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"I no baby. I no need help. I'm a big kid."

Forum: 2010 Playroom


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June 14th, 2013, 08:07 PM
mrsdaiwa24's Avatar Amy, soon-to-be-mama of 2
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: The Midwest
Posts: 10,073
Are you walking this fine line at home too?

We're at that crossroads -- she's not a baby but she's still not a true big kid. But sometimes we tell her that she's a big kid ("Use your words and don't whine -- you're a big kid now") and sometimes we have to tell her that she's not big enough ("You can't go down that slide because you're too little."). Tonight she made it crystal clear that she was a big kid when she pushed my hand away and put the toothpaste on her own toothbrush.

How do you encourage the independence and celebrate the accomplishments but at the same time, gently remind them that they're still little? I mean, how do you go from "Yay! Big kids go on the potty and you just did!!!!!" to "You're still too little to walk without holding my hand".

Need I say it? They're growing up so fast!!!!!!!
Thank you JAIDYNSMUM for my adorable new siggy!
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June 16th, 2013, 11:50 AM
Pupcake74's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,580
For the most part I let him try stuff and remind him to ask for help when he can't get it. There are things that are just the way they are. Like holding hands while we are out.

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June 17th, 2013, 07:54 AM
redbirds's Avatar Blessed Again!
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: CO
Posts: 18,447
Awww... Amy! I'm in the same boat. I just let him dictate when he needs my help and when he can do it by himself. When it comes to things like holding hands in the parking lot, I tell him he's a big kid, but he's still too little for cars to see and they can see me, so he has to hold my hand to make us even BIGGER! He likes the idea of being bigger
Gwynne, celebrating the newest of our four precious miracles

Hat's off to Vicki for my cute siggy, thank you!
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June 17th, 2013, 10:13 AM
AtomicMama's Avatar CopperBoom!
Join Date: May 2008
Location: MI
Posts: 14,754
If there is something he can probably do himself, I do my best to try to let him (this is such a lesson in patience for me, since I keep thinking it's faster if I just do it myself). He gets very upset when I tell him he isn't big enough/old enough to do something. "No! I am bigger!" In those cases, I tell him he has to be as big as daddy (like when he wants to buy a lighter at the gas station ).

The hardest is when Sammy can do something that he can't (like go on her field trip the other day). Since size wise he IS bigger, he doesn't really get that he isn't as "big" or as old as she is. We just try to emphasize that Sammy is older, and when he is 4 he can do it to (which he usually replies with heart wrenching cries of "I 4, mama! I 4!!"). And then he just doesn't get to do whatever it is. I guess he'll figure it out eventually?
Amy: Wife to my Handsome Husband Mommy to my superhero, Max (3) and Luckiest Bonus Mama to Sammy (5)

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June 17th, 2013, 02:50 PM
krsnow's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Chicago
Posts: 642
I try to avoid telling him he is too little for something because I think it makes him upset. They only thing I say that for is the giant jungle gym\slide at the park, I always tell him that is for big kids and that Dada can help him try it next time they are at the park, but mommy cant climb that high. Otherwise if he wants to grab my coffee or pop I tell him those drinks are for grown ups.

I have been trying to encourage him to do things himself as much as possible, like feeding himself, putting on socks, brush teeth etc. After I had my baby (now 9 months old) I noticed Joey getting lazy with stuff and wanting me to feed him and I think it is all about attention. So Im really trying to give him more attention and praise for the stuff he does on his own.

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