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I'm so tired of MIL....

Forum: Inlaws


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May 4th, 2008, 04:10 PM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Indiana
Posts: 16,541
She has been guilt-tripping DH every time he gets on the phone because she wants us to come visit. They live in AZ and we live in IN. The last time we visited there was almost a year ago. But here's the deal, DH just got a new job in Oct. and we moved here from MI. He's a youth pastor. The church's official policy is that he doesn't get any vacation the first year, 1 week each year for the next 2 years, and 2 weeks after that. But they have been very nice. They let us take a week at Christmas because we don't have family around here so we went to MI for a few days and then to Chicago where DH's grandparents live to spend Christmas day with the ILs because they chose to go there for Christmas. If they had stayed in AZ, then we would have been able to go there for Christmas. And don't even get me started on that because they didn't arrive in Chicago until after my son went to bed on Christmas Day because of MIL when they were supposed to arrive the day before. So, this is our year to spend Christmas with my family and, by golly, we're using the vacation to go to FL with my family for Christmas. We don't want to take advantage of the church's generosity in giving us some time off even though their policy states we shouldn't get it. DH is also starting a Master's degree program in a week (and the church is paying for the whole thing!) so that also mean he won't have extra time because he will be doing this schooling. I can tell he feels badly that we can't go visit and has explained the situation to her repeatedly and told her she can come visit any time she wants ( thank goodness she hasn't taken advantage of that one!) and she still yaks at him about it. It makes me so mad! He is working hard, has a great job, and going to school for his Masters! Give him a break why don't you?!

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May 4th, 2008, 05:15 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Fort Myers Florida
Posts: 1,871
That is just how they are. It is all about them. At least they are not close by. Mine are 5 minutes away and are here now! Im ready to scream.
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May 4th, 2008, 05:18 PM
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Texas
Posts: 232
They can't take a hint, can they? I sure wouldn't give up Christmas with your family either! That's rude if she expects you to.
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May 4th, 2008, 06:25 PM
Jessica!'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 6,353
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I live in Arizona. Do you want me to goto her home and knock some sense into her? lol

I agree with you. I don't understand why you guys have to drop everything in your life just to come down to Arizona. Plane tickets are VERY expensive right now. Who can really afford them to begin with?! If she can afford it, or even afford to drive up there, why not just do that? She needs to understand that you have a very busy life with a kid and your DH going to school now.

Some people.....

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May 4th, 2008, 09:47 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,812
my mil seems to think we should take turns so scecne she was hear last now we need to come to her, she is hours away but i hate being at her house she has towels tacked up oer her windows so no sunlight can get in, you hae to hae shoes on the whole time becaue her wood floors are splintering and id generally unsafe for kids
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May 5th, 2008, 11:30 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: CO
Posts: 1,848
That would definately bug me...but she won't let up. My in laws are close by, but thank god my sister in law is 24 hours drive away. She wants us to visit, but we are not going to visit Mexico just for her. I already told DH if we go to Mexico its to spend with his grandpa ALONE, if she wants to see us she can go there. DH feels bad about it sometimes but truthfully he knows I'm going out on a limb just going to Mexico (I don't really care to leave the US lol) so he tells his sister no, and even tho she don't give in he always says something mean "Its not always about you, there are other people out there that we can visit and will visit before you." Then I feel bad but not that bad lol

I just hope she does understand though.
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May 5th, 2008, 04:15 PM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Indiana
Posts: 16,541
Unfortunately we can't use cost as an out because they have always paid for our plane tickets to come see them. She's like, "We'll pay for it, so why can't you come?" Normally, every weekend I encourage him to call his parents because I think it's polite. But I've stopped doing that because I don't want him to have to hear it again. It's so sad when you don't even want to call your own mom!

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May 8th, 2008, 12:42 PM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Indiana
Posts: 16,541
He hasn't talked to her in a couple weeks. But he'll have to call her Sunday. Blah. I hope she doesn't mention it again.

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