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Not my child lost - my fiance's son **live child mentioned**

Forum: Loss of a Child


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September 22nd, 2011, 12:00 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: O'Fallon, IL
Posts: 840
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I am not sure when my fiance's son was born...

what i do know is that Joey died at 2 months old from a heart condition that was not diagnosed. The doctor's didn't do the test for the condition...i don't remember the name of the condition...and i don't want to ask him again because it will break his heart.

All i know is that my fiance said that he woke up to hear joey crying and put his pacifier in his mouth. Around 245am, he woke up suddenly. He checked on joey, and saw a puddle of blood by his mouth. He RAN to the hospital (about a half mile away), yelled that his son wasn't breathing, and was taken right back. That was when they were hit with the bad news.

My fiance has his moments when he is depressed about it.
Coincidentaly - my son has the same name as his - and is a few months older. He loves my son like his own, and i don't mind.


Does anyone know how i can help him when the grief hits him? I feel helpless and i occasionally cry myself when i think about it all...

Thank you .:Shortcake:. for the awesome siggy!!

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September 27th, 2011, 10:06 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Grand Rapids Michigan United States
Posts: 2,890
I think just listen to him and be their for him when he needs to talk. Maybe do something nice for him. Make him a extra special dinner. Watch his favorite movie with him. Look at pictures or anything from his son. When he is ready of course. These are things that help me. Even crying with him. Maybe even remembering his son at Holidays with a small item. Maybe even going to a support group with him if he is ok with it. Hope this helps.
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September 29th, 2011, 06:33 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Indiana
Posts: 9,769
There really isn't much you can do except listen and tell him you are there for him and will listen if he wants to talk
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