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Forum: Home Birth


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September 11th, 2008, 02:22 PM
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Hi all, I'm new to this board but not to JM.
I gave birth to my baby girl who is almost 8.5 months old now in a hospital but without any pain meds. Next time around I would love to do a home water birth and even found a husband and wife team of midwives in my area who do homebirths. I'm not pregnant yet and we're not planning on trying again for about 7 months or so (I want to try sooner but my husband wants to wait). Anyway, I've tried talking to my husband about having a home birth next time but he is not open to the idea really at all.
So, do any of you have any experience with this and if so, how did you get your DH to come around?
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September 11th, 2008, 02:56 PM
inyourhonor's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Metro Detroit
Posts: 16,734
My husband was against us having a home birth so much when I first brought it up to him. I didn't have an ideal first birth with my son, so my trust in hospitals was left to be very little. Also, I wanted to have a VBAC and where we moved to, the hospital wouldn't support my VBAC. Well, I couldn't find a doctor willing to take me as a patient and I refused to have another c-section.

So after much pushing of my husband to watch The Business of Being Born, I got somewhere. I got him to open his eyes and see that this was something I wanted and needed to heal for myself. He agreed to meet with a home birth midwife but he wasn't on board yet. Once he met with her, asked her all his questions and she told answered throughly and then some. We left the meeting with him looking at me (Before i could ask what he thought!) that he really liked her and to cancel my other appointment with the CNM. So, since that day, we've been planning a home birth for this November.

His hesitations were understandable. We were lead to believe something was wrong with our son and they needed to take him by c-section then. Nothing was wrong and his birth was a snowball effect. So he was nervous, he still is but he's more at ease and less stressed.
Marisa (29) married to J (35), mama to G (10), D (7), B (5) and K (1).
Little Miss joined our family Dec 4th, 2015 at 35 weeks.
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September 11th, 2008, 04:05 PM
thepinkleprechaun's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 10,988
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What she said!

My SO is totally laid back about this stuff, but watching the movie and having a meeting/consult with a midwife is a really good start. Midwives are used to DHs being a bit fearful of the whole process and they are very good at talking them around
Katie- mom to Aden (5) Phineas (3) and Phoebe Violet (1)
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September 14th, 2008, 01:27 AM
MrsPil's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Quad Cities
Posts: 1,305
I just told him it was my body and my choice. I asked what the reasons were that he wanted me to birth in the hospital and when none of them held up against logic and science, he said he would support me whatever way I chose to give birth.

Now he is a huge supporter of homebirth and can't see us doing it any other way.
"I trust birth—not birth attendants—for if you only trust birth that is attended then you really don't trust birth at all. You trust the attendant. And then you start over. Who? Doctor, surgeon, CNM, CPM, SIM? And it goes on and on...." - Carla Hartley
"First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." -Gandhi
"What good fortune for those in power that people do not think." - Adolph Hitler

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September 14th, 2008, 08:25 AM
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Cool beans! Good luck
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September 15th, 2008, 03:23 PM
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I talked to DH about it a little bit and he said if insurance will cover the birth center that he will go for that but I still have a long way to go to convince him of a home birth.
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