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Mama2Twiggles~Journey Gaia

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February 18th, 2007, 12:08 PM
debdeb's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Sweet Home Alabama
Posts: 1,716
Alright Im going to try and get through this without falling to pieces...

Saturday morning of the 3rd, I had just woken up it was about 7am. I was going down stairs bc DH wanted some coffee. At the top of my stairs I just missed a step. I fell down the rest of that flight and was slammed into the railing below me. I started screaming for Andy, he came running out. I tried to tell him through tears that I fell down the stairs, that I didnt think the baby was okay. I was so paniced. I didnt know what to do. Andy called our neighbor so we could take the girls over there. I then realized that I was having contractions. Not painful ones, but just alot of pressure. I called my mw to let her know we were going to the hopsital and to meet us there.

The car ride was the worst. I was so upset and DH was wonderful, trying to keep me calm. I knew I had lost the baby. I just knew in my heart. We got to the hospital in 20 minutes, DH was driving so fast, I was worried that we would get pulled over!!

We got there at 7.40am ish. Once we got there I was given an u/s right away. The tech was very quiet and I knew. She turned off the machine and let us know that Journey had passed. She left DH and I alone to greive for a bit. My mw came in about 10minutes later, and told us how sorry she was. She told us we had a few choices and that we could take as long as we wanted, but I knew today was the day, and asked how we wanted to continue. I told her I wanted to hold her, I wanted to see her, and that I wanted to give birth to her. DH supported me 100% with this choice.

At 8.30am I was taken to my room on L&D. They put this stuff in my cervix that would make it dialate, and to make my contractions stronger. ABout 5 hours later, I was in alot of pain, I had the choice of an epi but just like with my twins I wanted a birth with no pain meds. At 1pm my water broke. I broke down crying. My mw tried to convience me again, to have an epi that soon it would be to late. I knew I didnt want one though. This was still the birth of my child. I wanted to feel it. Around 2.30pm I started to feel the urge to push. It was so surreal. I again broke down. I told the nurse and she called my mw. I told her to go home cuz it might be a long wait. I wanted to wait until she had arrived back. At 2.45 my mw walked back into the room and I started pushing. It was hardest thing of my life. Knowing that my baby was going to be born soon, but she would be sleeping. At 2.56pm excatly Journey just like slide out of me.

The doctors took her and cleaned her up. DH went and took some pictures. DH announced that she was a girl, and Journey Gaia, just struck me. DH brought her over to me for me to hold. And she was so beautiful! My mw asked me her name and I told everyone in the room that she would be named Journey Gaia, because Gaia, meant Earth and her Journey on Earth was cut to short.

I went home the next day. I held Journey all day long. I will forever remember the feeling of her skin.
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April 10th, 2007, 06:58 PM
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 3
Alright Im going to try and get through this without falling to pieces...

Thank you so much for sharing your story as difficult as it was. I too gave early birth to a 20 week old and my experience was much like you described. He lived for 4 hours and then drifted to heaven. We buried him with his grandfather who had passed years before.

I went on to have 2 beautiful children, one of which would not be here if that other baby had made it full term. God really does know what he is doing.

I am replying to your post now, as I just discovered it. I had a natural miscarriage today - first pregmancy in 15 years. I posted my story in Natural miscarriages even though it was hard to do.

Congratulations on your current pregnancy - I will pray for you
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