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Unexpected change of plans... could be problematic

Forum: 2013 Playroom


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June 10th, 2013, 08:33 AM
MarylandMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Maryland, near DC
Posts: 1,473
The plan has always been that when I go into labor, my parents would come to our house and stay with DD. Last month, my dad had to have emergency bypass surgery and then developed a SEVERE infection that almost took his life. He was on a ventilator for almost a week and couldn't move because they had to keep him unconscious. He developed a bad bed sore from that. He was able to go home a couple of weeks ago, but bc of his recovery, the plan changed and we decided that DD would go to their house when I have to go to the hospital to make it easier on my dad. Well, the sore that my dad developed while he was unconscious for so long developed an infection, so he landed back in the hospital late Saturday night after he spiked a fever. He will be in the hospital for at least a few days. So I don't know that my parents will be able to help with DD at all when I am in the hospital. Obviously, I am not upset with them. I completely understand and I just want my dad to get better, but it makes things a bit tougher on us. My aunt and uncle also live nearby and will help us, but it will be a little more difficult. They are older than my parents and they have never had kids. Also, my uncle has back problems and my aunt has knee problems, so they won't be able to get down by the bathtub to give her a bath or do things that are more physical like that. She will basically watch tv the whole time we are at the hospital. There are definitely worse things and I appreciate that they are always willing to help me. It just makes it harder. And, on top of that, I know my dad will be devastated not to be able to come see the baby right after she is born. And if he is still in the hospital, he won't be able to see her until after he is discharged. We won't be able to take her off of the maternity unit until we are discharged and they are not going to wheel his bed three floors down and into the maternity unit for him to see her and, even if they could, he would not want to meet her that way. The whole situation kind of stinks. It seemed like things were improving and now this. Why won't anything just be normal for my family during this pregnancy?!
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June 10th, 2013, 08:44 AM
MamaSkunk's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Minneapolis
Posts: 3,068
Awww hugs hun. I've had to make a few backup plans for my DD for when I go into labor because my mom has been bad about answering my calls for anywhere from 3-6 hours before returning my call (and its an hour drive for her to our house...if she's home. If she's at work or elsewhere in the cities it could be a 2 hour drive) So if I go into labor anytime after 5 pm on a weekday or weekend DD will be going to my cousins(who is also her god mommy) if its between 6 am and 5 pm on a weekday then DD will just be going with us to the hospital. :/ Although I must say this non longer bothers me so much at this prospect as DH said I didn't scream or cry while pushing DD out so I am not so worried about her freaking out about mommy anymore.

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June 10th, 2013, 08:52 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 2,153
I hope your dad improves really soon. As they broke my water, DH's dad was getting admitted to the hospital. I understand the stress at a time that things should be all joy. The baby will help your Mom's spirits though I am sure.

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June 10th, 2013, 09:57 AM
SassySami's Avatar Crunchy mama
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Colorado
Posts: 3,078
I'm sorry hun, do you have any friends that are willing to help??

I hope your dad feels better soon!

Sami, married to Joe, mama to Debra (9), Kaydence (7), Nolan (2) and Jarek born 6/26/2013, unassisted at home

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June 10th, 2013, 01:34 PM
MarylandMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Maryland, near DC
Posts: 1,473
Friends would try to help if I asked them to, but I don't feel like I can ask them to take off work if I would need someone on a weekday. Also, none of my local friends have kids, so I think all of them would be at a loss about what to do. I think my aunt and uncle are a better option over my friends. If it is a weekend, my sister will probably come, but she is an hour away. The update on my dad is that he has to have surgery tomorrow and won't be home from the hospital until Thurs, maybe Friday. So he may be getting out just as I'm heading in and his recovery is expected to take a good deal of the summer. This is going to be anything but the summer I had planned...
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