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Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss


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December 18th, 2007, 09:36 AM
prush02's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 476
Ok.. so I am so stinkin ready for Max to be here. Christmas time is hard enough not having Jack here and thinking he would be 2.5 years old and loving Christmas.... and getting all those lovely "family" portrait Christmas Cards in the mail. I don't know why I have such a hard time with those. Anyhoo... I feel like poo. The nauseau has returned, headaches, back pain, and contractions... they are never consistent,but very painful and usually at about 2 am, so I am tired from not sleeping. I'm grumpy and moody and just overall in a bad mood 24/7. Is this any form of normal?

Then the guilt kicks in...I should just be happy to be pregnant right! I mean, that is how I felt for the one month I wasn't pregnant. I would have done anything just to have been pregnant! But geez I have been pregnant since Nov. 2007, miscarriage, off one cycle, and preggo again. A HORMONAL NIGHTMARE. I feel like I have been pregnant and hormonal for over a year!

thanks Duckie for my siggie
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December 18th, 2007, 09:49 AM
tiffani76541's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Killeen, Tx
Posts: 1,004
Heck yeah it's normal!It's hard being pregnant for so long!Even just the 9 months of one pregnancy is alot. You're heavier, tired, and constantly uncomfortable or in pain. Sure you're thankful to be pregnant, but that doesn't mean you have to be smiley and glowy and chipper 24/7!You've gone through a lot, and I know what you mean about the holidays...it's going to be super hard,especially next year with Austin being able to be more excited about Christmas.The last month is not easy.But the last 3 weeks is going to go by quick, I promise!It doesn't seem like it now, but once it's over, it will seem like it was just a blink of an eye. You deserve to feel anyway you want!Only a few more weeks!
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December 18th, 2007, 01:26 PM
Gaby&Emmy'sMama's Avatar aka NZ-Emma
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Christchurch, NZ
Posts: 56,618
Then the guilt kicks in...I should just be happy to be pregnant right![/b]
hunny - you know & we know that you ARE happy to be pregnant, excited about Max's arrival in 3 weeks (omg!)... BUT you're also a NORMAL HEAVILY PREGNANT WOMAN!!!

I don't think i've spoken to anyone who enjoys the last few weeks of pregnancy - heck, even the last trimester of pregnancy! You are uncomfortable, it probably hurts to sit, hurts to stand, hurts to be on your knees, hurts to be in bed, hurts to be out of bad.... on top of that you've got a baby digging into all your internal organs, your back is probably sore, your hips are probably sore, your legs are probably sore.. you are probably in and out of the toilet all day... and then as you mentioned you've got nausea. And on top of all that physical discomfort, you ARE very hormonal right now!!!!

I think women deserve a huge medal (possibly made of never ending chocolate?) for all that we go through during pregnancy - right from the first trimester, through to the birth. Pregnancy IS lovely, it's so nice knowing that you have a little bub growing inside your belly - BUT it is also a total pain in the butt at times (and sometimes quite literally!!!)

We love you, so please vent to us as often as you need to over the next three weeks.... Trust me, by the time I got to 35 weeks I was just plain OVER IT... and then Gaby didn't make her grand arrival until I was 42w0d.... I know how much that last while can drag... does drag.

Regarding missing Jack... that is also very normal hun. Although all of my losses were early in the pregnancy (before the 2nd trimester), I miss all of my angels at this time of the year, and even though I never saw any of my babies (properly...) I too get upset when I see the family portrait-ness of the Christmas season... and I *have* a child.. it still upsets me. Even looking at mine & Gaby's photo, I couldn't help but think about the 5 year old that should be holding Gaby on his lap, or the little belly that I should be developing..........

Do you have a calendar that you can do a big countdown on? Cross off each day with a very bright, eye catching cross, decorate the date that Max is making his arrival.. it might help you to focus on how close his arrival is, and that the days are indeed passing!!!!

Love you girl!

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December 18th, 2007, 08:56 PM
Posts: n/a
guess what??? your normal!!!!! i have 13 days left to go i have back pain and hip pain and my tumm feels like its gonna burst open and headaches and oh i love this one rls (restless leg syndrom) and cant get comfy enough at night to sleep more than about an hour at a time and i too am having bouts of morning sickness too.... so i understnad and completely feel for you hun! soon baby max will be here and this will alll be a distnat memory!
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December 19th, 2007, 07:06 AM
dinamommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 11,610
Yeah, I'm feeling a little "done" too, but we just have to be patient I guess. It's so normal to feel uncomfortable in the end of your pregnancy. I know that 3 weeks must feel like an eternity to you, but it will be here before you know it!

I'm sorry you're missing your precious Jack so much right now. It's totally understandable for you to feel so very sad.


Baby and little girls' leg warmers: http://www.etsy.com/shop/SassyStitchesStacey

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December 19th, 2007, 07:14 AM
Sabina's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,657
Wow I am feeling the exact same way! I really miss Hannah right now and Christmas is so hard since this is when we told everyone last time. I also feel that guilt that I should be happy with what I have been given and the baby I have growing now but I also think she would 4 months right now and it would be such a special time with her first Christmas.

I am also sick of being pregnant and I am only 17 weeks!!! I have been pregnant for over a year with all the m/c's. It is so hard being like this for so long and I still have so long to go.

I know it's hard but try to hang in there for 3 more weeks. It won't be long until you have your little one in your arms. And if you are sad during Christmas make sure you take some to yourself to cry and feel the way you want. I know it's so hard with all the family stuff when you are not feeling emotionally well.
Thank you Jaidynsmum for the beautiful siggy
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