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Grandparent issues

Forum: Homeschooling


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July 5th, 2011, 08:56 PM
Jill0924's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Cape May, NJ
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My mom has not been happy with our decision to homeschool (going so far as to cry over not being able to see them perform in the first grade play - and this was just after they turned 1!). I have explained my reasoning, pointed out the things she has complained about in the public school (she was a teacher too), pointed out things I have seen occur in the higher elementary grades (she taught lower elementary), and then ignored a lot of it. I thought she was finally accepting our decision ...until today. The girls were telling her a story - weaving together several stories they have recently been read and using a ton of large vocabulary words correctly - and she says "Oh when you go to preschool next year you can be the teachers for the other kids!" Of course my automatic reply was "They won't be going to pre-k next year, they will be doing kindergarten here at home." Her reply: "Oh, you'll change your mind by then." .....WTH I haven't changed my mind since I first decided to homeschool my children 10 years before I ever had any, why would I change it now! Ok, if you made it this far, thanks ... I just needed to vent a little.

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July 6th, 2011, 06:40 AM
New_England_Girl's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Chilly New England
Posts: 6,767
(((HUGS))) I'm sorry she doesn't understand

I have a feeling, though, that as the girls get older and she sees not only how smart they become, but how well-adjusted and secure they are, she'll begin to change her mind!
Hi, I'm Sara. I used to post here a lot when I was having the kids, but life got busy and it's been years since I was around. Now I'm back, and happy to be here.

Married to my best friend for a decade.
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Cassidy, 6.5 yrs. Born 10/23/07, 7 pounds 10 ounces, 20 in.

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July 6th, 2011, 06:48 AM
Butter's Avatar Heather the Mama Duk
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: San Antonio TX
Posts: 28,853
Honestly, just ignore her for now. She is probably feeling a bit threatened that you are doing something with your kids that is completely different from what she did, plus homeschooling is completely foreign to her as a former public school teacher. My MIL used to make comments like that. She was 100% UNsupportive of homeschooling. Well, a lot of years have gone by now. We've just finished our 7th year officially homeschooling. And she's 98% supportive now! She's seen our kids over the years and has realized that what we're doing may be different form what she was used to, but it's definitely not bad and is turning out some well educated kids. When Cameron was diagnosed with dyslexia and dysgraphia, one of the first things she said was that it was a good thing I was homeschooling him so he doesn't fall through the cracks. She never would have said such a thing even 5 years ago. Sometimes we just have to give people time to see how it goes before we can expect them to support us completely. If her comments become too often, however, I would respectfully ask her to cut them out and remind her gently that these are your kids and you get to make the decisions for them. If the comments are few and far between like they were with my MIL, just ignore them and watch them change.

~Heather, wife to Jamie (15 years; June 5, 1998) and mom to
Ani - 14 (February 15, 2000), Cameron - 12 (October 3, 2001),
Fritz - 7 (July 11, 2006), and Adrian - 5 (June 19, 2008)
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July 6th, 2011, 08:44 PM
kalis's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: IL
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That must be frustrating!
Sorry - She will just have to get used to it and I'm sure she will quickly see the benefits of homeschooling as the girls get older and even smarter than they are already are.
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July 7th, 2011, 10:00 PM
Jill0924's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Cape May, NJ
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Thanks everyone. My mom can be so frustrating - we have a pretty strained relationship over lots of subjects and this is just another straw on the proverbial camel. I love her, but she drives me nuts!

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July 11th, 2011, 08:47 PM
BensMom's Avatar Ephesians 4:29
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: The Lonestar State
Posts: 50,214
My mom was the same way at first, but she's very supportive now, and even brags on us. (Also a teacher.) Results are what matter. Tell her it's not like you can't change your mind later, but then ignore her. ... oh, and join a HS group that does plays. There are several around here.
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July 11th, 2011, 09:35 PM
in_mommy's Avatar I am just me
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 14,873
Now wait a minute, whose mom are you talking about because it sounds just like mine!! I feel what your going through. I just ignore it anymore and doesn't make any of it any easier, but it is all I can do at this point.
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