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Went back to work

Forum: Stillbirth


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October 12th, 2009, 08:17 PM
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 443
I went back to work after being off 6 weeks. It has not been the easiet thing let me tell you. I know it is something I had to do though. All of my coworkers are wonderful people and very supportive. They even closed the office for the day to attend Evans funeral. The hardest part is all the patients that come in and the drug reps that all knew that I was excepting a wonderful bundle of joy, asking how is the little one or do you have pictures of the new baby. Everyday I have to explain over and over again what happend to our sweet Evan James.

I know eventually it won't be as often people asking once a majority of them know but for now it is so hard. Especially since it has only been about 2 months since we said goodbye.

Well besides trying to survive the days at work I have been very frustrated because I have been trying all night to post a counter box from snugglepie.com and every time I try it says invalid file. can anybody help me with this please.



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October 12th, 2009, 08:23 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,573
It was so hard for me to go back to work after delivering Cora. I, too, had several regulars who came in all the time asking, and it was one of the factors that went into me switching jobs.

As for the snugglepie counter, make sure to get the BBcode one. It's the one that starts [img] with the brackets rather than <>

Thanks to babydoll213 for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog

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October 12th, 2009, 08:38 PM
lunarmagic's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: MA
Posts: 4,037
I am sorry. Going back to work was hard, like you said, because of all the people who didn't know. If you can, see if your work can let people know ahead of time so you don't have to handle telling yet another person. It's just hard, and it never really gets much easier.

2 IVF babies and 1 surprise!
~*~ My Blog ~*~
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October 13th, 2009, 10:09 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: New York
Posts: 1,760
I went back to work about a month ago. It's still hard. I work in a big office, so I still have people coming up to me and asking how's the baby and where are the pictures. Many days I just try to avoid people. Like sometimes I go into the pantry to get a coffee or something and see someone who I have not yet spoken to and I run away. Or if I see an elevator full of people I try to wait for another one. I lied to one guy who thinks I had a live baby because he asked me in the elevator in front of strangers how my baby was and I just said "good". There are some clients that I haven't spoken to yet, and dreading to have a call from them. See, in my office, my boss only told people who work in my group. They're the only ones that knew and didn't ask me anything when I came back. Another thing is that my office moved into a different building while I was on maternity leave, so there are a few ladies that knew I was pregnant but they stayed in the old building which is good for me.

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October 13th, 2009, 11:14 AM
NutMeg76's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: United States
Posts: 20,689
I had such a hard time going back to work. It was not fun to see patients and have them ask questions. I was already wearing my maternity uniform for a few weeks, so they knew I was pregnant. And since I was only allowed to have about 3 weeks off, a lot of the same patients were still there.

I asked them to tell everyone what happened, but they didn't tell anyone, even other people in our facility. I think there are still people that don't know what happened.

When they persisted in questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "Let the person among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her." John 8:7
Sail Back to Me
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October 13th, 2009, 02:53 PM
BakingMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 1,192
Going back to work was one hardship I did not have to endure as I am a homemaker. I have read though that it is very emotional. Plus I know my husband had issues with it. Actually my stop here today I am writing a post about my husband's job and Roald so this is sort of a coincidence. I am at least glad though that your job sounds like it is pretty supportive.
Visit Terry & Roald's Memorial Site!

Thanks to Mommy2Belle for my Roald blinkie!
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October 13th, 2009, 07:06 PM
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 443
I still cannot get my counter box code from snuggle pie to work it is a ubb code but when i paste it to my avatar it says invalid file I don't know what I am doing wrong .

Well today was another long day at work. More people asking how the baby is doing. I tell some people then others I just pretend like i didn't hear them. I try and stay busy through out the day so I don't have to talk to people that don't know about what happend.

My coworkers are the best though they are so understanding and supportive. My one coworker is expecting a baby boy in December and she has been the best. She is so supportive and I am so happy for her and at the same time so scared for her because I know that all that happiness can be taken away in a heartbeat. I just hope all goes well with her and her baby. She has had quite a few problems with the pregnancy from the beginning.

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October 13th, 2009, 11:41 PM
Proud Momma
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 3,781
I'm so sorry Going back to work was SO very difficult for me. I remember walking through the door and fighting back tears...then not even 15 minutes into being there, I was locking myself in the bathroom sobbing.

Then of course all the clients who knew I was pregnant seemed to all come in at once and kept asking how the pregnancy was going. I lost Katrina at just before 23 weeks, and when I went back to work, I still looked very pregnant. It was VERY difficult explaining that I was no longer pregnant. I wanted to tell them all about my little girl, but the moment they found out she didn't make it, they got all weird and awkward and quickly changed the subject. I really don't know what was worse...having to explain it to tons of people through tears that my beautiful daughter didn't make it, or knowing that they just instantly wanted to change the subject and make it as if she didn't even exist.

Then there was my boss and some of my other co-workers, who just acted as if absolutely nothing had happened and told people I was on vacation when they had come looking for me...yea some freaking vacation...and they couldn't even say anything to me or offer me any sort of condolences (maybe I'm being selfish, but it would have been nice if my own boss could have tried to at least acknowledge Katrina somehow).

Sorry for going on my own rant here. It's nice that you have such supportive co-workers though.

Originally Posted by DIANA092778 View Post
I still cannot get my counter box code from snuggle pie to work it is a ubb code but when i paste it to my avatar it says invalid file I don't know what I am doing wrong .
Are you trying to paste it into your avatar or into your signature? Because you can only put them into your signature (I could be wrong). Sorry, I'm not the best with these things either...it took me SO long to figure out how to do mine as well. Hopefully you get it to work soon.
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October 14th, 2009, 06:13 PM
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 443
I am so sorry that your coworkers were not supportive that is horrible. People that have not gone through this don't know how to treat people that have. It really bothers me also that some people act like Evan never existed, just because we didn't bring our angels home doesn't mean that they didn't exist is what I want to tell them. Again I am so sorry you were treated that way. I will always listen when you want to talk about Katrina.

About my counter box yes I was trying to paste it into avatar not signature I will try pasting it in signature instead. Thanks for letting me know.

Again anytime you want someone to talk to or just to listen I am here.



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