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Forum: Divorce and Separation


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May 3rd, 2010, 05:30 PM
Serenity13's Avatar Regular
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 73
Went to court today and they granted me my divorce, so in 30 days, once my attorney recieves my papers, I'm free! Excited because its been almost 3 years since this divorce was started... My question is I have been seperated from my ex for 4 years now and although I know I should of waited for my divorce to be final to start another relationship, I didn't... You can't help who you fall in love with... Anyways my boyfriend and I just had a baby in Jan which has my ex's last name because in the state of Tennessee, if you're still legally married, the child is considered your husbands... I need to know how to go about getting her name changed now that my divorce is final... Has anyone delt with something like this before? My ex isn't denying her to be my boyfriends... and my boyfriends not denying her... Can I file papers without an attorney? I just need to know what steps I need to take to change her last night to her daddy's!

Thank you so much to .h00dihoo.this. for my gorgeous siggy!

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May 4th, 2010, 04:39 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 2,091
Send a message via AIM to Blondzilla
It sounds to me like he may need to adopt her. Doesn't seem fair, but...
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May 5th, 2010, 09:55 AM
sunshine411's Avatar Let's go MAVS!!!!
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Where everything is bigger....
Posts: 5,894
Tennessee Department of Health: Vital Records

from everything I'm reading, you need to contact vital statistics and they will tell you how to go about changing it. In TX, all you have to do is have your ex sign a legal form that says he's not the father and your BF sign one that says he is. Some states require paternity tests, so you may have to do that too. In any case, call vital statistics, number is below:

Tennessee Department of Health: Vital Records
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May 6th, 2010, 05:34 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 9,310
I don't think he'll have to adopt but you may need to have to get a paternity test to prove that the baby is his (even though you know).

My 2 miracles: Lucinda & Noah
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May 7th, 2010, 04:03 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: none
Posts: 1,133
Im thinking paternity tests, too? Unless its legal in your state for one person to remove their name and add another name to the birth cert? OR...maybe your ex can claim he's not the father or dispute it, which would require a paternity test??

You can talk to an attorney in your state to see which route would be best...just my .02

Good luck!
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May 7th, 2010, 07:36 PM
Posts: n/a
That law is SOMEWHAT the same in Iowa, if you are legally married, your husbands name automatically goes on the birth certificate, BUT you can choose which last name you want your child to have, when I was still married to my ex, his name went onto Emory's birth certificate but I did not have to give him my ex's last name, so there for, he has my maiden name.

In your situation, you may want to contact the Department of Vital Records and ask them how you should go about your situation, just explain it to them and they should be able to direct you into the right direction. I don't think your BF would have to adopt her, but I do believe a paternity test may be required (even though you know he is her father) and there may be some steps requiring your ex husband to sign a legal document stating his not the father of your daughter!

Goodluck hon!
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May 10th, 2010, 11:25 PM
ZaydensMomma's Avatar Aaron Nicole
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Indiana
Posts: 16,454
this happened to my brother's EX.... she changed my niece's last name to her DH's last name. It was like a slap in our faces.

Age 36 with PCOS, poor ovarian reserve (.197), and blocked left fallopian tube.
We are TTC our 2nd blessing baby.
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May 11th, 2010, 10:11 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 9,310
Aaron Nicole, I think you misunderstood the situation. Serenity13's child isn't her soon to be ex's bio child. They were separated when she got pregnant with current guy. She wouldn't change the name if it was his kid. But it isn't. The true father needs to be on the birth certificate.

In your case, your brother can fight it. It isn't legal for them to change the name of his child without his permission. He may want to check because they couldn't do it legally so they may just be using the name without changing legal documents.

My 2 miracles: Lucinda & Noah
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