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it just hit me nearly 2 years later

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January 30th, 2008, 03:09 AM
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I wasnt sure where to post this but I feel like I owe it to the baby I lost.

I was 19 and it was the March of 2006. I was on birth control and my period was 16 days late. What I thought was my period came and went very lightly. Until early May..I can't even remember the day..but I started to feel extremely nauseated at work. I go to the bathroom and there was blood everywhere. I rush home and have the worst cramping I ever felt..I didn''t know what was happening I thought it was a horrible period but the pain would not subside.. Later that day I found a lot of tissue.. tissue that I am sure was my baby. I feel so badly that I decided to block it out and act like it never happened. And I am just now allowing myself to mourn this person. After experiencing the joy of my son.. I know that he wouldnt be here had that baby survived.. but I still am sad for the loss of that baby..I dont even really know what to say other than I am sorry..I wish I knew you were there.. I wish I had taken better care of myself for your sake.. but thank you for Gabryel
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