Log In Sign Up

What is/did your SO do with work when baby comes?

Forum: Home Birth


Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to [email protected].

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Home Birth LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
April 16th, 2010, 02:52 PM
BobbityBoo's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: The Left Coast
Posts: 816
My DH almost exclusively works from home, so I really wasn't worried about where he was gonna be or time off, etc. He might take a day or two actually off but even when he went back to work his schedule is flexible enough that he could help out.

But now he is roped into this huge new project at work where he is required to be on site indefinitely. And it isn't just 9-5, it's like 80 hours a week. This current project is finishing up but they are starting a new one May 8th and going for at least a week. Dh feels like he can back off around that time, May 15th, as long as they don't start another project soon. Well I am due May 25th. His boss on this new project has a pregnant wife as well and she is due like 5 or 6 days after me.

He tried to talk to him a little bit about the schedule going forward and the babies coming and this guy's response was... "Oh that's not a big deal! I'll take a day or two but that's it." We were thinking he would scale it back a bit around that time and make it easier for DH to scale back as well, but apparently that isn't the case.

I'm trying really hard not to worry about it right now seeing as we have a ways to go and things are changing every two mins there. But a big part of the reason I decided on a home birth is to have this intimate experience for our family and I was full expecting DH to be around the whole time! I don't want to have to give birth and then him dash out the next day!

I know I have been spoiled with him working from home for so long, but it seems like dad's in a normal corporate environment are taking some vacation days. And yes, DH has those available but he is scared that this project is gonna run away without him if he takes time off. There is a potential promotion on the line for him. But I am just so upset! I was envisioning this great family bonding time after this peaceful home birth. Now I feel like I might as well go to the dang hospital! I'm not really... just being pouty!

ANyway, so what are your SO's doing about work? Are they taking vaca time? Using FMLA?

Thank you Kiliki for my wonderfull siggie!
Reply With Quote
April 16th, 2010, 03:30 PM
inyourhonor's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Metro Detroit
Posts: 16,734
With my 1st, my husband was home a week, same with our 2nd. This time finances are a bit different so he'll probably be home 2-3 days but will go back to work after that.
Marisa (29) married to J (35), mama to G (10), D (7), B (5) and K (1).
Little Miss joined our family Dec 4th, 2015 at 35 weeks.
Reply With Quote
April 16th, 2010, 04:10 PM
Twinkle's Avatar Platinum Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: New York
Posts: 57,412
My DH works a 4 on, 2 off schedule. Depending where on the schedule he is when I have the baby determines how much work he will take off. He will certainly take off one "set" meaning we'll have at least 8 days of him home. However if I have the baby in the middle of one set, we'll have a couple extra days with him. I'm actually at a point that I don't want him to be off more than a week or two. He's helpful, but sometimes its easier for me to get back into a routine when he goes back to work.

Check out Justmommies Blogs!

Are you interested in hosting a chat? Or maybe setting up a chat time for your board? Send me a PM for openings and more information!!
Reply With Quote
April 16th, 2010, 04:12 PM
Aeterna's Avatar Super Speshil
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: the edge of reason
Posts: 1,721
He was on R&R leave with our last baby.
G 12.04 | E 11.06 | D 11.08 | H 12.09 | R 11.14 | Expecting #6 2.17.18.

Reply With Quote
April 16th, 2010, 06:01 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 1
My DH is planning to take the summer off - in Canada we can do that. However - he didn't actually book time off till June - and my due date is May 20 - so I don't know what going to happen if I give birth in the beginning of May . . . I kinda thought he'd tell them he's off when baby comes. IDK. (Really hope baby stays put till the end of may - I'm hoping to work thru May - so things could get nuts fast!)

Thank you Kiliki for my first beautiful Siggie!

mom of 2 angels and an earth baby
Reply With Quote
April 16th, 2010, 07:36 PM
Effervescence's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 6,791
With Jonah, DH couldn't really take any time off. I went into the hospital on a Wed, and had Jonah on Friday, so that was pretty much the whole time that he could take off. Then he had the weekend, and Jonah and I stayed with my mom Sunday night-Tuesday, then I went home and was on my own. I didn't like being without DH, but I couldn't be alone with the baby (I was passing out) and my mom couldn't come to stay with us.

With this one, DH is supposed to have two weeks of vacation that he can take when the baby comes. But I am not sure that he's going to take it. He's in the middle of a huge project too. He can work from home though so I'm only a little worried about having time with him. I really like his new job; they are more family oriented when it comes to their employees. His last company didn't give a rat's tail about things like this.

Click the blinkies!

Thank You, Pattyandthemoos, for my beautiful siggy!
Reply With Quote
April 16th, 2010, 07:53 PM
MrsPil's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Quad Cities
Posts: 1,305
With DD G took off three days... I was pretty PO'd because his boss promised him six days - he just didn't feel like taking it (thought it would mean boss would "owe him on later"). This was after missing the birth because he didn't want to leave work. I was ticked.

This time I don't care - he can be here or not, I've done it by myself and I know my family and some of his will be around to help with M.
"I trust birth—not birth attendants—for if you only trust birth that is attended then you really don't trust birth at all. You trust the attendant. And then you start over. Who? Doctor, surgeon, CNM, CPM, SIM? And it goes on and on...." - Carla Hartley
"First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." -Gandhi
"What good fortune for those in power that people do not think." - Adolph Hitler

Reply With Quote
April 16th, 2010, 09:06 PM
laisydaisymama's Avatar Natural Birth Junkie
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Texas
Posts: 22,043
mine will take off a few days, lots of variables. depends on what day of the week I have baby, how I am recovering, how claire is coping with baby, how busy he is at work, etc.

basically he usually takes off 5+ days however that works out.

homebirthing, tandem nursing, cosleeping, babywearing, picky vaxing, cloth diapering Christian doula mama


Reply With Quote
April 16th, 2010, 10:50 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Michigan
Posts: 7,430
DD came 2 weeks early so DH had to call in for 2 of his shifts, and then worked 2 days, and then took an entire month off because he had PTO, comp, and sick time he had to use up before the end of the year!

It was nice to be home with him that long after the birth, I hope to plan our next pregnancies so we can have fall babies and he can use time like that again...
*9 weeks * 4/11/13
*5 weeks * 6/22/13
Reply With Quote
April 17th, 2010, 09:43 AM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 23,138
With DS, DH took off 2 weeks, called in saying he wasn't coming in when I was in labor and his 2 weeks started from then.

He is doing the same this time around.

Reply With Quote
April 17th, 2010, 10:34 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Bay Area CA
Posts: 19,074
DH took sick/vacation leave for a week this time. Then FMLA kicked in and he gets paid family leave with that here (55% of pay). So he was doing that and the plan was he'd stay home with us for 5 weeks with that. But then his work called and they really needed him so he's working a little bit for them but getting full pay even though he's not doing full hours. And then they're giving him an extra 2 weeks fully off at the end of April/beginning of May to make up for that.

Reply With Quote
April 17th, 2010, 02:21 PM
Alison79's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 10,232
He will take at least three days off to be home while I stay in bed with the new baby. His schedule is great - goes to work around 2 and gets home between 7-8. He does work a full day on Saturdays though and he may reduce those hours and take some vacation time.
Alison - Mom to: Emmeline (7/14), Augustus (2) Maximus (4) Eleanor (5) Reid (6) Evelyn (8) Lucas (13) Christopher (14)

Reply With Quote
April 18th, 2010, 07:29 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 826
DH was unemployed when DD was born and started working once she was about 3 months old. That was heaven. This time the plan is for him to take 3 weeks off with FMLA when baby comes.

Earn free Amazon gift cards with SWAGBUCKS!

Reply With Quote
April 18th, 2010, 08:58 AM
HappyHippy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Pavia, Italy
Posts: 5,959
DH is going back to school on Monday. Recovery has been going great, so I'm not very worried. He said if I need anything to call him and he'd come straight home. My mom does daycare not too far from me, so if she needs to take Hunter (our oldest) she can.
Mama to G, L & twins F & M
Started off 2013 homebirthing suprise twins Fia Celesta & Maddalena Isabella
Reply With Quote

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:55 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0