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WWYD re: immediate family in 2 different states?

Forum: Wedding Planning


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January 11th, 2011, 02:11 AM
StephanieAZ's Avatar Expecting our 1st! :)
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Tucson, AZ
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The planning has BARELY begun and I'm already frustrated lol.

Okay, so DF is from Wisconsin. All of his immediate family (including his son) live in WI. All of my immediate family lives here in AZ.

I'm completely torn as to where to plan the wedding!

On one hand, I wouldn't really mind most of my family not coming... so it's ALMOST easy, but here's the problem: I refuse to get married w/o my grandparents (they raised me from 2 yrs old) in attendance. The obvious answer is to fly them to WI with us (we have a lot of family in Illinois that they could stay with/visit as well), BUT they also have a very sick dog that requires hand-feeding 3x per day (among other things), so I doubt my grandma would be able to leave her behind.

The other option would be to fly his mom and son (and possibly his best friend) to AZ and have the wedding here, but then the rest of his family wouldn't be able to come.

Ugh! WWYD or what have you done (if you're in a similar situation)?
It's a BOY! Charles Robert - EDD 03/27/16
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January 11th, 2011, 03:58 AM
CassCramer's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Tucson, AZ
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If you really want all of his family there, I would look into boarding the sick dog where it can receive the proper attention and care during your event. I'm getting married in South Carolina, and my mom and sister are here in Arizona, my dad is in New York, so I understand completely the frustration of people out of state that you really want there. Good luck with your decision.

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January 11th, 2011, 09:43 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: MN
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what state would you rather get married in? BTW im from MN and WI sucks ...
Anyways.. it really depends when your wedding is and what type of wedding you want a budget wise also...??

Does he want all his family there? is that important to him? also flying your grandma and doggie shouldnt be a huge issue if u wanna do that? or is there someone that to take care of the dog.

BTW i go to AZ every year in march also. i have family all around so understand your concerns

I have family in : AZ,fl,cali HI so feel your pain! and my BF had family i : cali and IL and WA..
so i hope it works out KUP
Single mommy to the most amazing child in this entire world!
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January 11th, 2011, 02:22 PM
Cassie.S's Avatar Proud Mommy!
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Illinois
Posts: 9,029
We had a destination wedding and although we had a fairly large group, there were family members that couldn't make it. We picked the place where we wanted our special day to be and knew that the family that really wanted to spend that day with us would be there.

This is a tough one. If it's most important to you for your grandparents to be there, I would talk with them and see if they would have someone to care for their dog and would be willing to fly out with you or not.

If not and you decide it's best to have your wedding in WI, just to throw out another idea, you could consider doing a "legal" ceremony in AZ with your grandparents to make it special for them and then have the full symbolic ceremony in WI.

Best of luck to you on making this decision!
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January 11th, 2011, 02:47 PM
StephanieAZ's Avatar Expecting our 1st! :)
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Tucson, AZ
Posts: 1,902
Thanks for all of the suggestions! I just had a "duh" moment and, after some research, our problem may be solved.

My grandfather is a retired minister and I want him to perform the ceremony, but he won't be able to do it in WI, afaik.

That's too bad b/c I really love the idea of renting a boat to get married on in WI.

Riverwalk Boat Tours & Rentals - Home

I'll have to give this some more serious thought.

Thanks again for your replies.
It's a BOY! Charles Robert - EDD 03/27/16
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