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Kind of scared to get first AF post m/c

Forum: Recurrent Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss


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June 23rd, 2006, 09:45 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Midwest
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Now that I'm starting to feel better emotionally, I'm beginning to fear getting my first post m/c AF. I didn't have one between m/c's and having read such varied reports of what yours were like, I'm getting nervous. I've always been a 28-29 day girl and hate "not knowing" in pretty much any situation, but especially one like AF. I really don't want to walk around wearing liners for weeks on end, wondering/hoping/fearing when AF will start. With my luck it will be in the most inconvenient place and at the most inconvenient time (like when we're driving through western KS next weekend with nowhere to stop). It seems like such a silly thing to be afraid of, but I'm TERRIFIED. I don't like pain, very rarely get AF cramps (maybe 5 times in my 23 years of AF), and quite a few of you have reported severe cramps with first AF. I'm usually heavy for 5 days, then spot for 2-3 more, so if it's worse than that I'm not sure I can cope. I guess I'm also afraid of having to deal with AF and whether (probably) it will be too much of a reminder of my first m/c. And OMG what will I do if anything resembling a clot shows up?! And is it OK to use tampons or do I still have to use pads for this one? OK, I've gone from "kind of scared" in the topic title to full on panicked!!

Do not sorrow; the joy of the Lord is your strength." Neh. 8:10
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June 23rd, 2006, 03:59 PM
srs srs is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2006
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You know, I was really apprehensive about my first af after mc too, and it was totally normal. The second one was weird (it was only 22 days later, which wasn't totally out of the ordinary for me, but it only lasted two days and was really light). After that they were pretty normal flow wise, although I had some spotting mid month twice, and they were totally irregular! Anywhere from 22 days to 34 days, and I used to be a very consistent 24 day cycler. Actually, when I started ttc I was so happy to have short cycles because it is a total pain when you are a teenager or not ttc,, especially because I get menstrual migraines, so it seemed like finally something good was coming out of it. But alas, I am now totally irregular and don't know if I will ever see the regular short cycle again, and I get much worse cramps since the mc. I hope your experience is better that mine has been!

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June 23rd, 2006, 07:26 PM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Michigan
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I think for the most part - it seems most women (including me) report cramping before that first AF really shows - so I don't think it will show up & shock you. I was achy for a day or 2 & got worse as it started..but I have a hostory of bad AF's so I'm not a great judge. My first mc wasn't worse than the worst AF I've ever had - physically of course..but the 2nd & third were worse & I was farther along with the first than I was in the second & the first was twins. I think each follow-up AF has been a little different too. This last time (my most recent cycle) I cramped 3 days prior to AF & for 2 days after - it stunk..and much longer than normal for me to cramp..but I have quit counting anything & I think it was cycle 3 - but I couldn't promise. Each time though I have had a bad AF following - but it wasn't always the first AF & although I have had clots following, they have been really small by comparison & I had clots occassionally before any of this - so that too was no suprise to me. I was suprised it wasn't worse. I hope your comes soon & is easy on you.
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June 24th, 2006, 10:04 PM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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So if I'm "lucky" I'll get cramps to forewarn me of the impending AF, which means I shouldn't have to wear liners for a month (that whole "hate not knowing thing" I have). I'll still probably take a suitcase of assorted products with me on vacation, just in case. I guess I'm still terrified, but now better informed. Thanks so much for being so open about your experiences. I really don't know why this has me so freaked out, but it's really bothering me.
Do not sorrow; the joy of the Lord is your strength." Neh. 8:10
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June 26th, 2006, 10:06 AM
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I'm dreading it. My 1st AF after my 1st loss was horrible. I have Endo and deal with cramps on a regular basis but these were the worst intense cramps I've had since I was a teenager. I was throwing up and in complete pain for 2 days.

I'm hoping it's not like that this time. I started having some dull cramps today but I'm not holding my breath just yet. I can't afford to take any time off work and hope that if it happens it will be during a weekend. I'm also nervous of my cycles not returing to normal. I had 32 day cycles and O'd every CD18 and got the same temp the day after and now I'm worried that everything will be out of whack.
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June 26th, 2006, 11:27 AM
fallsbaby's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 333
MMMM..maybe I shouldnt post this...but I want to try to be helpful.
After losing Brennan on April 15, I starterd bleeding (obviously) as I had just given birth. Then a week later we realized I had a retained placenta and needed an emergency D&C on April 24th. Then I had continuous bleeding for most of May. The beginning of the last week of May it seemed to have lightened up, and then toward the middle of the week I was full out bleeding again. My doc figured I had AF. So I was expected my next AF the last week in June.

OK here's my point....
My brother got married on Friday (June 23rd). I wore a white dress. During the reception AF started!!! OK so whats up with that? Was this my first AF?? OR why did I get another AF 3 weeks later??

WHO KNOWS...best advise, just be ready for it. I didnt have "anything" with me, and luckily the reception was at a country club where they had a basket of "supplies" in the bathroom. THANKFULLY the white dress is still white!

I hope this doesnt scare anyone. I really just wanted to share my experience.
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June 26th, 2006, 11:32 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Midwest
Posts: 10,732
OH, that would be my luck. I'm really figuring she'll show up while we're out hiking or something, when I have supplies, but nowhere to go to use them! I'm really trying to enjoy my upcoming vacation, if only I KNEW that AF wouldn't show, I'd be able to really relax.

And I've already packed my bag of AF supplies! Just need to add some tylenol to go with it.
Do not sorrow; the joy of the Lord is your strength." Neh. 8:10
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