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Forum: Traditional Parenting


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December 29th, 2005, 05:51 PM
~Casey~'s Avatar GraceNorraJennaMomma
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Central Illinois
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Do you ever regret choosing the more traditional parenting methods? I have friends that have practiced attatchment parenting for their first children, and felt adament about not doing it again. My friend is amazed that my daughter takes naps without me sleeping next to her or that ahe sleeps in her own bed at night. She and her husband have all but divorced over her son being in the bed with them, but her three year old is having huge rejection issues with being put into his own bed. I can't see making your child feel rejected like that being a healthy thing and neither does she. That is why she said that she will NOT do it again. I have only heard of parents wishing they had not started all of the habits that go along with ap, not the other way around. I was just wondering if anyone wished that they had tried ap instead. While I was prego I was leaning more toward the ap style of parenting and now that real life has set in I am happy to be heading down this road instead. I feel like my marriage is healthier because of it. Not that it is like that for everyone, but.... what do you think?
"I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out there isn't, than live my life as if there isn't and find out there is."
Casey(29) DH, Arron(31)DD, Grace(3) DD, Norra(2) DD, Jenna(8Mo.)

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December 29th, 2005, 09:02 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 8,385
I never co-slept with my older 3, but did with my last 2.
My 4th was a preemie, and that really affected her, once home she would not settle down for sleep at night without me. Now this new baby is colicky, so I had to choose between no sleeping or co-sleeping so I chose the latter. But she is starting to feel a bit better so the first order of business is to get her in her own bed.

Anyways, to answer your question, I have never tended to lean to AP at all, my plan has always been to be quite traditional, and I mostly am, but different things work for different kids.

I am definetly all about putting a child down for a nap, by simply placing them in their beds.

I find that it's easiest to teach a child good habits from quite early on. A lot of people seem to think it's easier when a child is older and you're able to reason with them but I personally don't think so.
mom of 5 girls
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December 29th, 2005, 09:48 PM
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I was more AP style with my first. He slept with me until he was 4 years old. When dh and I got married he finally started sleeping in his own bed and it was a major fight that I thought I was never going to win. Don't get me wrong, I loved cuddling with him when he was a baby, etc. but I wish he was more independent. He is 9 years old and still doesn't seem as independent with a lot of things as other kids his age. My step son on the other hand was raised more traditionally and he is really independent. He can even cook! LOL.
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December 29th, 2005, 10:46 PM
.Amanda.'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Wasilla, Alaska
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This is my first baby, but i'm defintely doing things differently than i thought i would be. While i was pregnant i thought i would breastfeed for the first year, not use the CIO method, not use pacifiers, and have the baby sleep in his own room. Then he was born and i endured colic for 2 months! Needless to say, he uses his pacifier to fall asleep after crying for about 2 minutes in his crib in our room. I breastfed for one month but had supply issues and really no support or anyone to get breastfeeding advice from (this is one thing i deeply regret). Around 5am i do bring him to bed with us though so he'll sleep for a couple more hours, if i didn't do that then he'd be up ready to play!

I think a lot has to do with the baby itself too. I really wanted to use a sling, but River HATED it from day one. Just hated the thing. So, all this rambling to say that you can have all these ideas about how you want to raise your baby, but it really comes down to what works for you, your family, and the baby...and it might not be the same for every baby in your family.

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December 30th, 2005, 06:34 PM
~Casey~'s Avatar GraceNorraJennaMomma
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Location: Central Illinois
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ITA! I was all set to do things a caertain way, but when that didn't work for us I was crushed. I think the Big Man upstairs was reminding me that I'm not the one in charge here. I have now learned to embrace Grace's little quirks and be proud that we are raising her the best way we know how.
"I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out there isn't, than live my life as if there isn't and find out there is."
Casey(29) DH, Arron(31)DD, Grace(3) DD, Norra(2) DD, Jenna(8Mo.)

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January 2nd, 2006, 05:53 PM
JuneBug2006's Avatar Forever missing Gracie
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Vancouver Island, BC
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While my first son hasn't been an infant for about 7 years now, I did not believe in the whole attachment parenting.....

Yes, he slept in the same room as me for the first month but definately not in the same bed. I Had him in a bassinet in the room but not right next to me.... I did this because of the anxiety of having him so far away, as well as the fact that he was born a bit early and I needed to know he was safe..........

Within 3 weeks, he was sleeping through the night and that was when I first put him into his crib in his own room..........

I breastfed him for a little while but found it was not working out because he did not adapt to it well... I supplemented with formula until the formula completely took over........

He was in disposable diapers from day one.

He never used a pacifier, although I never had to use the CIO method, just because he was never really a crankpot.......
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January 2nd, 2006, 07:19 PM
CeiCei's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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With my 17 y/o I formula-fed and refused to co-sleep. With Little Ernest I breastfeed and co-sleep only because it is easier for me to get some sleep at night. I don't regret any decision I have made with either child except for the co-sleeping with Little Ernest. Call me selfish, but I miss having my DH hold me at night. Now we both just roll over and sleep even at times I can get Little Ernest in his crib. I look at my son Cordell and I take pride in what I have accomplished with him. He has grown to be a very hardworking and respectful young man. He's independent and I have no fear at this moment about him with drugs, drinking, or sex.
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My Three Princes: Cordell (23 y/o), Ernest (5 y/o), Robert (4 y/o)

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January 2nd, 2006, 08:09 PM
MamaAshley's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 7,287
The only huge thing I woudl change is letting the baby sleep with me all the time. My two year old daughter will not go to sleep on her own, and we're sleep trainign right now to get her into her own bed again (she's currntly screaming at her door right now fighting sleep). My sonw as in his own bed from day 1, and guess who's been sound asleep for over an hour now??? Never again! LOL

Ashley,doula and busy mom to:
Brianne 11
Colin 10
Kylie 9
Bryson 7
Noah 5

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January 4th, 2006, 11:11 AM
~*Dina*~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: California
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I have to say cosleeping is the bad thing for me too. I had her sleeping in her crib from newborn to 5 months then she got sick and I put her in bed with me, now she wont stay in her bed all night and it SUCKS. I want my bed back.

I also agree that every baby is diff. You can say your going to raise them one way and end up doing the exact opposite. We all do the best we can, and I think thats good enough.

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January 4th, 2006, 11:25 AM
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I resorted to Co-sleeping just to get a few hours of sleep at night. But I have to say, I never really like it, because I didn't sleep too well and I never got any alone time with DH. I told my doctor about it and he was like.."you'd better get him in his crib soon or he will be 5 years old and sleeping in your bed. So, that night I went home and started putting him in his crib. It took about 2 weeks but now he sleeps through the night in his crib. I like being able to sit on the couch with hubby again and watch a movie..just the two of us.
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