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MIL Plans to Stay for 2 weeks!! Ugh!!

Forum: Inlaws


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August 26th, 2011, 03:12 PM
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Clarksville, TN
Posts: 15
I'm so annoyed and frustrated!
My MIL, who I don't have the best relationship with to start, told my husband that she's coming to stay for a couple weeks after I have the baby.
Um, thanks for asking ME!
Of course my husband backed me up and explained that it's not a good idea. So she freaked out, ranting and raving about how she's never going to see her grandchild!
First of all, she already has 2 grandkids, so this is not a new thing for her. Second, this is MY first child and I don't need the added stress of her being in my house after I've delivered my son.
I need to try to explain to her my POV, but she won't respond to my emails or texts. I'd call, but I doubt she would even pick up.

I guess what bothers me the most is that I don't have a very good relationship with my own mother, and I think having my MIL here would only exacerbate those feelings I have and bum me out.
I just want to enjoy my newborn, get to know my baby's routine and be a little selfish with my baby and husband for a while. Lol.
He's due in early November and we've already made plans for Thanksgiving with my inlaws, so all I'm REALLY asking for is 2 weeks, at least, to be alone with my new little family. And the ***** can't even give me THAT!
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August 30th, 2011, 09:08 AM
*Candi*'s Avatar Candi
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Ontario Canada
Posts: 8,645
that is so frustrating My MIL wanted to come a few weeks after my son was born and I told dh absolutely NOT. If I knew she would come and help with the things I wanted help with (Ie cooking, cleaning, laundry ect) and give me the time I want to bind with my son I would have accepted the help, but I knew she would just be all over the baby and create extra work for me. So I told her that I really wanted some time with just my son and I (and obviously dh) so we can get a schedule going ect before I start getting visitors. And then I planned to visit her at a set time so she would still 'get to see the baby'.

But i hear you, it SUCKS

Thank you GraysMama for an awesome siggy!

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September 3rd, 2011, 12:51 AM
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 27
I know how you feel. My parents will be here (which I dont mind of course), my boyfriend's parents will be (for the first couple of years my boyfriend and I were together, his mother was constantly nagging me about what I wasnt doing with my life and telling me what I SHOULD be doing with it, and cant keep her mouth shut to save her life), his brother and sister in law might be here (we asked them) and my grandmother invited herself down, but did it by telling my mother and I had to find out from her that my grandmother is coming down. I already know I'll get little if any time with the baby with all those extra people here and however I try to take care of it will probably be judged and I'll get "no you should do it this way, let me show you" or I wont even get a chance to do anything because everyone will probably feel the need to do it for me, especially my grandmother ugh. I dont know how long everyone plans on staying, but YAAAY. Oh I cant wait, not. It'll be a huge pain in the neck.
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September 3rd, 2011, 06:44 AM
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Clarksville, TN
Posts: 15
Wow, you're gonna have a full house! Lol
And I agree, when family comes to visit, it's hardly ever about the actual 'helping' but more about passing the baby around like a football. Which is fine but NOT the first couple weeks after you bring him/her home. That's bonding time for mommy, daddy and baby. I guess that's why I became so angry at my MIL, because I know her and I know I wouldn't be getting that. And the fact that she blew up and lost her mind only proves my point further. She doesn't care about what my hubby and I want, only about what she wants. Ugh. Family sucks sometimes. Lol
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September 3rd, 2011, 11:07 PM
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 27
Oh of course, I already know it's going to be hectic. I'm so glad my parents are the type that will ask if I need help before jumping right into something or wait until I ask them for help. Not too sure how his parents are but it's my grandmother that automatically jumps to "nana can fix everything let her do it for you". UUGH just go away, y'know?
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annoyed, child, inlaws, mil, rant

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