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I made myself sad

Forum: Stillbirth


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November 23rd, 2010, 04:42 PM
rebeccabaltimore and more's Avatar (rebeccabaltimore)
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 1,732
When I decided to wear the locket with Ethan's footprints in them to Thanksgiving dinner. So both of my boys could be there.

I am seriously considering packing his picture from the mantle for the trip, just to have it with me.

******* **** **** ****. Everyone says to be thankful for what I have, but sometimes I do think about what I was supposed to have.

Thank you Vicki for my awesome siggy!!

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November 23rd, 2010, 05:06 PM
Posts: n/a
Just because you are sad about losing a child doesn't mean that you are not thankful for what you have. Ethan will always be your child, even if he can't be here with you.
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November 23rd, 2010, 06:26 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,573
I hate that line. So, if one of my parents died should I just be thankful I have the other? If one of my four brothers died, should I just be thankful I have the 3 others? So stupid.

I know you are grateful for Grant. But that won't ever make you stop loving Ethan, so you're never going to stop missing Ethan.

I'm going to wear my emerald heart earrings that are Cora's birthstone to Thanksgiving.
Thanks to babydoll213 for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog

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November 24th, 2010, 12:38 AM
claire1979's Avatar mummy to a special angel
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: huddersfield, england
Posts: 33,629
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its like when people say you can have another baby!!! what like the one who died dosen't matter huh..... stupid saying! of course your thankful hun but its dosen't make it better. hugs hun. x

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November 24th, 2010, 02:53 AM
lunarmagic's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: MA
Posts: 4,037
Yeah. It's hard to explain to people who haven't been through it. I am so happy, I love Kate so much, but some days it's hard not to think about what Devin would have been like. There will always be sadness... and it doesn't mean I am not thankful for what I DO have!

2 IVF babies and 1 surprise!
~*~ My Blog ~*~
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November 24th, 2010, 10:50 AM
rebeccabaltimore and more's Avatar (rebeccabaltimore)
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 1,732
My Dad is kinda like this. Next time I'm going to ask him "What if one of the twins died at birth? KNowing what you know now about loving them and their place in the family, do YOU think have at least one surviving child is enough?"

Thank you Vicki for my awesome siggy!!

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November 24th, 2010, 10:53 AM
HopefulMommy81's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: California
Posts: 5,640
I agree with everything the other ladies said. My sister gave me a necklace with a forget-me-not flower and my birthstone plus Matthew's birthstone on it shortly after Matthew died. I put it on when I got it and I've never taken it off. I feel like I can't take it off. I've debated getting a tattoo of Matthew's footprints on me so I can take him with me everywhere I go but I haven't done it yet- I'm really not a "tatoo person" but I really want to do this I think. I think we'll all be remembering the babies we lost especially in the next month but that doesn't mean we're not thankful for what we have. Even though Matthew isn't here, I'm thankful I had him in my life for the short time I was pregnant with him.

Annalise is hoping to be a big sister on June 28, 2014. Forever missing her big brother, Matthew, stillborn on July 1, 2010.
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