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Having a baby after a loss

Forum: Loss of a Child


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November 13th, 2010, 06:12 PM
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 82
Well I havent been on here in sometime but I just thought id stop by. Im having another baby in January. We lost our lil 5 month old Addy 18 months ago and last april decided to get my IUD out so I could get pregnant sometime when God thought we were ready. Well I got pregnant 3 weeks later. I felt guilty for several months and very scared something was going to happen. Now im feeling excited and nervous and still some guilt now. I know it just means Addy will have a sister but you cant help but feel very emotional. Im just wondering if anyone has gone through this and how they got through it.
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November 15th, 2010, 09:23 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Indiana
Posts: 9,769
I wish I had some suggestions for you. I know that some of the girls here have and I will point them in the directions of this thread <3
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November 16th, 2010, 12:23 AM
MellieB's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Melbourne, Aust.
Posts: 64,110
Hope you don't mind but I c+p'd my response from another post on the same topic.

The stress and anxiety is one of the main reasons Lucy is our last. Neither my husband or I could go through that again.

Honestly, no, I didn't enjoy my pregnancy at all. I was so glad when it was over. I never really bonded with Lucy either until after she was born. We kept the gender a surprise to try and help give us some excitement about the pregnancy but I think all it did was make it easier not to bond.

I was afraid to tell people this is how I felt or fear of their reactions because it probably does sound abnormal and wrong to those who have never been through it.

I just took thinks one day at a time and counted down to my EDD (then went 5 days past it ). I was supposed to give birth at a birth centre but at about 36 weeks wanted to transfer to a better hospital but was told my reasons for wanting the transfer for were not good enough. That really didn't help ease the fears I had or help me cope with the feelings.

If you ever need someone to talk to please feel to PM me.

Thanks to Claire1979 for the amazing siggy.

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November 27th, 2010, 07:52 PM
Brighteyed & Caffeinated
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,444
Send a message via MSN to mommy2olliebeans
I lost my 3 year old daughter, Gracie, on November 16, 2009. I am currently 5 months pregnant and due in April 2011...... At times, I feel guilty and at other times, this really helps... .

Some really weird things have happened to me during this pregnancy too that really make me think....

My last LMP was on July 4th, 2010 (what would have been Gracie's 4th birthday).
My anatomy scan was booked by the OB who did my amnio and when he called the clinic, they booked it for November 16th, 2010 (it seemed as if my guardian angel had something to do with that, as if to make that day a little easier).
On November 15th (the monday, 1 year to the day that Gracie died), I got a call from medical genetics telling me that the new baby did not have any of the genetic diseases they had tested for......

It has been an interesting journey so far... and I know that my little angel up in Heaven is looking down...
C, mommy to:
4 kids - 3 with feet, 1 with wings
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