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October 4th, 2010, 08:21 PM
Isabelle's Avatar 3 Princes & 1 Princess
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: PA
Posts: 72,637
What are your family/friends reactions when you tell them you are planning a home birth?

I'm not sure if we are even going to tell our family our decision

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October 4th, 2010, 08:55 PM
inyourhonor's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Metro Detroit
Posts: 16,734
Our families did not like it when we decided to home birth our 2nd son. My SIL was the only supporting person. Our parents, nope. Well no, my FIL thought it was so neat.

We heard a lot of negative things, mainly because it was going to be a home vbac. They didn't like it, they worried about things going wrong. I proved them otherwise haha.

Now I have had 2 successful home vbacs and they've learned to just accept it.
Marisa (29) married to J (35), mama to G (10), D (7), B (5) and K (1).
Little Miss joined our family Dec 4th, 2015 at 35 weeks.
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October 4th, 2010, 09:21 PM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Clovis, CA
Posts: 37,585
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Ive told my SIL and she has been pretty supportive of our decision. Havent really talked to anyone else about it. A few friends and of course the ladies on JM they all have been super supportive. But I know my mom will probably flip her lid so we are not sure if we are saying anything.

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October 4th, 2010, 11:16 PM
Kelllilee's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Washington State
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Mostly curiosity and they asked a few questions about how things work, what happens if there's a problem, etc... The only "negative" response was from one of my sisters who just didn't understand why I wouldn't want to be in the hospital "just in case".
Kellisa, Mama to:
Courtney, Nola, Kya, Whitney, and baby girl #5 coming soon!
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October 4th, 2010, 11:29 PM
laisydaisymama's Avatar Natural Birth Junkie
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Texas
Posts: 22,043
I basically just get looked at like I am a crazy hippie. It made people nervous but the only person who's opinion I valued was my mom and she was here, so she was thrilled lol. She didn't get to be there in the hospital!

homebirthing, tandem nursing, cosleeping, babywearing, picky vaxing, cloth diapering Christian doula mama


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October 5th, 2010, 01:58 AM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 23,138
My ILs (even though they don't like me) were glad i think we were having a homebirth- they had homebirths. DH was born at home.

My parents i think were a lil bit worried but didn't give us a hard time or anything thankfully.

My friends i think they all thought i was crazy/brave- they all said asked "can you get pain meds" lol. No. they all are pro meds and epidurals, so of course they didn't understand, but thankfully didn't shun me or osmething.

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October 5th, 2010, 08:32 AM
HippyMomOf4's Avatar Hippy Mom Extraordinaire
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Location: Tulare, CA
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The only people that know are my friends and my mom and dad. Pretty much all my friends think its awesome even had a few tell me that they thought about doing that but got to scared lol. My mom and dad thinks its a great idea. Now my IL's don't even know im pregnant yet lol so ill let yall know how that one goes lol

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October 5th, 2010, 10:18 AM
bre4thewin's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Fort Bragg, NC
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My mom and dad have been pretty supportive. Im rather picky about who i tell because i do not need to be defending our decision, so i dont announce it.

Thank you Mom2*Lauryn*Jacob* for my gorgeous siggie!

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October 5th, 2010, 11:00 AM
Isabelle's Avatar 3 Princes & 1 Princess
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: PA
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Originally Posted by bre4thewin View Post
Im rather picky about who i tell because i do not need to be defending our decision, so i dont announce it.
This is how I'm feeling.

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October 5th, 2010, 11:32 AM
NiKA's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 1,253
I've told a few people. My parents while it wouldn't be their choice are supportive because it's MY choice. Same with my sis. My DH's family on the other hand is way more enthusiastic and supportive. my SIL has had 2 homebirths and is helping me with a lot of my questions
Thank you to Kiliki for my Siggy
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October 5th, 2010, 12:07 PM
Twinkle's Avatar Platinum Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: New York
Posts: 57,412
I didn't share it with a lot of people the first time around, but the second time I did. I'm proud of our decision and would defend it to anyone. I did become quiet the activist between my 1st homebirth and my second though. I certainly understand not wanting to defend your decision and wanting to keep it quiet so that you don't have to surround yourself with negative energy.

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October 5th, 2010, 12:13 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2008
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If dh says YES...then I'll be more willing to tell people....I did say something to my mom and she said "I'm not sure I'd do a homebirth"....so I know I'll get "fake" support from her...like she does homeschooling (support to my face...and not when dh is the only one around....this has really buggered up our otherwise CLOSE relationship...she doesn't know I know these things)....

Dh's family wont be supportive...we probably wont tell them....I know some of my friends will be supportive....so we might bring it up to them....if it comes up....but I think I'll probably just keep it to myself....
Momma to Emma, Elzie, Gretchen, Olive, and Rogan

We aren't to give a baby milk, berries, or peanut butter. We are to introduce new foods one at a time. But it's OK to inject several viruses, bacteria, aluminum, formaldehyde, phenoxyethanol, animal serum, mercury, squalene and more into an 8 week old? I don't think so.
In order to be healthy it is an unfortunate fact that people must be allowed the opportunity to be ill. I trust my body and those of my children to work correctly against the relatively benign diseases they vax for, and do not trust the ingredients in the vaccinations.
Our choice to not vax isn't based in ignorance, poverty, conspiracy theory and rumor. It's research, common sense, fact and evidence based..something the medical community has largely forgot about.
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October 5th, 2010, 02:56 PM
Earthy.Mama's Avatar .*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.
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Posts: 14,028
They didn't say anything. I think they were too afraid to comment honestly. DH told me a few weeks ago that his friends never bring up parenting, pregnancy or birth around me because he's forewarned them I guess...

Co-Host July 2014 DDC

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October 8th, 2010, 01:17 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Michigan
Posts: 7,430
I will not be telling my family... the way I was treated by my family for wanting a NCB was cruel I dare not go through that again my birth plans are mine and my husbands business only...
*9 weeks * 4/11/13
*5 weeks * 6/22/13
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October 8th, 2010, 09:13 PM
Tiff802's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Georgia
Posts: 15,290
My friends and family are really supportive. One aunt of mine calls me a hippie, but that doesn't bother me, lol. Everyone around me knows my passion with natural childbirth so I don't think anyone is really shocked with my decision.

Thank you for my beautiful siggy Vicki!

See my growing belly!

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October 9th, 2010, 03:38 PM
mommybugnbugga's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: AL
Posts: 1,546
The only person who knows I want a homebirth is one of my sisters. She is supportive of my decision (even though she doesn't agree) but she is concerned because there is a strong family history of hemmoraging after birth. But when I told her what my midwife said about this, she was a little less scared (this was also the BIGGEST concern my dh had). My family just kind of rolls their eyes at my "hippie ways". I don't think me having a home birth would be a big concern to them, my IL's on the other hand lectured me that breastfeeding was bad and cloth diapers were nasty. They will not know we are planning a homebirth, unless MIL decides she wants to come down for the birth, then she will know. If not, then we will announce that we had a homebirth after the baby is born. The newborn pics will have the baby in a shirt that says "Home Made and Home Birthed" that is provided by my midwife. I really don't care what they say after it is done. Then they can't try to make dh second guess our decision (which they are great at!).

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October 9th, 2010, 08:54 PM
c'est_la_vie's Avatar Is it nap time yet?
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: EARTH
Posts: 27,742
I honestly don't care who knows. I'm thrilled and nothing they could really say or do - like rolling their eyes or what not, could kick me off my excitement. Its what is best for me, my family, and we're very happy with it. Carlos is thrilled to not have to deal with the hospital, as am I. I think people are who are more close minded and traditional will be the ones against views, but that is because thats who they are..

You've had 3 normal easy births - its not like you're at risk for complications or anything, so I don't see what they could really say.. Aside from the typical comments that spout from ignorance on the subject of a Home Birth.
Mommy. Vegan & Straight Edge. Doula & Placenta Encapsulator. Animal Rights Activist.

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October 11th, 2010, 08:17 AM
HappyHippy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Pavia, Italy
Posts: 5,959
On my side of the family they were accepting and supporitve from the start. My Grandma had her last 2 at home, but not planned. She's a very stubborn person and she wasn't going to go out in the rain with the first homebirth. So she went back to bed and had him there. With her second homebirth her water broke and she said she wouldn't make it, so again, went to bed and had him there. My mom didn't have a homebirth, but she did catch me. She gave birth in the hospital waiting room, I was born in a blizzard in a very small hospital and the Doctor hadn't made it and the nurse knew nothing.

DH's family were supportive, but concerned. However, there one of his family members had all 3 of their kids at home, and they're Doctors. When we were farther along MIL got less concerned because she saw how well we were prepared and how well the pregnancy had been going.

They all think it's super cool now and my mom, MIL and Grandpa like to brag as much as they can.
Mama to G, L & twins F & M
Started off 2013 homebirthing suprise twins Fia Celesta & Maddalena Isabella
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