in the u/s room waiting for another doc to come check. That was also the one appointment DH couldn't go to, so by the time the doc came in I was a wreck. It's gotten better each time and feeling this one kick so much has helped a lot. I do get a bit worried when I realize I haven't felt him for a while, so I'll do like newbaby2006 and do something to get him moving. Lots of times I can just say a prayer asking for some reassurance. Often times before I say Amen, the little guy is kicking the fire out of my bladder.
Do not sorrow; the joy of the Lord is your strength." Neh. 8:10
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January 13th, 2007, 05:14 AM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,573
As anxious as I am right before my appointments...I don't think I've hit the worst of it yet. I didn't lost Cora until 38w1d, and everything was perfect right up until then. So, yes, appointments have me anxious, but...

I dreamed this morning that I was at the hospital, being induced for this one. I had the h/b monitor around my belly, but I couldn't hear the h/b (I don't know if you even can with those monitors during labor...never had need for one since we already knew Cora was gone before I was induced with her so there was no point in using one.)

They kept telling me the baby was fine, and I was going to take this one home, but I didn't believe them. I kept thinking SOMETHING was going to happen.

So now it's 5:14 am and I've been awake for 2 hours...
Thanks to babydoll213 for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog

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January 14th, 2007, 05:56 PM
ericahex's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,241
The most stressful moments of all were the ultrasounds. I had one at 10w1d, one at 20w2d. I had just seen so many ultrasounds with a tiny unmoving embryo or, with the last loss, nothing but "products of conception". I had been told "oh well maybe you aren't as far along as you thought" even though I had known better.

At each ultrasound at first I couldn't believe what I was seeing, and when I did I was shocked and delighted and tearing up.
Mama to Monkey born Feb 24th, 2007, and Toddler born Nov 1st, 2005.
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January 14th, 2007, 09:49 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 18,680
So far my worse time is right now. I'm waiting for my 1st u/s on Tuesday and I'll almost be 8 weeks. I've never had a good experience at an u/s and always found out bad news, so I'm praying that things are okay and there's a healthy heartbeat. I know I'll calm down a bit once I get the reassuring news. Until then...I'm going nuts waiting!
Thank you Claire1977 for my adorable siggy
For the special little one in your life!
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January 14th, 2007, 11:27 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,573
so I'm praying that things are okay and there's a healthy heartbeat[/b]
I'm praying for you too honey!
Thanks to babydoll213 for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog

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