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What to do when the teacher can't handle ADHD effectively?

Forum: Children With ADHD


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April 17th, 2010, 12:45 PM
mom2more's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 2,692
My situation is that my son is in 5th grade and was diagnosed this year with adhd. Since he was little I knew in my heart he had it, his father was on ridlin as a child for it and so was my own father. I knew it was hereditary and I knew the signs. My son's case was manageable though. He was hyper and needs lots of reminders, but overall he is a wonderful child. He is caring and empathetic and not really impulsive in a dangerous way.

Anyways in 3rd grade I started seeing problems in school, but he also had an awful teacher. She was very old school, the type who wanted a child to sit perfectly still in his chair for 8 hours without a peep. The type who assigned homework over the weekends and during school holidays. Many parents that year had issues with this teacher, so I felt that it was more the teacher than my son.

4th grade came and I continued seeing academic difficulties. I was helping him a lot at home with his work and his teacher was wonderful. He did well, but it took a lot of work on his part. His behavior was good overall, with occasional incidenses that the teacher talked to me about and I dealt with my son on. This year I contacted the principal and requested an evaluation for special education and related services. I knew he needed more help. His new teacher said how wonderful he was and how great he was doing and that there was no need and they denied my request. I told them it was the beginning of the year and the material was review so that is why he was doing so well. AFter 1st quarter his grades were slipping and I again requested an evaluation. They again turned me down and tried saying he was only struggling with homework because he wanted my attention!! THE NERVE!! So I got an advocate. I went to the pediatrician and after a few visits and many rating scales he diagnosed my son with adhd.

The teacher was given rating scales to fill out. Around this time she had been e-mailing me about my sons behavior problems, inability to focus, lack of work completion, high frustration levels, etc. But when she filled out the rating scales she put the opposite. I showed my pediatrician this discrepency and he was shocked by it! He said it was as if the teacher was trying to just say my son was lazy so she did not have to do anything different for him.

My advocate and I met with the special ed team and his teacher again to request an evaluation and finally the agreed. They also created a 504 plan for him (though they attempted to get us to set up another meeting to do so and my advocate said we needed to do it then!). Since then (February) I have been fighting with the school to get them to follow the plan. And a wierd coincidence is that since I have been constantly at the school pushing them to follow the plan my son keeps getting in trouble at school. He is written up weekly since, sometimes more than once per day. He has had detentions.

Just last week his write ups were for: not reading aloud to his class loud enough after his teacher told him to read louder, riding his bike on school property (they are allowed to ride bikes to school but even though this was my sons first time this year doing so he was supposed to know that he had to walk his bike completely off property before getting on it....he says he was at the edge), and he got written up for only bringing one piece of paper to detention. When he used both sides of the sheet he got written up because he should have been more prepared!!! ***.

I have requested meetings with the principal, school psychologist, and all his teachers (classroom ,art, pe, etc). The principal told me that we have to do it for the 20 min before school because she can not keep teachers longer than their contracted times. And the principal claims we can't meet during the school day because she can not pay subs to go to their classes for this meeting!

So Monday morning I meet with just the classroom teacher, principal, and the school psychologist is supposed to be there. I requested this meeting to discuss his behaviors and what the school could do differently because all these write-ups are doing is making him hate school and feel bad about himself.

Has anyone else gone through this?? I have had it with this school!! And his principal is being demoted to classroom teacher after this year.... probably because she is useless.
This year has been such a struggle and so much time has been wasted by this school.

Last edited by mom2more; April 17th, 2010 at 12:48 PM.
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April 21st, 2010, 07:52 PM
lovemyboysandabbey2's Avatar Platinum Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: wisconsin
Posts: 82,834
wow! I am so sorry you are having to go through with that!! I am VERY lucky and both my boys' schools' are VERY supportive they have always worked with me to help my kids, the teachers, principal and counselor.
is there another school you could switch too that works more with ADD kids?

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April 21st, 2010, 09:57 PM
mom2more's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 2,692
I wish there was. But the only other schools near me are both catholic schools and I know people who have kids there. I think that the teachers there are more strict and even less able to deal with adhd.

I met with the principal, school psychologist, and classroom teacher the other day and again voiced my concerns. We all agreed that a more positive approach to my son might work and they agreed to try. Then the next day he came home from school and told me how he spent an hour in the principals office because he kept asking his teacher to help him with an assignment he was struggling with. The teacher got mad and marched him down to the principal! I called the school because I was upset that nobody called me about this. The teacher said that my son could do the assignment on his own and did it in the principals office. When I asked my son about it he said the principal answered the questions he had and that is how he got it done. So if the teacher would have just helped him then this would not have happened (my opinion).

So I called the superintendant and requested a meeting with her. I am sick of this!! I told her that I felt his rights were getting violated and that he was being punished for having adhd. We meet next week. Hopefully she will straighten her employees out!
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May 11th, 2010, 08:18 PM
missy123's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Savannah GA
Posts: 13,418
I would document everything and call the local newspaper and a lawyer. Your son is being mistreated, and the school HAS to follow his 504 plan by law.

I am really outraged that a school system would treat your son this way? Writing him up for 1 piece of paper??? With ADHD he is lucky he remembered to bring 1!

I am so sorry you are going through this.

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