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worried (pregnancy mentioned)

Forum: Stillbirth


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May 17th, 2009, 11:41 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 696
I am so worried about this baby. I have absolutely no reason. I have seen this baby 3 times on ultrasound, and all 3 were great. I go for another one this upcoming Thursday. I don't know if I'm having such a hard time because today is 5 months to the day that we said goodbye to Robert. I also don't know if it's because I really believed that by now, I would be able to hear the baby on doppler and I still cannot (I know this is super early). I also think I worry a little more because we got pregnant so fast after losing Robert (only 3 months!) and I was so far along with him, that I worry my body can't support another pregnancy so fast. I mean I am nauseous all the time, I eat all the time, so I know those things are fine, but I guess I also stress myself out because I have read so much about others early losses. AHHH!!! I am trying so hard to just chill out, but it's not working. I wish Thursday would come faster!!!!! How did all of you deal with being pregnant the next time? I'm trying to take it one day at a time, but it is REALLY hard. Any advice?
*A HUGE thank you to Maitri for my beautiful siggy!
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May 17th, 2009, 12:30 PM
Proud Momma
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 3,781
I haven't yet gotten pregnant after losing Katrina, but I think I can honestly say your feelings are absolutely normal. I am so excited to be pregnant again, but sooo terrified at the same time.

And 8 weeks is very early to hear the heartbeat.

I'm not going to tell you not to worry, because everyone in our situation is going to do that regardless. But just know that what you're feeling is normal. Sorry I'm not the best person to give advice on this

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May 17th, 2009, 12:37 PM
claire1979's Avatar mummy to a special angel
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: huddersfield, england
Posts: 33,629
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i was the same to the very second keeley was born it natural hun just take one day at a time

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May 17th, 2009, 12:40 PM
BellaBellski's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: DC, BC
Posts: 3,554
One day at a time is exactly right I'm almost 19 weeks and I've had 3 ultrasounds, all were perfect, yet I wake up every morning scared that I'm going to lose the baby. Especially as I approach 21 weeks (when I lost D) I'm super stressed out!!! I can't wait to have this baby in my arms, I think until that happens - it's normal to be scared.

Proud Mommy to Mattea Lilian born February 21st 2007 - 7lbs 14oz &
Owen Markus James born October 21st 2009 - 10lbs
Forever loving & Missing ~Damian~ born into heaven August 13th 2008
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May 17th, 2009, 02:51 PM
liz bevan's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Edmonton, AB
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I haven't been pregnant since we lost Malachi in december. I can only image what that would feel like. I know that if i was in your shoes i would be a wreak. I will keep you in my thoughts

Thank you so much for the awesome siggie Claire
Our joys will be greater
Our love will be deeper
Our lives will be fuller
Because we shared your moment
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May 17th, 2009, 07:27 PM
rebeccabaltimore and more's Avatar (rebeccabaltimore)
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 1,732
I was told by my very talented OB nurse that you just can't hear a heartbeat on Doppler until at least 10 weeks. So not hearing it now is normal I think. And I think it is DEFINITELY normal to be afraid this time around.

Thank you Vicki for my awesome siggy!!

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May 17th, 2009, 09:55 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 696
Thank you all for the kind words and the reassurance. I just cannot wait for Thursday to get here! I want to think that the 2nd trimester will be a little easier on me, at least before the really stressful 3rd trimester, but I don't know if I believe that it will be :-(
*A HUGE thank you to Maitri for my beautiful siggy!
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May 18th, 2009, 12:21 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,573
Having had two babies since my loss...I have to agree with the "one day at a time" thing. I had to remind myself that as far as I knew so far, everything was okay. So I tried to make myself believe everything would still be okay. I found forcing myself to be positive was better than dwelling on every small thing that could go wrong every minute.

You'll make it, and it will be SO WONDERFUL when the baby gets here.
Thanks to babydoll213 for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog

Last edited by Brittanie; May 18th, 2009 at 12:27 PM.
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May 19th, 2009, 08:34 AM
BakingMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 1,192
I actually held it together pretty good until about 2 weeks ago. Here I am at the end of the first trimester and I'm more worried than I was before. I think it's natural that we feel more impatient, worrisome and anxious than women who haven't had a stillbirth or at least some sort of loss.

In a way though, I think stillbirth makes you more anxious. Because you were far enough along i nyour pregnancy to have to give birth and you thought you were safe, beyond the point of miscarriage. But if they have already given you 3 ultrasounds hopefully they will keep giving you the extra care to help try to ease your mind.

I know with Roald we got a heartbeat at 9.5 weeks on U/S, but it took them until I was 16 weeks to get it on the doppler. But this pregnancy, we got thre heartbeat on the doppler at 12 weeks. I also think some nurses and doctors are better at finding it earlier.
Visit Terry & Roald's Memorial Site!

Thanks to Mommy2Belle for my Roald blinkie!
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