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All but standing over him! Advice needed

Forum: Children With ADHD


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April 7th, 2010, 12:18 PM
Momeejenjen's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Okay.. Back story. My son was diagnoised with ADHD around 6 years old.... we went to several doctors... several evaluations.. many meetings in the principles office/councilers office at school.

Finally I thought we had him on a good med and things were good.. but aparently it seemed the meds stopped working as well so we switched, love the new meds.. he seems more like my son... just not so hyper and distracted. We have him on Vyvannse... its one of those meds that you take in the morning and its worn off by the end of the day.

The medicated times are fine.. the unmedicated times are hell on earth (pardon my use of words here)

Mornings are painful! We have to all but stand beside him and walk him through each step of the morning. I can't simply say "Go brush your teeth" he will go stand in the bathroom for 45 minutes staring in the mirror... I'll walk in, hand him the tooth brush and remind him to brush... he will then put the tooth brush under the water and leave it there for 10 minutes. This is with EVERYTHING he does... breakfast, a nightmare, getting dressed, a nightmare. My daughter of course gets herself ready and is practically out the door with you saying nothing more than "get up" and she's only 7. My son has to be reminded SEVERAL times... it's the same thing every morning. I put his clothes out in the same place, he gets up at the same time, we have the same routine every morning. Get up, eat, brush your teeth, get dressed, do your hair, get your shoes on, go to school. It never changes.

Do you have any suggestions that have helped you? I don't want to do everything for him because it's teaching him nothing.... My husband gets VERY frustrated because he doesn't understand. I explained to my husband that its as if our son has 10 voices in his head all talking to him about different things, all equally important all while he is trying to focus on what he knows he should be doing.

I will be staying home after June (when this baby is born) so I will be handling everything again, right now I rely on DH a lot and it's very difficult for him, his patience level is no where near that of my own, and I know when I get frustrated, he is 10x worse than me.
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April 7th, 2010, 08:43 PM
lovemyboysandabbey2's Avatar Platinum Super Mommy
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wow, I could have written that!! lol
2 of my boys are ADD/ADHD and I am in the same boat, they are awful in the mornings until they meds kick in, and the same again at night when the meds wear off. I wish I had some advice, but I just kind of hold my breath through those times. lol
I try and remind myself that most of the time they really can't control what they are doing, but yes, it's very hard.
I have to tell them a million times to do stuff, settle down yadda yadda, it's very frustrating.

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April 17th, 2010, 01:36 PM
Linzie's Avatar Veteran
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I went through the same thing with my son. He's 9 now, got diagnosed with ADHD last year (DH had him tested a few years before i came into the picture, and it came up negative) and is on the same medication Vyvanse (i LOVE it!) He takes a 30mg in the morning, and 20mg at 3 in the afternoon, and, unfortunately, a 10mg Clotodine to help him sleep. After his medicine wears off it like all the energy he had COMES OUT and before we got him on the sleep pill, he would lie awake for hours after we sent him to bed.

Anyway, before the medication Pierce would do that same thing. Take FOREVER to to one thing, get distracted and goof off or just stand there staring off into space. So we started giving him an incentive to be on time and to do what he's told without us telling him over and over. We started punishing when he had to be told more than twice, using a strike system. We took away one privilege for each strike he got. It took a while for him to get used to it, but now, he wants his outside time, his video games and his toys more than he wants to goof off.

Have you put consequences into place? I've found that giving him something to work for (not losing his fun time) worked really well with him. Yes, they do have ADHD, and yes, it is harder for them to control themselves, but they CAN. We do not allow him to use his ADHD or missing his medication as an excuse to do/act whatever he wants.

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