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nicu frustrations

Forum: Natural Childbirth


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February 7th, 2010, 09:35 PM
danischmell's Avatar Regular
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: SLC, UT
Posts: 57
I know this doesn't really have much to do with natural childbirth.. but I'm so frustrated! And I can't think of a better set of women to understand and appreciate what is frustrating me.

My dear friend just gave birth to twins last Tuesday. She fought to give birth vaginally, her doc wanted to just schedule her a c-section, but in the end she had them quite easily on her own. The little girl was 5lbs 3oz and is doing perfectly fine. The little boy however was breathing kind of fast and the nurses went back and forth and finally decided to put him in the nicu. Since then his breathing has slowed and is now perfectly fine.

However, they will not let him leave. He's not really eating well from a bottle. He's nursing like a champ. However the little girl is home, and so my friend can't stay at the hospital to nurse him every time he needs to eat so they have him on a feeding tube and whenever she's not back in time. The little girl is smaller and has to eat every 2 hours, and so she's racing back and forth between her house and the hospital (at least half an hour each way) all day long. They won't let him go home until he can be off the feeding tube fore 48hrs, but they aren't giving him the chance to because its so much easier to just feed him through the tube when she's not there.

I'm sooo frustrated for her. She's so upset that her poor little guy is just sitting in his little plastic bed all day long, no one holding him except for when she can run down. Her husband has hardly seen him at all because they have other children at home that he has to stay with while she goes to feed him. The older children have never seen him, and he's been parted from his twin sisters since the moment they were born.

Makes me want to go down there and swipe the baby. I bet you anything if they'd just let her take him home he'd do so much better. I swear, it seems like sometimes nicu's are holding kids hostage!!

argh. Sigh.. phew. Sorry.. Thanks for letting me vent.
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February 7th, 2010, 10:04 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 1
god! that would make me crazy!!! i'm sorry! i want to help swipe him!!!

Thank you Kiliki for my first beautiful Siggie!

mom of 2 angels and an earth baby
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February 8th, 2010, 06:34 AM
TheOtherMichelle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 8,765
That's so awful! Can she get her pedi to intervene?

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February 8th, 2010, 08:12 AM
Tiff802's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Georgia
Posts: 15,290
Oh my goodness!!! That is so sad! Makes you wanna cry! Keep us posted.

Thank you for my beautiful siggy Vicki!

See my growing belly!

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February 8th, 2010, 08:28 AM
moon~maiden's Avatar Cheryl~ birth truster
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: south eastern Mass
Posts: 13,088
my heart aches just reading that....what a nightmare!!! I agree, someone needs to get involved. It makes me so worried to hear about babies spending the beginning of their lives alone like that.
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February 8th, 2010, 08:57 AM
oriel13's Avatar Tishauna
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ohio
Posts: 6,250
Wow, that is awful. I feel so bad for all of them, I can't imagine how frustrated and helpless they must feel. I don't know if their pedi can do anything but it would be something if he/she at least tried!

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February 8th, 2010, 12:52 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Northern VA
Posts: 2,727
I'd terrorize my pedi every hour on the hour until I either got my little boy or a darn good explanation. She can't sign him out "against medical advice"? At least in the hospital my Mom worked at, they couldn't just hold someone hostage.
Thank you Jaidynsmum for my siggy!
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February 8th, 2010, 01:00 PM
danischmell's Avatar Regular
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: SLC, UT
Posts: 57
i told her she should try something like that, but she's afraid about what if he's really not ready.. the doctors are giving her all kind of guilt trips
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February 8th, 2010, 04:05 PM
PixieQueen's Avatar Hi-Tech Hippie
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Richland, WA
Posts: 6,038
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If he's nursing so well, why aren't they bottle feeding him? My daughter was in the NICU for a few days and they never gave her a feeding tube. She was bottle fed if she wouldn't breastfeed, and I pumped (I know that with the girl eating so frequently this may not be possible) so that she at least was getting breastmilk. They also wouldn't release my DD until she was eating well, but they wouldn't cut down her fluids so she was hungry, and they chose her eating schedule and then would tsk tsk at me when she wouldn't bf. Well, what if she isn't hungry when YOU want her to be? I'm convinced my DD should have come home 2 days sooner, so I understand her frustration!

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February 8th, 2010, 04:40 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 2,797
Sorry. How frustrating. I hope she can get some intervention soon.
Jesus loving, homeschooling, gardening lover, devoted wife to a wonderful hubby and 10 kids, ages 13 down to 12.5 months . We are expecting number 11 due January 1st, 2015.

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