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Hurts more then ever.....

Forum: Loss of a Child


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May 11th, 2010, 12:51 PM
peggums27's Avatar Luv my girls
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Winnipeg,Mb
Posts: 3,142
I never dreamt that the loss of Rnnon would hurt worse after having another baby.....
We had Mia in December and I love her to pieces, but all I can think about lately is that Rennon never got the chance to grow out of his baby clothes, he never got to try to to drink from a bottle...... I have been gathering up Mia's too small clothes and it it hurts soo bad I try to be strong but Mother's Day really started it all for me... it will 3 years on the 26th od this month and it still feels like yesterday.
Sorry for the crying fir but I feel like the worst Mum right now, I should be over the moon with this rainbow baby and having her be so strong ( she was a 5 week preemie and is doing great). But the past few days I catch myself crying over little things and my dh doesnt understand at all.
I know I will never be over losing him and I know nothing will take away this pain, I just havent felt this sad about losing him in some time, and now looking at a picture of him brings me to tears and I always think of the what if's

Peggy ~ Mom to~ Alexa 07-13-00 Rennon (RIP) 05-26-07 Mia 12-10-09

And I can't breathe without you, but I have to breathe, without you, I have to
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May 11th, 2010, 03:09 PM
MellieB's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Melbourne, Aust.
Posts: 64,110
I could have written your post. You are not alone in these feelings.

Thanks to Claire1979 for the amazing siggy.

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Our Angel Baby on Facebook

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May 11th, 2010, 08:24 PM
Jodi Dawn's Avatar Host of the Jan-July 05 P
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 25,747
Send a message via Yahoo to Jodi Dawn
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May 13th, 2010, 09:44 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Indiana
Posts: 9,769
I'm so sorry sweetheart. We too are coming upon 3 years. And it's so so **** hard
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May 17th, 2010, 12:04 PM
Join Date: May 2010
Location: NC
Posts: 6
I am so sorry about all your losses, I just lost my baby boy on April 14 2010 11 hours after I gave birth to him he passed away. the first time i held him was when he died in my arms. I don't think this pain will ever go away . I have a 5 year old and I look at him and feel so ashamed so angry I couldn't give him a healthy baby brother and i get so mad at my self. How do you ever get over the pain the what if's the what did I do so wrong to have my baby taken away from me???
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