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Forum: Stillbirth


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August 14th, 2009, 12:12 PM
rebeccabaltimore and more's Avatar (rebeccabaltimore)
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 1,732
I'm out this month. I started spotting at work today. I always spot for a few days before AF shows. And I've had two BFNs. So we will be doing IUI later this month as planned. I had really hoped not to need it, since it is SO much work. Injections are easy foe me (I'm diabetic) but all of those blood tests and doctor's visits, yuck. We will have to skip our planned vacation, because of all the blood tests and ultrasounds. I am REALLY disappointed by that. And my mom is not helping, she's super worried I'll get OHSS like she did. DH isn't helping either, he wants solid answers about why we haven't gotten pregnant since losing Ethan, and there's really no clear answer to that, since I'm ovulating and everything.

Ethan's been gone 6 months, I really should be pregnant by now. Fertility problems do NOT help the grieving and worrying.

Thank you Vicki for my awesome siggy!!

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August 14th, 2009, 12:28 PM
BakingMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 1,192
Ugh, I'm sorry.
Visit Terry & Roald's Memorial Site!

Thanks to Mommy2Belle for my Roald blinkie!
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August 14th, 2009, 01:55 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 829
I'm so sorry hun,

I can imagine it does suck. The good news is, infertility isn't always a curse.

I was told in Feb. of '08 at the ripe age of 20 that my follicles aren't maturing enough to release an egg, and when or if I do ovulate, the ovum is weak. I would go months without a period.

In the time after that, Kelly & I were devastated, a young couple just starting out, and being told that w/o medical intervention we could not conceive. We gave it a rest for a while, tried not to think about it, by July the same year, we had gotten pregnant and didn't know it until almost October (since it was so common to miss periods).

My point is, you've done it once, it will happen when the time is just perfect. And even if you do need help w/it, that baby will be a blessing just the same.

Last edited by KatieBunny; August 14th, 2009 at 01:58 PM.
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August 14th, 2009, 02:35 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,573
I'm so sorry. I hate that something that should be so simple is so much work for some people (whom I love dearly!).

Loads of baby dust for you!
Thanks to babydoll213 for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog

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August 14th, 2009, 04:30 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,304
sorry that it didn't happen this month and that your mom isn't being more supportive.

Owen, Avery, Samantha and forever missing Jake born still 08/01/99.

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August 15th, 2009, 01:08 AM
claire1979's Avatar mummy to a special angel
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: huddersfield, england
Posts: 33,629
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big hugs rebecca,

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August 15th, 2009, 05:43 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: CT
Posts: 982
awww Rebecca! You know that with so many people a pregnancy occurs when they just decide to take a break from ttc or as soon as they make up their minds to adopt. It will happen soon for you one way or another and there is no shame in asking for help. I think its awesome that you are getting to do IUI after only 6 months of trying, so many people I know have to wait a year before getting that extra help. I know its easier said than done but just try to relax. I think Ethan is trying to choose the perfect little one for his Mommy and Daddy!!
Married to my best friend Tom since 2004 (together since 1999)
Mommy to two little boys:
Jamie ~ 7-12-04 ~ fun, crazy, transformer loving tough-guy mama's boy
Joey ~ 4-4-09 ~ born sleeping ~ held under my heart for 40wk1d, in my arms for just 6 short hours but he will be in my heart forever
And finally holding my little girl,Felicity Rose, Born into Daddy's loving hands on June 9, 2010

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August 15th, 2009, 11:44 PM
liz bevan's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Edmonton, AB
Posts: 998
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So sorry you are having so much trouble getting pregnant.
I am in the same boat. We have been trying for a while and still am not pregnant.

Thank you so much for the awesome siggie Claire
Our joys will be greater
Our love will be deeper
Our lives will be fuller
Because we shared your moment
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August 16th, 2009, 08:35 PM
Proud Momma
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 3,781
I'm so sorry Rebecca (and Liz)

I know how tough it is because I was on that boat at one time, as you very well know. It took us 8 very long months of trying. And I can say this now, but please, please, please keep your chin up. It WILL happen for you both. I know it really doesn't seem possible when you're trying and you know when you're ovulating and you know you're doing it at the right time, but it still seems as if your body keeps failing you. I wish I had some words of wisdom for you and could just say one magic word and you'll be pregnant, but unfortunately it doesn't work like that. But I will be keeping you both in my thoughts and send some your way.

And I just want to add one thing. I feel as if I'm in a really, really good place with this pregnancy because we had to wait so long. We got pregnant 10 months after losing Katrina and as much as I still miss and love her like crazy, I just feel as if I'm in a better place emotionally. As much as I still worry with this pregnancy, I know how to control my emotions better. It seemed like an extremely long time at the time we were trying, to get pregnant, but looking back, this year actually went by very fast.

I know it will happen for you both. many, many
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August 18th, 2009, 08:06 AM
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 244
the pain of dealing with ttc is very real. I went through it for over 6 years before we finally had to do IVF.
Be kind to yourself. You only have control over so much. It's not your fault. And dealing with ttc while grieving? ugh, even harder.

*hugs* Hang in there.
b/g twins Logan and Ella
Logan stillborn, loved beyond measure

Journey to Logan video http://smilebox.com/playBlog/4e54597...314d673d3d0d0a
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August 18th, 2009, 09:46 AM
lunarmagic's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: MA
Posts: 4,037
Oh having problems conceiving again makes the grieving much, much worse. I am just so utterly angry and bitter and constantly fighting the urge to cry... not out of grief, but pure frustration. I feel like I'm stalled in the healing process and can't move forward.

I'm sorry you've had another failed month.

2 IVF babies and 1 surprise!
~*~ My Blog ~*~
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