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Forum: 2013 Playroom


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July 8th, 2013, 08:39 PM
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 12
So this will be baby girl number 4 for our family. Not only was she a surprise she was conceived on an iud and even with two ER visits not discovered until 20 weeks when I demanded an answer and was swearing on my life I was pregnant or dying. I am blessed it was pregnant. She is also our first child conceived without trying and without femara or clomid. So here is why I am panicked, I had no inkling I was pregnant until just before the 3rd ER visit when I had some major "gas" in my stomach that I likened to fetal movement. Then it was like a light bulb went on and symptoms that I had been told were lupus episodes or pcos were actually my body forming a sweet little girl. I am terrified because in those first 19-20 weeks my husband and I celebrated our first anniversary hes ever been stateside for with a lot of wine, my brother coming home from deployment, again wine and our best friends "alive" day ( he was injured in Iraq) with beer and wine. Everyone including my OB have told me she is perfect and healthy (ultrasounds have been good) and my doctor went as far as to print out statistics and explain that the odds are in our favor. Still, as a nurse and Mom and someone who won't even breathe wonder fumes or stand by a microwave when she KNOWS she's pregnant, I am flipping out. I was just wondering if anyone had experience or reassurance.
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July 8th, 2013, 09:58 PM
iCathy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Fairfax, VA
Posts: 1,794
No experience, but welcome and (((hugs))). Congrats on your baby girl, how exciting. Plus you dont have to wait as long before she is here! lol

Thank you *Kiliki* for my sweet siggy!!

Make a pregnancy ticker
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July 8th, 2013, 10:22 PM
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 12
Thank you :-) we are extremely excited! Before we had an ultrasound my husband said,"Wow, maybe we finally have a boy and by accident!" When they were doing the ultrasound and she said,"Definitely a girl." He laughed and said,"Everyone in my unit will love this. I don't make boys." The girls are very excited to have another baby sister on the way.
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July 8th, 2013, 10:48 PM
ILoveStorm2011's Avatar Mack :)
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 2,398
Dont freak - I'm sure everything will be fine
Excuse me if my typing is bad There's probably a baby in my arms.
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July 8th, 2013, 11:10 PM
Iluvmybabies*'s Avatar Mama to 5 girls and 1 boy
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 7,641
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Welcome and congrats!!!

Try and relax and not freak I am sure she will be perfect!!

I am pregnant with baby girl #5 my hubby only makes girls apparently lol
Matt(38)DH & soulmate for 15 1/2yrs (V-Feb 20/08 * VR-Feb 18/11)
6 time HG survivor , AP Mama to 5 GIRLS & a 1 BOY
Karrara 11 01/11/05, Kaiah 9 1/2 07/01/06, Kayda 8 01/12/08
Katara 4 02/10/12, Korra 2 1/2 10/10/13, Kannon 14mo 02/21/15
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July 9th, 2013, 04:27 AM
sweety_pie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Canada
Posts: 10,823
Congrats and Welcome!!

{Aug/07/201212 weeks} {Oct/29th/20127 weeks}
Forever missing my Mom...

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July 9th, 2013, 05:12 AM
jamieshalon2's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Virginia
Posts: 3,151
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Well first off welcome to the group and congrats on your daughter. I have never personally done any of the things that you mentioned, BUT I do have a friend (and I say this VERY loosely), that drank wine whenever she wanted, smoked her entire pregnancies (all 3 times), ate what she wanted, etc and all of her girls are as healthy as can be. I think that your little girl will be just fine.
curlimama05 likes this.

Jamie age 37-Single mommy and loving life
Tristen James born 10-28-00
Logan Boyce born 1-19-04
Brayden Monroe born 8/2/07
Sophia Elizabeth born 10-4-2103
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July 9th, 2013, 05:45 AM
Lemon's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,088
Congrats and welcome.

I'm sure it's scary, but I bet baby is doing great in there! Keep us posted.
angela - mom to joey (8) and emma (4) and william jude (10/16/13)
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July 9th, 2013, 07:07 AM
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,893
Congratulations and welcome! This is my first, so I don't have any personal anecdotal evidence, but it does seem that there are plenty of people who drink throughout and the babies do just fine. Would it be possible to have a 4D in a few weeks? Maybe seeing baby look like baby would help ease your mind...?
gRod likes this.

"He's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen." ~ Forrest Gump
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July 9th, 2013, 07:48 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,753
No experience, but support :hugs:

I know it must be scary, but it looks like everything is ok and the things that can happen you've managed to avoid. Also, now that you know at 20 weeks you can avoid all that stuff for the remainder of your pregnancy. I'm sure it will all be ok, but totally understand why you're freaking.
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July 9th, 2013, 08:03 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 5,298
There is a mom in my moms club who drank one glass of wine a week her entire pregnancy. Her doctor said it was fine. Her baby turned out healthy.

If you watch that show "I didn't know I was pregnant" they all feel as you do. Thankfully your baby is ok and hopefully one day you will be about to see this as a funny neat story.
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July 9th, 2013, 10:35 AM
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 12
Thank you ladies for the warm welcome and support! It really helps ease my mind. I've worked with many babies born to drug and alcohol addicted Moms so I think that has a little to do with my possible over reaction and anxiety. I have so many people saying, "Back in the 60's women..." Or my favorite was, "My friend drank like a sailor and..." She knew and she did what!!!? None of those things ease my mind. The only thing that helps is that there is research that says among women who drink during pregnancy only 15% are born with FAS of those 15% 12% of those mothers who consumed 17+ drinks a week. 3% had multiple binge episodes throughout. While I would qualify mine as binge, I would not say its been a constant thing nor will I ever ever do it from here on out. I did call my ob who has to think I am nuts and request an ultrasound Thursday. Lol she said, "I know if I don't do it you will find a way." I was like, yes, probably. I think a 4d would help a ton. All I know is whe Harper is finally here I will tell her she topped the list as biggest surprise blessing of my life. She has survived the odds of an iud failure, inhospitable environment since Mommy didn't know and a pretty intense workout schedule. Lol it makes me dream of what type of person she will turn out to be! Committed and persistent thus far! I'm happy to be here with you ladies. Hopefully my experience will help ease and support you as well. On an up note, my one surviving ovary obviously does ovulate occasionally. Even if it is only once or twice a year without clomid. That's got to be hope for someone, right? Lol
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July 9th, 2013, 10:44 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Indiana, USA
Posts: 7,185
Congrats! What a wonderful surprise that must have been. I totally understand your worry. But like you said, research proves that its not so bad at the levels you consumed. I take a swig of beer from my husband's bottle every time he cracks one open, which is approximately a couple every one or two weeks. I just like the taste of beer. I tried to drink a half glass of wine when I was 16 weeks but the first couple sips made my muscles loosen up too much and actually start to ache, and I stopped. Well my point is, I do not believe alcohol is taboo during pregnancy at all!
Expecting baby girl September 29th

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July 9th, 2013, 10:55 AM
Spyctre's Avatar Arwen
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Freaking Louisiana
Posts: 9,231
I sort of know what you are going through, only I didn't find out till 8 weeks. I have never been drunk, but I was drinking what I consider heavily. I was on a Mojito kick. I normally just drink 1 oz of hard stuff at a time, but this time I was getting doubles. That entire pregnancy I craved alcohol. Weirdest thing.

I read an article recently--could have been on JM--how a study has shown that children whose mothers drank a little when pregnant have great balance. Funny because that child of mine has the balance of a cat now. Her sister herp derps all over herself constantly(only had a glass of wine once), but the baby I drank with is a little gymnast. I drink sometimes now. I crave wine coolers every now and then. Better than my first. I felt like an alcoholic then. I woke up thinking about booze. Went to sleep wishing I was drinking. All went away the day I gave birth.

Anyway, my first ended up having Autism, but last I checked that was a bit different than FAS. Congratulations on your surprise baby girl! I'm having my 3rd girl AND LAST CHILD FOR SURE.
James Arwen est. April 2, 2005
Alice Marie - January 9, 2008
Winter Rose - February 14, 2012
Liliana Vale - September 25, 2013

Daniel Constantine - July 19, 2016
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July 9th, 2013, 11:00 AM
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 12
My Mom told me she had a glass of wine every few nights with all six of us and we are fine. I tease her that maybe that's what's wrong with us! Lol. Also, something I didn't know until recently is that my Oma drank heavily while pregnant with all three of her children (my Dad's Mom) and all of them are successful, great people. I knew she passed away from liver am kidney disease/failure but its always been hush hush as to why. Given that generics play some role, I am a tad bit comforted by that. I think drinking during pregnancy is very taboo in America because there is such a tendency for abusing it. For my Mon it was encouraged for blood flow and to relax her because she always had premature labor (remember this is 70's and 80's) as for Oma I believe she was a victim of her raising and circumstance. A soft hearted, kind woman that grew up in poverty and was abused her whole life. I truly believe she did the best she could.
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July 9th, 2013, 11:06 AM
MrsPea's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Somerville, MA
Posts: 1,946
Congrats and welcome! What a story, and a miracle baby! This is my first, but all I can say is don't beat yourself up over something you can't change. You didn't know and you lived your life accordingly, now you know and are living your life as a pregnant woman, make peace with that.

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July 9th, 2013, 11:22 AM
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: CA
Posts: 1,228
Sounds like you know the stats - it takes a pretty serious amount of chronic alcohol use to cause a real threat. Know that in many countries in Europe, women never stop having a glass of wine with daily meals. Our country's paranoia of alcohol is more likely a symptom of our Puritan philosophical ancestry more than it is of any alcohol-based epidemic of birth defects.

I've given up beer and wine altogether, but only because they make me feel funny now - but I think that's got more to do with my weightlifting than it does with my pregnancy (it makes my recently-challenged muscle groups feel sore in the way your leg feels when it comes back from having gone to sleep), otherwise you can bet I'd be having the occasional drink whenever I **** well please. The pearl-clutching and widespread infantilization of pregnant women in this country gives me the willies, and I take no part in it. I *gasp* occasionally eat deli meat WITHOUT microwaving it first! Worst. Mom. Ever.

Anyway, congrats on not dying and instead having a new bundle of joy! I bet that's an incredible and awesome relief and welcome aboard, btw. No judgement here; we're glad to have you.

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July 9th, 2013, 12:18 PM
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 12
I ate a boiled hot dog today. Lol! I agree that our country practices a bit of over kill especially against pregnant women. I've lived years with lupus and warnings for my disregard for traditional treatment. Guess what? No major issues! Lol I control my diet, exercise and mental health therefore I don't feel the need for massive doses of painkillers and steroids. I prefer my sane mind (well mostly sane), my nursing career and living normally. While I certainly don't condone moderate alcohol use, I certainly don't judge a glass of wine with dinner while pregnant. They do it in Brasilia and Germany where my family is from.
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July 9th, 2013, 12:44 PM
anothermother's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Southwest, Missouri
Posts: 6,062
Wow! Congrats! That's so exciting! Definitely a way better diagnosis then lupus or something else I'm sure your precious baby girl is perfectly fine in there. Babies are already pretty resilient and if she's gotten this far without an issue I'm sure she's fine. Looks like you are going to have the shortest pregnancy (or so it would feel like) than any of us here!
Christine, momma to Chloe [7.20.07], Alexis [9.8.09], and Jude [10.14.13]

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July 9th, 2013, 01:55 PM
JeCaLe's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Indianapolis
Posts: 4,920
Welcome and congrats!
Sarah, wife to Brandon (since 7/7/07), mother to
James (8/30/09), Corbin (9/1/11), and Lily (10/5/13)

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