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"Children should be seen and not heard."

Forum: Traditional Parenting


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September 13th, 2012, 07:29 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Cali, USA
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Originally Posted by mama0807 View Post
I do not use this saying. I think children should be able to contribute to the dinner table conversation and I always took this saying to mean that kids were not allowed to speak if the adults were, ykwim?

I'm a fan of indoor voice/outdoor voice, though.
ditto im thinking it was more recently used to keep kids from always interrupting adults trying to have a conversation
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September 16th, 2012, 05:24 PM
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 7
I used to have friends who thought that children should be seen and not heard... Heck, sometimes they would shove the children out of sight so they did not have to mess with them. I, on the other hand, have not felt that way. Everyday I look at my 13-year-old, I recall her tiny one-week-old body laying on my lap and tears flow from my eyes as I recall how much of a miracle they are to me. I allow my daughter to have a voice. She voices her opinions to me without any consequences. I mean... how is she supposed to know herself 100% and know how the world works if she is not allowed to speak or see?

That's my 2 cents anyway...
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November 20th, 2012, 05:14 PM
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 1
When my kids have something intelligent to say I let them speak during dinner. Other times they are expected to keep quiet, especially out in public.

We teach them to have respect for noise level especially in crowded places and with firm discipline they have learned to behave.
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November 25th, 2012, 07:54 PM
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 36
I don't really practice this saying. I try to find a balance of making sure DD feels like a valuable part of our family (contributing to conversation and opinions) while instilling manners (not interrupting adults talking).
This is good practice for us during Bible study.

It's hard for DH and I to have a conversation with a little voice constantly interrupting. I do ask DD's feelings on things...even if she just wants to gibber. It makes her feel important, too.
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July 14th, 2014, 12:43 PM
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 10
Of course, teach your kid to be free and speak their minds.
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August 22nd, 2014, 05:30 PM
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: On the farm
Posts: 39
I don't agree with it at all. It's good to teach them respect, but to rob them of their voice is utterly insane.
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April 7th, 2015, 06:21 AM
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 13
Same here!
Originally Posted by challowell View Post
That was the way I was raised but I let my kids make noise. I just teach them there is a time to be loud and a time to be quiet.
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September 11th, 2015, 01:52 PM
LLK LLK is offline
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 128
This is a old thread but a good topic. So you could say we were raised that way, so were my parents... We weren't prohibited from speaking to adults we just knew what was expected of us when in public, at friends houses etc. Like no interrupting, yelling/screaming in public, playing in our rooms when guests were over. I don't see anything wrong with it. We will teach our children the same.
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