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Getting a little ahead of myself...

Forum: Home Birth


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March 8th, 2010, 11:29 PM
MrsSarah1's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: California
Posts: 2,617
We are a few years away from even TTC, let alone having another baby, but I think this next time around I want a home water birth. I've had TWO c-sections and our town is pretty much anti-vbac.. let alone home birth. This should be a difficult challenge.

I haven't even brought it up to DH at all yet (again, I have a few years to work on this) but because it's such an unknown territory to everyone here, I think he may not agree with this at all.

So what did you do in order to convince your husband/family members that this was the right thing to do? (I don't particularly need my family's permission, but their approval means a lot to me.)

I just feel like I had my childbirth experience stolen from me and the only way that I'll get the birth that I want is if I have a home birth with a midwife (there aren't any locally, but they apparently will travel).

Also, does health insurance typically cover midwives/home births at all?

A daughter is the happy memories of the past, the joyful moments of the
present, and the hope and promise of the future.
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March 9th, 2010, 06:57 AM
laisydaisymama's Avatar Natural Birth Junkie
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Texas
Posts: 22,043
first off, hi! lol, ok. the first thing I would do is talk to some midwives. Find out if they are comfortable with a vba2c, and if you are a good candidate. start bring it up to DH now, as a "maybe next time...so we can avoid the c-section" because he probably won't argue with a vague "maybe someday" type of thing, since it's not "relevant" right now. Get the idea in his head that this is something you are interested in. Feel him out and see if you are going to have to do some convincing. Don't argue about it, just see what his reaction is.

Talk to the midwives about insurance stuff, from what I have seen, it is more often NOT covered than covered. I am having to pay for mine out of pocket, but it's less of a big deal than we thought it would be. My midwife's fees are only a few hundred dollars more than my insurance deductible, so we are just about breaking even, and just paying it now instead of later.

as far as family support, once I explained how I felt when I was forced into a c-section, they backed off. They are slowly coming around, and probably still think I am crazy, but they aren't criticizing or judging.

I would just first broach the subject with DH, and find out what your options are, then go from there!

good luck!

homebirthing, tandem nursing, cosleeping, babywearing, picky vaxing, cloth diapering Christian doula mama


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March 9th, 2010, 07:25 AM
inyourhonor's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Metro Detroit
Posts: 16,734
My 2nd birth was a home birth after a precious c-section. I don't really live in an anti-vbac town however, the way I wanted to go with a midwife in the hospital they wouldn't get a doctor to back me up. So, I started looking into the home birth route.

Getting my husband on board was hard. I made him watch The Business of Being Born and then we met up with our midwife and he asked her every question he had. She answered them all for him. He walked out of the meeting saying we were going for a home birth. At first he was against it, dead set against it. I told him honestly, I love him, trust him and respect him however I was not taking my birth to a hospital again unless I absolutely had to. Yeah it was the cliche my body, my choice. It worked. He was nervous through out my pregnancy and birth but his fears were normal. After our son was born, he said he'd only do home births from then on.

Family approval, we didn't quite get it. We had both our moms against us and it was hard but I had to remind them that I felt this was necessary for me. That I was well aware of the risks and had a back up plan in case of an emergency. That they needed to trust in me that I knew what I was doing. I even took my mom to meet my midwife.

It all depends on your health insurance. That is something you have to look into to find out. Mine does not, so I pay out of pocket for it.
Marisa (29) married to J (35), mama to G (10), D (7), B (5) and K (1).
Little Miss joined our family Dec 4th, 2015 at 35 weeks.
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March 9th, 2010, 07:44 AM
Earthy.Mama's Avatar .*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 14,028
You're not getting ahead of yourself. Now you'll have a ton of time to research and communicate with your husband I hope you get your homebirth!!!

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March 10th, 2010, 10:44 PM
MrsSarah1's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: California
Posts: 2,617
I talked to him a little bit about it and he said "no".. but in a way that I know if I worked on him.. I would get him to say yes eventually. I'm sure a meeting with a midwife, talking with someone else that has done it, and a little research will sway him. So I guess I'll see you guys in a few years!
A daughter is the happy memories of the past, the joyful moments of the
present, and the hope and promise of the future.
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March 11th, 2010, 12:15 PM
Twinkle's Avatar Platinum Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: New York
Posts: 57,412
Hi hun! Glad to see you stopping in, even a few years early! Be sure to stick around and lurk as much as you want!!

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March 16th, 2010, 08:25 PM
GranolaMamaOf3's Avatar ~Heather~
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: GA
Posts: 5,906
Welcome! Ditto to what the other ladies said. and to answer your insurance question- every company/policy is different, as well as how the midwife chooses to run her practice...but my midwife told us, that if we had "out of network" coverage, than we would probably be covered.

You are never too early to start researching your options, and prepare yourself! I hope you get the HB you want!

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March 17th, 2010, 10:52 AM
TheOtherMichelle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 8,765
I'm also waiting to ttc and live in an unfriendly vbac area. I definitely recommend finding your local ICAN chapter and joining. I recently joined mine and they highly recommended a hb mw who takes a lot of vbac-ers.

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