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Is your DH stepping up?

Forum: 2013 Playroom


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March 15th, 2013, 08:24 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Iowa
Posts: 5,286
I wish mine would do more of the housework. I get tired of doing the cooking and the clean up.

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March 15th, 2013, 08:39 AM
jennyrae03's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Iowa
Posts: 3,241
My husband doesn't cook. Not that he doesn't try, he just honestly doesn't know how. But he has been really good about helping with other things that he typically doesn't do. He has been helping with laundry and dishes, and I don't even have to ask! That's unusual for him - we kind of have an agreement. He takes care of the outside stuff, and all of the "fixing" and I take care of the housework. It works better for us, but it is definitely helpful when he pitches in on occasion.
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March 15th, 2013, 08:58 AM
Fortroseberry's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 442
Unfortunately I've BTDT, so my husband is in that mode right now. Not ok with it lol

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March 15th, 2013, 08:59 AM
sweety_pie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Canada
Posts: 10,823
Mine does about the same as he did before I was pregnant...nothing! lol But that was expected!
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{Aug/07/201212 weeks} {Oct/29th/20127 weeks}
Forever missing my Mom...

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March 15th, 2013, 08:59 AM
Laurenj915's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: South Florida
Posts: 3,214
DH is kind of amazing with housework and cooking. He is doing everything right now. He usually does more than half of it though.
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Expecting a baby girl Nov 4, 2015
Breastfeeding, Cloth Diapering, Babywearing Mama!
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March 15th, 2013, 10:16 AM
Lemon's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,088
When my husband is here, he is super helpful. He's been cooking way more, doing the grocery run for me, bathing the kids, etc.
But he takes frequent business trips, which leave me SOL. Lol.

He's a great guy. And I know I'll rely on him after the baby too with the big kids.
angela - mom to joey (8) and emma (4) and william jude (10/16/13)
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March 15th, 2013, 10:29 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 650
DH is very helpful. Helps me with the kids, laundry, cleaning and cooking. Even not pregnant he's very helpful around the house. He always has said he likes to help to make up for all his overtime, stress of being an officer's wife and being alone so much, especially nights. I feel very blessed.
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March 15th, 2013, 10:30 AM
AshleeH's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Nova Scotia Canada
Posts: 156
wow--- guess my SO is the *** of the bunch!!!! he has been extremely unsupportive over the past 6 weeks since I first found out, and my blood pressure has raised when we argue--- which is every day my mom wants me out of that situation, not good for my health or the health of the baby... so I might be a single mom again raising baby alone (but with family support) .. why?? ive been extremely nauseaus and so so soooo tired after work I have no energy left for anything ... he feels left out... and blames me for everything... unfortunately he dosnt get that creating a baby and growing it can take so much out of a person.... im on my feet 12 hrs a day, then to add on top of that baby growing and being nauseaus and trying to make everyone happy... its utterly exhausting... im kinda wondering what my doc will say on tuesday for my check up as to what my blood pressure is then... bc I know it hasnt been good--- pretty bad when i can feel my heart pounding in my neck!

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March 15th, 2013, 10:43 AM
Spyctre's Avatar Arwen
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Freaking Louisiana
Posts: 9,231
My husband is very helpful, but we are both natural procrastinators. lol I normally try to get the basics done during the day, laundry and dishes. I leave toys out too often.

Lately I haven't felt like much of anything. DH has been doing laundry, but then we've been living out of the pile of clean clothes. I try to do the dishes once a day still. Toys are everywhere. It hurts to bend over to get them.
James Arwen est. April 2, 2005
Alice Marie - January 9, 2008
Winter Rose - February 14, 2012
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March 15th, 2013, 10:54 AM
YoginiMomma's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 210
my fiance does all that he can.... but he's a high school english teacher and only has 3 hours of free time during the week... he gets home at 6:30-- goes to the gym every day after school and has an hour commute- so the three hours that he's home are for downtime- he works really hard and supports both of us. On the weekends however, he's a total handyman, setting our place up (we just moved in to a new apartment) and going grocery shopping with me, and cleaning.

I REALLY wish he would cook though... when I'm too tired to cook he just makes scrambled eggs and toast for himself- it's the only thing he knows how to cook. The couple times I asked him to make dinner he accidentally put sesame seeds in the rice cooker, and oversteamed the broccoli. stuff like that.

thankfully he's applying for a new job next year that makes slightly more, is more of what he wants to do (still in education realm, but more management/planning) and gives him a TON of free time.. which I need because I need him to be home with me and baby. I will go crazy if I'm home alone with an infant all day. I know he's going to step it up, and i KNOW he's going to clear all his **** out of the second bedroom by the 2nd trimester.

*"It is through the body we realize we are a spark of divinity"* ~ Iyengar

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March 15th, 2013, 10:59 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Indiana, USA
Posts: 7,185
I will burn in hell if complain about my DH He is doing all the cooking, dish washing, taking care of DD. I go to work and come back and cuddle up in bed. That is it. BUT since he's doing so much he's mostly by himself trying to unwind and he watches Walking dead which I don't want to watch while pregnant. He is not spending time with me at all, claims he needs his personal time. Can't blame him. Uh oh..didn't I say I'll burn in hell if I complain. Oops!
Expecting baby girl September 29th

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March 15th, 2013, 11:20 AM
Wanta.number2's Avatar Hi, I'm Tiffani!
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,260
I absolutely cant complain either. Dh and i have a very " traditional" marriage... in other words, he works outside the home, and i do not. I take care of kids and the home. Since weve been pregnant though, dh works all day and then comes home and does everything other than cook, because he doesnt know how. I have either been sick or exhausted or both, nd he has been wonderful.
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March 15th, 2013, 11:28 AM
BelloFiglioLA's Avatar LAH * CLH
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 2,257
My DH doesn't have a choice. I've been in bed for weeks and we have a 2.5 year old. He doesn't cook (because he doesn't know how) so they've been eating out a lot but he's been doing all the laundry, dishes and cleaning though. And he completely takes care of our son. Thank God for him!!
All my love, all my life

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March 15th, 2013, 12:10 PM
Rosiegirl7's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Berkeley, CA
Posts: 1,207
Right now we both work and I do most of the cooking for us (only because I enjoy it but he definitely pitches in on laundry, makes the bed, runs the dishwasher and cooks when I'm too tired. He's French so he's very tidy and a great cook! On weekends we run errands together, watch movies and spend time together. I really can't complain! I'm also glad he doesn't "baby" me now that I'm pregnant- it helps me feel strong and I feel like I can still do alot of what I was doing before so I'm grateful for that.
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March 15th, 2013, 01:37 PM
2Corinthians10:4's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 12,959
Well I am gone so Dh doesn't really have the opportunity to step up, but I can tell you if I was there he still wouldn't do anything. That's just not Dh or the way he was raised. Yea sometimes I wish he would help, but I knew what I was getting myself into when we got married so I don't complain. I am proud that I have finally trained him that he can put his own dishes in the sink, now to get him to rinse them and stick them in the dishwasher....

Thank you Kiliki for my beautiful siggy!

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March 15th, 2013, 02:24 PM
Iluvmybabies*'s Avatar Mama to 5 girls and 1 boy
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 7,641
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He is amazing he has literally been my life saver for 13 years and I could not do it without him
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Matt(38)DH & soulmate for 15 1/2yrs (V-Feb 20/08 * VR-Feb 18/11)
6 time HG survivor , AP Mama to 5 GIRLS & a 1 BOY
Karrara 11 01/11/05, Kaiah 9 1/2 07/01/06, Kayda 8 01/12/08
Katara 4 02/10/12, Korra 2 1/2 10/10/13, Kannon 14mo 02/21/15
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March 15th, 2013, 02:46 PM
*Lana*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 7,279
I don't do it... so it finally bothers him enough to do it himself. We both work, but I do everything for my daughter. He works long hours, so we only see him on his day off. When he gets home he normally takes a shower, eats, watches tv then goes to bed. He has all that time to himself.
He is a worrier and doesn't want me overdoing it.

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March 15th, 2013, 02:52 PM
ILoveStorm2011's Avatar Mack :)
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 2,398
My Dh is so amazing! I have been mostly sitting on my butt when I'm not sleeping, but he understands that I'm just exhausted and when I apologize he tells me I'm growing a baby haha.
Even when I wasn't pg and was lazy he still let me be.
I have been cooking more and trying to clean up though with moving it makes it harder.
Excuse me if my typing is bad There's probably a baby in my arms.
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March 15th, 2013, 03:20 PM
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: NY
Posts: 3,079
SO works all day, sometimes 6 days a week. It's been silently decided that I will do the laundry, dishes, cleaning and cooking and he will do the outside stuff and if something needs fixing he will doit. Do I wish he knew how to cook? Yes, but the one time he made dinner he ended up getting very frustrated and angry, used about 10 pots/pans, and made a chicken casserole with crushed crackers, mashed potatoes, and pasta! Lol... his dessert came out pretty good though.

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March 15th, 2013, 03:58 PM
MrsPea's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Somerville, MA
Posts: 1,946
DH has always been truly incredible! Normally I do the cooking, clean the bathrooms, and laundry; he does dishes, grocery shopping, and vacuuming. Now he's doing almost everything! OK the house is a mess, and I do what I can but somethings fall through the cracks. He doesn't really cook so we've been ordering in or making frozen meals, not the healthiest but I try to cook when I can. He's completely supportive of me resting!

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