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I am paranoid about my Husband dying

Forum: Grief and Loss


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November 11th, 2011, 09:52 PM
~ Nicole ~'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 4,925
My family is cursed. All the men in my family have died or almost died young and I live in constant fear that my DH will die by age 50 and than I will be alone for half of my life. Well my dad died at 48 of a heart attack. My grandfather died of a heart attack in his 50's. My other grandfather died before I was born when a tree fell on his car while he was driving. My brother has bad cholestoral and can likely have heart probems young. My DH's father had a heart attack in his 50's and almost died. My sister's ex husband got in a car accident which killed the other driver and almost killed him than a few years later was working on his car when something caught fire and burnt him bad and burnt down their garage....

Now to my DH... he has horrible cholestoral since his early 20's and I live in constant fear of him dying of a heart attack also. Everytime he eats anything bad I panic and even cry sometimes. He is trying to eat better but I still panic. Than he gets mad when I try to control his eating all the time. He also drives a lot for work and I also feel paranoid about him getting killed in a car accident. I just feel like because of my family history and his health that he will definatly die young. I can't stand him even being gone for a day, how can I survive if he dies early.

Me(35) DS(12) DS(14)

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November 13th, 2011, 11:22 PM
mamma_anna's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 1,953
Just wanted to offer my thoughts and prayers for you.

I can relate to your fear. Loosing my husband is one of my greatest fears. (Loosing my children is another.) I have that same paranoia about car accidents. A lot lately. My oldest daughter just got her learners permit and two weeks later I was in an accident. I have a panic attack every time she gets behind the wheel now.

The only thing that eases my fear is prayer. I have to trust that God is in control not me. I hope you can get some comfort from that.
Take care of yourself as best you can too. This kind of stress can't be good for your heart either. And maybe your husband will pick up on your good habits.

Wish I had more to offer you.

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November 14th, 2011, 01:05 PM
dydy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,301
omg i could have writen this post my self , my family has the same history with men but they all died in different causes , my father died age 53 ( he was driving and became unconcious and crashed ) the have no idea with what he died yet but it was not the crash , my dh father died working on fire works at age 52 both my grandfathers and my dh grandfathers died before 60 and the list goes on ...... i use to feel anxious but now i just know that either him or me will die at arond that age i just have a feeling but i live my life to the full , i spend all the time i can with my kids because no one knows for sure when death comes . My only advise is live your life the best way that you can and dont worry too much because in the end you end up spending all your life wondering when you are going to die and not living it .
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