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Culture and other differences

Forum: Interracial Families


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September 14th, 2009, 08:39 PM
Perfectly~Flawed's Avatar ♥ Proud Potterhead! ♥
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How do you handle them with your SO or family?

We're both pretty laid back Baptist so we don't clash in much. Our problem is(really it's he doesn't care but his family raises eyebrows) our bedroom and most of the living room is African themed. We didn't really think about it but he say a painting and thought it was cool so it spread from there. His sister made a comment, even though she was kidding, "I thought there was a white guy here too."

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September 15th, 2009, 05:24 AM
Oona's Avatar Member
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Location: DENMARK/Faroe Islands
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With house Deco, nothing african here yet, but am soon importing but am sure they will just like it any way.

One thing i dont like about here is taking off of shoes whenever you go to some ones home.
High heels are almost imposible to wear here unless you are going out.
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September 15th, 2009, 10:24 AM
Chikika's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I am being overwhelmed with the culture from SOs side right now! Since I now have a native baby, MIL is starting to tell me about all the different ceremonies he needs to attend, and all the different traditions and formalities.....I never imagined! But it's so exciting I can't wait to know what his native name will be.

My family is culturally barren so it doesn't clash, anyway

Thank you ~Vicki~ for the sig~!

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September 16th, 2009, 01:09 PM
~FaRRaH~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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To be honest our bedroom is egyptian themed and the rest of the house is deco'd by me. lol However I think if it was said in my presence I would have said something like yup and he helped pick it out! Dont cha like it
To be honest I get the worst stares and comments even now after it being 7 years and 4 visits to his home country (he is from a small village) so everyone knows us by now and still stares. I still get upset because I am wearing culturally traditional clothing however my american face bothers them. So I let me witty attitude loose on them all. I think the longer we bite tongues the more built up it gets and that often leads to recentment. Good luck I hope they really were joking and not trying to cut you from under. Best wishes!!
Thank you Heather(hettyhoo) for my beautiful siggy

Islam Jr. 09-20-2003 * Sumaiya-Alee 09-07-2007 * Angel Baby 01-08-2010
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September 19th, 2009, 09:22 AM
Adriana's Mommy's Avatar I <3 my kids
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I'm vary lucky that my DH isn't into his countries "Decor".. lol He's all American and could careless of about where his parents came from, which is Mexico.. I'm also the same way.. I don't really care about my heritage as well.. I'm an American, not German and Filipino.. I'm first generation American.

The only thing that bugs me is that my DH family speak Spanish if front of me and rarely translates for me.. It's drives me crazy!!! Also, with my baby boy that's coming.. My DH family wanted me to name him with a tradional Spanish name, but I refused.. I did compromise with Anthony.. But that's the closes I would get.. lol

I know your probably think I'm awful for not embrassing my nationality or my DH nationality..

Plus, if I went to my mom's home country, they would not like me because I'm only 1/2 Filipino.. If I was to go to my dad's home country of Germany, I would not blend in there.. lol And of course in Mexico, they don't really like Mexican Americans.. It's a no win situation for me.. lol

Last edited by Adriana's Mommy; September 19th, 2009 at 09:25 AM.
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September 20th, 2009, 05:35 PM
Mega Super Mommy
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the language used to bother me but now i know about 85% of spanish so its okay. one time hubby told me he wished i spoke spanish because they express themselves better and that really hurt.also the food. he has to have everything with a ton of spices or its bland to him. it also bothers me that my inlaws are always telling my husband to teach our kids spanish so they can communicate.i do think my kids should know their language but i also think they should try to learn english.
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September 20th, 2009, 09:58 PM
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Sadly, my husband and I have been having quite a few problems with his family. His mom keeps asking if anyone in my family is being mean to him (we're black, they are half Jewish, half...Redneck. I mean that as lovingly as possible, but rural Georgia, no other word for it. ). Hubby's dad asked if there were any crackheads in my family, and refuses to visit. *sigh* We didn't know how prejudice his family was until we got married. :-(....his father (the Redneck half) told him when we announced the marriage that "it's ok to have your fun with them, but you don't bring it home, you don't marry one"..."one" being me :-(
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September 22nd, 2009, 06:15 AM
~FaRRaH~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I am so sorry you ladies have difficulties with your In-laws Mrs.Legends I can completely see that you would be quite hurt by your in-laws. I dont live in GA but my sister does and I have been there many times I can relate to the redneck thing. Your FIL and my father would be best buds LOL since he pretty much feels the same way however my sister has 5 kids with her black husband so our father had to learn good behavior. These days he has come to understand that her husband is a good man and that his color should not matter, so God willing your FIL will come around too. I hope its gets better.
I can relate to the language thing, especially when we visit Egypt it drives me crazy at times... I ave had to make DH slow down and fill me in.
HTH ladies, my son doesnt speak Arabic very well and he is 6, it hurts him that he loves his grandmother and family so much but gets so frustrated that they dont understand him nor him them, we are only hurting the kids when he dont embrace and teach them both languages. However since I learned a lot more arabic since having DS and now DD is almost fluent in both languages (which is helping DS) and her realtionship with the in-laws is great since they both understand each other. The joy is in the eyes....

Hangin there!!
Thank you Heather(hettyhoo) for my beautiful siggy

Islam Jr. 09-20-2003 * Sumaiya-Alee 09-07-2007 * Angel Baby 01-08-2010
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