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The source of your sexuality?

Forum: LGBT Mommies and Mommies to be


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  • 1 Post By Galactic Som
  • 2 Post By Gray Sea
  • 1 Post By krissy1989

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February 27th, 2012, 03:45 PM
Galactic Som's Avatar is some kind of something
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 147
I'm about to get all philosophical up in this piece. So, don't mind me.

I'd like to believe that we as a society are heading back towards what Greece was as a culture. We are, for the most part, at the peak of our technological and psychological way. And with that, especially the latter, we're typically given more room to experiment and come across ourselves more easily than we would be able before. Greece naturally had a "have sex with everyone" sort of mindset when it came to love and sex. The rules were actually a lot more relaxed and the idea of man+man and woman+woman was typically met with more acceptance than anything else.

Before I make this any more confusing... It's a common debate of a persons sexuality either being hard wired since birth, or just being prone to it due to a life time of experiences; sort of along the lines of Nurture vs. Nature. We do know that homosexuality exists in a large number of animals, bugs, etc, but from a biological standpoint, it just wouldn't make sense for reproduction. And seeing that humans and dolphins are the only two to have sex just for the purpose of pleasure... well, hopefully you can see where I'm going with this.

But, to answer my own question, I believe it's a mix of both. Homosexuality is a natural thing, even if it doesn't really have much of a purpose biologically. But, I also believe that we as a society are reverting back to the "love all" mindset, because we're slowly becoming more accepting of the idea. With that comes more experimentation and so on. The only thing that can me kind of worrisome with this mindset is the new found hate on heterosexuality and being cigendered. (the Internets word for someone who is born into the correct gender, where has transgender is the opposite.) Which, unfortunately does happen, as ridiculous as it sounds.

So, yeah. Do you feel that your sexuality is something that was with you since birth, or something that was learned through your experiences over time?
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February 28th, 2012, 06:24 PM
Gaby&Emmy'sMama's Avatar aka NZ-Emma
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Christchurch, NZ
Posts: 56,618
For the most part I believe it is nature - BUT I do believe there needs to be the right 'conditions' for that aspect of ourselves to come out... I don't know if that makes sense AT ALL... I guess it's like you can be 'naturally' lesbian/homosexual/bisexual, but lets say you are brought up from a VERY early age to believe that anything other than man/woman relationships are evil and awful - well, perhaps you'll never explore your OWN not-quite-straight sexuality...

I don't feel that anything that has happened in my life 'caused' me to fall in love with women - someone asked me when I 'decided' to fall in love with women, and I could say very easily that I never decided to find women attractive, I didn't even decide to 'explore' being with women - it just happened naturally and it was something I just .... wanted...

I saw a really fascinating doco on whether sexuality is genetically linked, and I strongly believe it is!

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February 28th, 2012, 07:45 PM
Galactic Som's Avatar is some kind of something
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 147
I totally understand what you mean, no worries! You've got some pretty interesting theories and I think a pretty good way to look at things.

I often wonder about my own sexuality. For the longest time during my teens I wasn't really attracted to anyone, but there was a couple of years when I was only attracted to women(And I often times theorized that it was partially because of some bad experiences I had with men), but I was constantly trying to tell my mind that I was just attracted to men to make life easier. In all reality I feel that I kind of... grew into being attracted to men, because of how positively DF has effected my life and how deeply connected I feel to him. So, in turn, I often wonder if I hadn't met him would I still be attracted to men at all? Is it all conditional? Or was I destined from the beginning to be attracted to men and women? Who knows?

Hopefully I'm making some sense.
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Last edited by Galactic Som; March 4th, 2012 at 02:09 AM.
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February 28th, 2012, 08:21 PM
Gray Sea's Avatar I love Disneyland
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Santa Barbara, CA
Posts: 2,080
I know my sexuality is part of me. My nature. My DNA.
I have always been attracted to women, since I can remember.
As a child, I would always just stare at girls. Think how pretty their hair was, their eyes, their legs. Their hands. Never really thought of boys that way. Kind of in the sense 'boys are yucky' but, truly yucky, and not just because of my age.
I would spy on girls, when we went to the bathroom during recess. Which once, resulted in a face slap! LOL oopps.
I was a 3rd grader then! LOL

I love the Greek history, and their sexuality. I admire it!
If that culture was so accepting, so early in life, why are people now so grossed out by it? Or so deadset against it?
It's those Republicans! And have you noticed this closed mindness is mostly alive in the US??
I cannot wait til all states welcome and allow gay marriage.
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Thank you Tasha_Mae for my spooky siggy
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March 5th, 2012, 11:18 AM
krissy1989's Avatar is loving her two boys!
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: The Mountains
Posts: 8,110
Great topic! I definitely believe that I've always been this way. I was always really sexually-aware, even as a small child (my mom said I was humping the couch at the age of 2, LOL), and I knew from then on that I found women sexually attractive. My first childhood experiments (you know, the "I'll show you mine if you show me yours") were with the neighborhood girls. I can distinctly remember finding my uncle's Playboy when I was just 5 or 6 years old, and the only thing I was completely mesmerized with were the women. It was like the men were "just there." I could've cared less. I tried getting girlfriends multiple times as a young girl (like, age 8 or 9), but without any success. I've had more female sexual encounters than with men, and I was raised VERY strictly Christian. I knew from a young age that it was "wrong," and yet I couldn't stop myself no matter how hard I tried. So, for me, I definitely feel like it's more nature than nurture.
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March 5th, 2012, 10:38 PM
KiwiMommy's Avatar Ashlynn's Mama
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 3,863
I guess theoretically you could say my sexuality is based on "Daddy issues".. My father and my mother broke up when I was 9 months old and he was in and out of my life frequently.. But in the same respect, I have always been attracted to women as far as I can remember and never really noticed men a whole lot.. Ok.. MEN..as in the hairy, muscle-y creatures I have NEVER noticed. But there's a few "baby face" "boys" I've noticed.. My friend pointed that out a while back. Any man I've been with has been baby faced, no facial hair (or very little and mostly shaved) and NO chest hair.
And it's not that I didn't have men in my life. My grandfather was there from the moment I was born and we had an awesome relationship. My stepdad came into my life when I was 5 years old and he and I have had a rocky relationship, but he isn't a bad parent. I call him my parent. It's just my father that caused issues.
That aside, biologically my body says to be with a man. After all, it tells me (no, seriously... it DEMANDS) I need to have children and raise children. I get baby cravings. But then when my body is satisfied with it's biological needs, It could care less and I prefer women.
So I guess I'm a love-all type My body goes for emotional (women) and biological (men)
My SO and I are expecting a son right now and I'm usually pretty happy..just feeling an empty spot sometimes.
Hopefully I answered your question.. I got a bit sidetracked in watching SO die on his videogame

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March 15th, 2012, 07:15 PM
Clay and Carson's mommy
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 14,152
I absolutely believe it's in my DNA. I was 'that girl' who played with and watched Transformers and Thunder Cats,and played with the guys,etc. I was with girls up until I met DH,and I truly did not fall in love with him in a physical way at all,I fell in love with him as a person. I am as gay as one chick can gets
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